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New member-have had herpes for 16 years


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I got it at age 16 by a boyfriend. I knew right away I had 'something' because as you know..the 1st outbreak IS HORRIBLE!!

Went to the clinic and boom. I spread it before I had my outbreak visible to me also...and until I was mature I spread it alot, actually. My education as horrible as well..even when I didn't know I was spreading it..I was.

I was pretty pissed off when I knew this was a life long problem. I had a hate for men and also just 'spread' it. I hated them.

I was married in 93 and was w/him for 3 yrs..and never told him. He never asked. He would see a 'sore' on him but you know they look like lil cuts sometimes and he thought it was from 'friction' from having rough sex...

and I am remarried ..since 02 but I was mature this time and told him first.

He didn't speak to me for a whole day and than came back to me...decided to have sex w/me .. unprotected ..at that ..and we been together ever since.

I also have a boy who gonna be 11 next mth..and a 6 yr. old step son.

Glad to see a site like this! I live in so much secrecy!

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I am new at this so please bear with me...


I was diagnosed in June of 05 by a former boyfriend who didn't know that he had it. When I found out you would thought that someone told me that I was going to die tomorrow. I told no one except him and my 2 former best friends at the time. He was devestated that he had given it to me because after he found out that he had it he gave me the opportunity to leave and I didn't because I was in love. Needless to say, he and I broke up and I again thought that my life was going to come to an end again. My thought pattern was that I was going to be single for the rest of my life. I decided last February or so to do suppressive therapy. I have been outbreak free for a year now. My dilemma is I have gotten back together with a past boyfriend from anout 10 years ago, and I feel that he is my soul mate the man that I am going to spend the rest of my life with. I was up front and honest with him about having herpes and he accepted me anyways. He wants to to look into Kevin Trudeau's "Natural Cure" for herpes. the information that I am seeing are telling me otherwise. I know that there is no cure for herpes or so pharmaceutical companies say, but I honestly think there is. They are making millions on top of millions from Valtrex and don't want to give up their gold mine. My delimma is I want to be able to get to a point with my boyfriend where we will not have to have sex with condoms, where we can oral sex and me not give it to him. I need some serious help!!!!

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my ex-husband gaev me herpes when i was 15 years old. i had one outbreak at the age of 15 1/2 went to the doctor he burned them off and since then i have never had a out break again and i am now 30 years.. i frogot all about that out break until my ex-husband brought it up 2 days ago.. now i am worried about well was my boyfriend last week but we are now broken up.. I am worried he might have gotten it .. he already thinks i sleeped around on him when i never cheeted on him with anyone I am scared. could he have gotten it after 14 years of not having it (NO OUTBREAKS SINCE THEN) PLEASE HELP THANKS TINA

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yeah, warts (HPV) are burned off.....not herpes lesions or sores HPV is also a virus that never goes away but usually after you receive treatment (a cream, laser them off, freeze them off, or burn them off) they tend to never activate again in people for the rest of their lives...that is the most common affect they have on people. A small population of people have them recurring but most afre like the way you described your experience. I def. dont think it was herpes based on what you wrote.

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I can relate to that!!

It was 1999 when i had my wisdom teeth pulled. I was under stress. I had a coldsore on the right side of my mouth. I was a little out of it because of the painkillers i was on. I accidentally spread the "coldsore" from my lip to my gentials.

Thats when i got educated about "coldsores". I didnt realize they were the herpes virus.


"He didn't speak to me for a whole day and than came back to me...decided to have sex w/me .. unprotected ..at that ..and we been together ever since"

That is exatly how it was for me. I was afraid to tell wayne when i met him. But i did, gave him some info. And it happened just like you described!!. We've been together for 6yrs come the end of june!! ;)



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    • Ric12321
      it's actually because of bareback bj...
    • scurrred
      I had an IGG test  and the ranges were out of range and high  HSV 1 was 42 and HSV 2 was 19 so I guess it was accurate but the problem now is I can't figure out when or who I got it from. In 2018 to 2019 when I was with my ex I was STD tested but not sure if herpes was included but my ex was supposed to get tested but refused. I experienced some trauma with him and didn't date until a year and a half later so I'm confused. The guy I dated after the ex who didn't want to be tested I told them a week ago about my results he was trying to be there for me and understanding,I told him to get tested but to request a herpes blood test , because he had no noticeable lesions or bumps ever is what he said and I never noticed any on him now he has shut down all his social media and I can't reach him. Hoping he's okay, I feel bad because in 2018 I did have what I was told it was an abrasion that tingled but at my doctor the day I was tested they told me it wasn't herpes but I think it was only a visible diagnosis. I keep having it reoccur from time to time 
    • CHT
      Hello "FeelingLost".... your fears and concerns are understandable but, nothing you've described regarding the sexual encounter would cause you to contract herpes.... further, your symptoms are not herpes related.  Best of all, your doctor is correct, your results don't show any herpes here.  You can relax.... definitely have your GP take a look at things and see what might be causing the symptoms but, again, none of them are typical herpes related.  I wish you the best in terms of talking to your wife about this encounter.... hopefully she will understand and you both can work through this amicably.  We all make mistakes.... be careful not to beat yourself up too hard over this.... you can become so racked with guilt that you start imagining physical symptoms.  Best of luck.... and take care..... come back to the site if you have questions.
    • FeelingLost75
      Hi (I’m really scared and feel really disappointed in myself and worried about my future), I had oral sex with a condom almost 3 weeks ago and a massage parlor. I also received a hand job at the same time prior to putting a condom on, also may have rubbed my penis on her back a little. Did not touch her genitals I don’t recall any sores on her back. After the event she handed me a pice of TP and after I took off the condom I wiped my penis head to clear away the excess ejaculation…this is where I suspect I got infected, she had just gone pee and wiped and maybe touched a sore or something and then I got it on my penis from the tp? Idk. I’m just flailing.   After this I’ve had discomfort on the skin below the head of my penis and 4 bumps for 2 weeks now, the bumps don’t seem to have changed in size. I also had frequent urination for about a week and have had dull pain in my groin on and off. I also have some pins and needles on the sides of my abdomen/trunk that get worse when I go out in the heat or get dehydrated. I’ve had a lot of trouble sleeping, likely due to guilt and shame and worry about the future.   so I got one test done at 10 days from the event (idk know if this can tell me anything… the doctor assured me it was 100% correct and I don’t have herpes. I was not physically examined). I got a full panel std. neg for everything. HSV-1 results: IgG 0.3 / HSV-2 IgG 0.9 hsv-1 IgM = 2.2 hsv-2 IgM = 3.0 (Reference V. Negative: Less than 9.0 Borderline: 9.0 to 11.0 Positive: Greater than 11.0) I have an appointment with my GP on Thursday, hoping he can help. Will likely go to a std testing service tomorrow to see if I can get in an antiviral proactively. Plan to get tested again this week.    
    • TS4real
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