Diagnosed Yesterday

[disillusioned]

I was visually diagnosed yesterday with h and have spent a lot of time looking for information on the condtion. I am SO glad to have found this discussion board. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

Every since the doc matter of factly announced "you have a bladder infection and that raw spot is herpes" and just sent me out the door with handfull of scripts, my head has been spinning. (Oh, she did spend a minute getting onto me about having unprotected sex- thanks, that's just want I needed to hear at that moment) I feel like a marked person. I was waiting for the pharmacist to announce over the loudspeaker "The lady with herpes... your prescription is ready".

Despite all the physical pain I'm in, it's the emotional reality of it all that has me on the verge of tears all the time. I'm in relatively new relationship (3 months over the summer and back together for about the last month an a half) and told him last night. The conversation went much better than I expected- he didn't call me names and run out the door like the scenario I had played out in my head all day long. He actually let me cry all over him and told me "we'd get through this together". He denies ever having any symptoms but will be getting tested in the next few days. One question I have-- if it turns out that he is positive for HSV, does this mean we're alright to return to a normal sex life together as long as we're not having an outbreak? Since he claims to have never had an ob, could this aggravate any dormancy he has and possibly create an outbreak in him? I can guarantee nothing will happen until he gets tested, but I can't guarantee he'll stick around if he's negative. I fear that "we'll get through this together" means "we'll get through this together if we BOTH have it". I guess after such a short time together, I can't expect much more. I know that until a medical test confirms it, we can't be certain about anything, but I've been reading that your initial bo occurs 2-20 days after exposure. Wouldn't this mean that I HAD to have gotten it from him since I haven't been with anyone else? I'm not understanding the information that says people can have it for years and not know it. It contradicts the information about initial bo's after exposure. Is it just different for everyone, or do people have the initial bo and not realize that's what it is? I'm not trying to lay blame with anyone. Im just confused and don't know where else to turn since my doctor seems to be so supportive and full of information (I say sarcastically).

Thanks for any input! Sorry this is so long, but finding this out has turned my world upside down!

[brisco38]

Don't get desperate and try to relax a little. I'll tell you what I've tell some others, once you learn about the HSV you'll see that it's not the end of the word for you. Certainly you will face some pain when OB from now on but if well treated it won't last.

I've been reading quite a lot about HSV and it's different in everybody. You could have it and not have any symptoms for years or vice-versa. Maybe you had an OB and didn't notice since symptoms are similar to many other conditions.

It should be a most that he go to a doctor before further sex. If he has it you can still have sex and if he doesn't just have protected sex.

Just read about the condition and be happy!