Thinking about dating...

[MalFunkShun]

Hi everyone,

I'm new here, and I'm currently dating someone who has HSV-2. I have HSV-1 I think, I get a single cold sore once every couple months if that would actually be HSV-1. I've been browsing the forums and reading up on it a lot lately, but I still have some questions that I would like to have answered. Your help would be greatly appreciated.

First off, I'm curious, I know that between 50-80% of people have HSV-1, and I wouldn't find it devastating if I did have it, because hey, I've made it this far no problem, and when I HAVE had outbreaks, I've avoided all kissing and sexual (oral) contact. From what I've described before, do I have HSV-1? And is the only time I can pass it on during an OB?

Second, through the use of condoms, Valtrex, and no sex during warning signs and during outbreaks, whats the probability of me actually catching it? If there were no warning signs, no outbreaks, could I still catch it through bodily fluids?

Lastly, is it wrong for me to delay a complete relationship until I'm completely understanding of the virus and comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship? I feel bad that we've been dating 2 weeks and I'm still unsure of what I would like to do. She's a wonderful girl, she's funny, attractive... everything I look for in a girl, I just don't want to make her feel any more alienated than she probably already does (No offense to anyone intended!).

I appreciate your help and answers, thank you all.

[WaxedWrong]

if u have ever had a cold sore> u have herpes - cant tell u which type as u would need a specific test for that (also let it be know u can have either 1- or 2 orally, or genitally)

and yes, you can spread/catch herpes through bodily fluids (like saliva, and genital fluids)

and no need to worry> shes got herpes, youve got herpes-

ur both in the same boat.

just dont do anything during outbreaks, and take meds/vitamins, and use protection and ull be alright- oh yea and already having herpes, make you harder to catch it again

[MalFunkShun]

Do I need to go to a special type of doctor to get the test? Or would I get a phone call if I donated blood (I do on a regular basis)? I know they screen but would they let me know over Herpes or only HIV and AIDS?

[WaxedWrong]

the blood people> prob wouldnt call you. herpes isnt really a "blood" issue, like aids, or hep c. of course they want the best perfect blood, but they run those things through a series of test / filters before it gets to anyone.

you can go to any general doctor, and ask for a herpes test. if u dont have any obvious sores, they will do a blood test.

http://www.redcross.org/services/biomed/0,1082,0_557_,00.html

[hopingseeking]

Herpes isn't transmittable via blood (although I've read that the exception is during your first outbreak), so you're still okay to donate blood.

[MalFunkShun]

Last question I'm still kinda wondering about... its not wrong for me to delay a full relationship is it? We decided to go to a doctor and discuss it because I'd really like to move forward with the relationship, but just going one day at a time. I'm glad she's been this comfortable with it thus far, but I'm not being selfish am I?

[exotica]

It's your body and your mind

You sound like a sweet and responsible guy. I admire your strength and courage. I have HSV 2 and I just recently started dating. I think that would be a smart decision to wait until you have all the information you want and be comfortable about the issue before moving forward. It would be best for you and your partner. It will make your relationship stronger. Maintain communication.

[NewGuy311]

oh yea and already having herpes, make you harder to catch it again

Does having HSV-1 orally make it harder to catch HSV-2 on your genitals?