In shock

[sandrink]

Hi everyone, 2 days ago i was diagnosed with genital herpes since I had the nasty painful breakouts for the first time, I have never been with anybody else since I met my husband and neither has he. Why did I get the breakouts 2 days ago after having had unprotected sex with my husband the whole time? This means either me or my husband had the virus since we met each other the first time? But why none of us showed any signs before? Why did I get the breakouths instead of him first? If we had always had sex without protection since we met each othr the first time (again, we never cheated) and a year later I get the breakouts, this means that we both have the virus and we didn't know it, until I was diagnosed 2 days ago??? The virus remained dormant this whole time? or, can he be negative? could we have contiagious each other in the dormant stage? Please I need answers, I can't wait until he gets tested to know If he might have it... I would feel awful If it's me who can get him the virus

[Ms.Informed]

Hi, Sandrink,

I have just joined this forum recently as well and, like you, I have recently had my first outbreak of genital herpes after 22 years of marriage in which we both maintain we have been faithful. I will share with you what the good people of this forum have shared with me as well as my own research and dr. info. Apparently, you or your husband could have potentially been carrying the virus for many years without symptoms. You could both have been carriers. Certain stresses such as physical illness, fatigue, emotional stresses etc. could trigger an outbreak(as well as other causes). There is also the possibility that although you have GH and you have had unprotected sex with your husband, he may still not be infected. That will hopefully all be cleared up when the test results are in. The best way to know for sure is if an outbreak occurs and an open sore is swabbed and sent for culture but if he doesnt have any symptoms that isnt an option. This is not a very conclusive answer to your concerns and that is frustrating (believe me, I know!!). Having sexual conact with your husband does put him at risk of contracting GH if he isnt already infected. Mind blowing, isnt it. I am thankful that I am in a monogomous relationship in which we are now both informed and I am choosing to trust my husband at his word as he is me. This must be a very difficult time for you both but if you can lean on each other and get well informed it will be easier. There are some great sites and some very knowledgable, kind people on this forum so dont be shy to ask away. Good luck. Ms.