simple ?? but cant find answer

[gnitruh]

Does anyone know or has anyone heard anything about spreading H by intimate kissing with no cold sores present?

[wonderwall]

asymptomatic shedding

yes. since the herpes virus stays in your nerve center for the rest of your life, it has the ability to shed (reproduce itself in your skin, making you contageous) even when you have no symptoms. however, this "shedding" of the virus happens less often than when cold sores are present. when cold sores are present, it sheds constantly, making you highly contageous. the frequency of shedding depends on the individual and the type and location of herpes. it is impossible to say when one is shedding or how often one sheds.

this is based on research i was doing on basically all the credible websites i could find, including NHS, a canadian health website and multiple herpes and skincare sights. i'm very concerned about this as i've just recently contracted cold sores myself.

[wonderwall]

i hope that helps.

i'm a little annoyed i can't edit my posts!

if that's not the answer you were looking for, there are many more-knowledgable people on this forum than myself. plus, there are loads of websites out there that will give you more information than i can.

[gnitruh]

Thanks for the info, I appreciate it. I guess what I'm looking for is a way to find out if my HSV 1 is actually oral or genital.

If it is oral, based on info you've read, is sounds like you can never kiss anyone again (even when you not having symptoms) I hope that isnt the case. I cant imagine that people disclose that they have HSV 1 just to kiss. what do you think?

[wonderwall]

to be honest i'm trying to figure that out right about now.

most sources say "avoid kissing others while blisters are present"

and, judging by the fact that children are much more suceptible to hsv, i would guess be really really careful around children and wash your hands often. (i'm especially worried about this. my sister doesn't have children, but when she does will i not be able to kiss them on the cheek?)

but i haven't found anything reliable about moral obligations involving kissing when there are no blisters. the only thing i've found is that it is indeed possible to spread hsv by kissing or other contact even when blisters are not present (asymptomatic shedding), and also that this is less likely than when blisters are present, but still a possibility.

do we not, then, have an obligation to warn others, regardless of whether we're currently showing symptoms?

i'm getting really worried. according to the statistics i've read, about one third of people in the usa and half? of people in the uk have oral hsv1. (i've read so many different statistics on this i'm probably confused.) i guess many of them don't show symptoms. and if you look at the amount of cold sore medication there is out there, it's obviously a big business. so then i'd assume it's really common. i've never heard anything about anyone having to say "wait! don't drink from my drink! i have oral herpes!" or "no i can't make out with you without having a talk first... i have oral herpes..." generally, it seems to be a non-issue if there are no sores.

but is it just that people don't know what it really is and that they can spread it without showing symptoms?

apparently, it's embarrassing to have genital hsv, but not oral? i'm embarrassed by it, that's for sure. and no one ever told me cold sores ARE herpes. i found it out by looking up "cold sore" on google. you'd think more people would know- it's so out there on the web.

i don't know. anyone else have any thoughts on this? i've been hunting around for some information on this for weeks. i even asked "go ask alice." in fact, it's the reason i ended up joining this forum.

[gnitruh]

Thanks for your responses. It's nice to have some one elses view on this crap. I'm not sure either. I have HSV 1 and 2 however dont know if the 1 is oral 1 or genital 1 and my doctor is a jerk who wants me to make an appointment 2 months from now to ask him these questions! I have never had an actual cold sore (according to pictures ive seen) but I've had tiny ulsers every now and then on the inside, but It's the type Ive been getting since i was a teenager from too much salt or certain foods etc...and Ive kissed before with no problems, and this all prior to my being diagnosed. So hopefully kissing when you dont have lip sores is ok..who knows??

I'm so confused now that I'm noticing every blemish, bump, and redness on my face no matter how tiny and freakin out about it thinking its an outbreak. I wish there was a definitive place or number to get accurate info. Im like you in reading for hours on this info and its confusing and conflicting.

Anyway, thanks for your input its greatly appreciated

[BoxofRain]

yes, people with oral hsv have an obligation to disclose their status before sexual contact and kissing due to the ability to shed without symptoms present....also because of the risk involved also with giving someone else oral sex if the sexual contact progressed. It is sad however that many people dont understand the risks involve or that they can transmit the virus without symptoms when they have it orally and unfortunately that is how many people acquire this virus. So in my opinion the people who are educated enough to know their coldsores are actually herpes, and to understand they can be contagious even without visible symptoms, I feel it is their responsibility to disclose that BEFORE kissing and other stuff. Its only fair ya know? its the same for genital herpes......either one.....how would you feel if no one told you of their status for either one and had no symptoms and infected you without you understanding and voluntarily choosing the risk....kinda messed up of people to deceive like that. Also, there are the many people with oral hsv out there who justify to themselves that its not that big of a deal and try to believe if they dont have a coldsore at the time, they dont need to mention it.....sucks in my opinion.

[skindeep]

Relax it will be ok

Hi there, Im new but I wanted to give you some much needed perspective on HSV 1. I have had it since I was a kid; most people have too. The statistics say that close to 90% of the population has it, and most people dont even know. I wouldnt stress so much about it really, in the 14 years I have been with my bf (husband for 11) he has never gotten it. (proven by blood tests) and we have kissed billions of times. We also have type 2 genital. (not that it matters in this discussion)

I understand that it is tough since I get type 1 outbreaks every few months, but even though I have outbreaks often, he has never gotten it. Oral hsv1 is sooooo common. I know the word herpes makes it feel like it is the end of the world but it is a coldsore and most people have the virus even if they never have outbreaks. I wouldnt stress about never kissing someone, even if you told them they wouldnt turn you away. How could they there is a 90% chance they have it too.

I hope this doesnt come off wrong to those of you this devastates but I am hopefully giving you some peace. Having both type 1 and 2, I know how much we need it; truely I do. I am also a nurse, so I tend to research information a lot and I'm not in the business of offering false hope.

As far as it being geital type 1 or oral, more than likely it is oral. Most people due have the virus and never get outbreaks. There is a way to find out, if you have an outbreak get it swabbed when it starts. Other than that you can only assume, but even with that assumption know that you are not alone. When I told my husband when we were dating he laughed, then said ok...so you dont want to kiss me is that it? Relax, your life truely is not over, probaly just beginning. Take care, we all need it!

It really is only,

skin deep

(good thing who we are isnt!)

[gnitruh]

Dear Skindeep and BoxofRain, Thank you both for the replies. I agree with both of you.

SKin. I thank you for the glimpse of peace, your right we need it. I wish I could get a culture from an oral outbreak, but I dont get the normal OB's. I get a blister or canker every now and then inside. I dont know if that is an OB or not. Do you know if that can be cultured to see if the HSV 1 is in my mouth?