Jump to content
World's Largest Herpes Support Group
Sign in to follow this  
noring

I thought I was okay

Recommended Posts

noring

So, i went out on a date tonight and cried all the way home.

Backstory...I met him a year ago and since then we have been out together many times but just seemed to make better friends. About a month or so ago he gave me an offer of a relationship. I struggled a bit with the age differene (12 years) but decided to try it out and agreed to weekly dates...ease my way into it. I agreed to this just a day before my diagnosis. We went on two dates since and I absolutely love spending time with him and now do feel that I could be with him every day. Tonight he began to hint around again about a relationship and I couldnt get myself to say anything. I left there with a smile on my face because he makes me feel so good but yet I cried all the way home because I dont wanna tell him about you know what. I keep wondering if I should tell him at all...should I just keep us as friends so I dont ever have to tell him or...should I tell him and risk losing a great friend.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
FML123

Dont cry :( Just tell him. Ive told two guys so far and they were sooo accepting. That blew my mind! You seem to like him. Just tell him. If he is your true friend he will accept it regardless! What person in their right mind would stop being somebody's friend because of this!? That's like saying...you have shingles...I am not your friend. Who does that? No normal human being. Idk...he seems like a good guy...he seems like he will accept it. Follow your heart though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
noring

Thanks, You have great words of advice. I guess I just need a bit more courage. Even if he decides not to be more than friends...it would be nice to have a friend who knows.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
chickentuna

eventhough im still with the boyfriend that gave H to ME, i can still relate to the dating thing... what if i have to start over, what if i have to tell someone else.. but yeh FML123 you had some great words and seems like you have helped noring.. To Noring, yes this guy seems accepting. and as an older gentlemen (i like older guys too :) ) he SHOULD be mature about the situation.. and like you said if he is just a good friend throughout your life, that would only mean the world to you because we all need that one person at least to talk to in person about this, also, keep us updated on your date ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
noring

I've told the handful of guys I've been with since I think I got it. Some were very accepting and supportive, others were pretty shitty. I only told them cuz I felt it fair to tell them to get tested. Kinda so I could find out if I got it from them too. Telling them was tough as hell and these are guys who have seen me naked. I've not told friends because if it was tough to tell the guys it would be tougher to tell people whom I haven't shared intimacy with. I was able to have sexual conversation with the guys but don't do that with the friends. (No, I don't have close girlfriends that I share everything with)

Anyway, with the guy I had the date with he is 12 years younger not older. That makes a bit of a difference with telling him huh chickentuna.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

  • The Hive is Thriving!

    • Total Topics
      69,110
    • Total Posts
      463,487
  • Posts

    • MikeHerp
      Just read how Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez helped raise $340,000 for transgender youth. https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/alexandria-ocasio-cortez-casually-joins-171241889.html It sure would help if we had some celebrity or public person champion our cause. Maybe that should be our focus, to reach out to public persons and try to enlist them.  All it takes is a tweet from the right person.
    • MikeHerp
      Dr. Iwasaki is definitely deserving of funding. I'd love it if we could do a fund raiser for her. I guess at the moment we are already doing the Fred Hutch Center.
    • hopeful22
      Thank you for all this info. This is very encouraging. 
    • Alice28
      Hi, I’ve had HSV1g for 4 years and only ever had my first and only breakout. I’m super thankful for that. I still hate disclosing as it sets off alarms. Finally met a guy I really really like and disclosed last night to be clear about why I’ve been hesitant to be intimate.  We have for sure kissed and after telling he was in a panick about us having kissed. I’ve never ever had cold sores and have never passed it to anyone. Again in 4 years only my first and only genital HsV1 breakout. I’ve always been told kissing for me was fine....Can anyone help clarify? I’m resllt struggling as I like this guy a lot and hoping he can look past it. 
    • bluebell87
      nah, i downloaded an app for a day but there wasn’t anyone in my area, i’m not from a small town or anything . im not really a fan tbh 
×

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.