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Saying hello, some questions


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Hello... I have had cold sores for years since I was little. I am 21 now and have been in a relationship with a guy who also has them. We have been together for about 2 1/2 years and live together. I get my cold sores every 3-5 months or so depending on stress mainly. Right now, I am dealing with a BAD one. Just finally getting over it using Abreva, Campho-phenique and lots of TLC :) They really aren't caused by diet or sun exposure in any way since I have been a habitual fake-baker and go to the lake ALOT. My mom gets them and I have tons of friends who get them also. I also have a few friends who have genital herpes. One is a BEST friend whom I love very dearly.

That is a little info about me, now I have a few questions. Since I have had the cold sores for so long, would I be susceptible to getting it genitally from oral sex from my boyfriend? We definitely take the precautions, even though we both get cold sores, not to kiss or have oral sex, but recently I've done some research and learned that I could get it through the shedding stages. This makes me a bit scared as we perform oral sex on eachother quite often.

Along with this, since we already get cold sores and both have since we were children, I'm going to guess and say we have HSV-1, the most commonly seen and recurring in the oral area. So another question is, if either of us may already have it genitally and not know, like so many do, will a blood test let us know? Or will it just tell us what we already know? (That we have HSV-1... orally)

This has come up because we have talked about getting married and having children and with the possibility of him shedding to me and me not knowing I have the virus, I am afraid to pass it on (In the future) to our child.

I just want to take the precautions because of what I have learned recently. I thought I would run it by you guys first. Is it even worth getting a blood test? Or will it just tell me that I have HSV-1 antibodies and not let me know where? Also, since I've had HSV-1 for so long, is it true about my antibodies being built up against contracting the virus below the belt??? Does the risk lessen even more over time???

Thanks for listening


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    • Ric12321
      it's actually because of bareback bj...
    • scurrred
      I had an IGG test  and the ranges were out of range and high  HSV 1 was 42 and HSV 2 was 19 so I guess it was accurate but the problem now is I can't figure out when or who I got it from. In 2018 to 2019 when I was with my ex I was STD tested but not sure if herpes was included but my ex was supposed to get tested but refused. I experienced some trauma with him and didn't date until a year and a half later so I'm confused. The guy I dated after the ex who didn't want to be tested I told them a week ago about my results he was trying to be there for me and understanding,I told him to get tested but to request a herpes blood test , because he had no noticeable lesions or bumps ever is what he said and I never noticed any on him now he has shut down all his social media and I can't reach him. Hoping he's okay, I feel bad because in 2018 I did have what I was told it was an abrasion that tingled but at my doctor the day I was tested they told me it wasn't herpes but I think it was only a visible diagnosis. I keep having it reoccur from time to time 
    • CHT
      Hello "FeelingLost".... your fears and concerns are understandable but, nothing you've described regarding the sexual encounter would cause you to contract herpes.... further, your symptoms are not herpes related.  Best of all, your doctor is correct, your results don't show any herpes here.  You can relax.... definitely have your GP take a look at things and see what might be causing the symptoms but, again, none of them are typical herpes related.  I wish you the best in terms of talking to your wife about this encounter.... hopefully she will understand and you both can work through this amicably.  We all make mistakes.... be careful not to beat yourself up too hard over this.... you can become so racked with guilt that you start imagining physical symptoms.  Best of luck.... and take care..... come back to the site if you have questions.
    • FeelingLost75
      Hi (I’m really scared and feel really disappointed in myself and worried about my future), I had oral sex with a condom almost 3 weeks ago and a massage parlor. I also received a hand job at the same time prior to putting a condom on, also may have rubbed my penis on her back a little. Did not touch her genitals I don’t recall any sores on her back. After the event she handed me a pice of TP and after I took off the condom I wiped my penis head to clear away the excess ejaculation…this is where I suspect I got infected, she had just gone pee and wiped and maybe touched a sore or something and then I got it on my penis from the tp? Idk. I’m just flailing.   After this I’ve had discomfort on the skin below the head of my penis and 4 bumps for 2 weeks now, the bumps don’t seem to have changed in size. I also had frequent urination for about a week and have had dull pain in my groin on and off. I also have some pins and needles on the sides of my abdomen/trunk that get worse when I go out in the heat or get dehydrated. I’ve had a lot of trouble sleeping, likely due to guilt and shame and worry about the future.   so I got one test done at 10 days from the event (idk know if this can tell me anything… the doctor assured me it was 100% correct and I don’t have herpes. I was not physically examined). I got a full panel std. neg for everything. HSV-1 results: IgG 0.3 / HSV-2 IgG 0.9 hsv-1 IgM = 2.2 hsv-2 IgM = 3.0 (Reference V. Negative: Less than 9.0 Borderline: 9.0 to 11.0 Positive: Greater than 11.0) I have an appointment with my GP on Thursday, hoping he can help. Will likely go to a std testing service tomorrow to see if I can get in an antiviral proactively. Plan to get tested again this week.    
    • TS4real
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