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Apple Pie

New to HSV-2 life, new to the forum

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Apple Pie

I just found out I have HSV-2. I've been trolling the threads on the forum for the last few days, so thought I'd finally say hello. I'm still confused and unsure of what will come next for me. I'm separated but dating and I'm not sure how I got it yet. I assume from my current bf, but he has yet to be tested. I guess I could have caught it somewhere else along the line and am only now having my first (very painful) outbreak as a result of some recent stress. So far my bf has been very supportive. I hope for his sake he doesn't have it, but we will no doubt break up if this is the case, so I feel more stress thinking about being alone, too.

The stigma associated with herpes leaves me without the will to discuss having it with my friends or family, so I am thankful to have found this forum.

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wakingdream

Welcome. I, too, have just found out that I'm HSV+ and this forum has been a lifeline.

Don't take it for granted that you'll break up if your boyfriend turns out not to have HSV. This isn't something you asked for, and it doesn't change who you are. If he truly cares for you he'll stick around and make it work; if he runs, he would have found a reason to run somewhere along the line anyway and you'll be lucky to have found out now.

Don't stress about being alone. Stress will only make your OB worse. This isn't a life sentence, it's just an obstacle. And, considering the possibilities, quite a manageable one.

The social stigma around herpes sucks, but don't give it power over your own thoughts. Society believes so many things that aren't true; don't allow its wrongheadedness to infiltrate your mind or self-perception. Telling my mother was the best thing I've done since I found out I had HSV. Turns out she knows plenty of people living with the virus, happy and otherwise quite healthy. Sharing your burden almost always makes it lighter--I don't know your friends or family, but I feel fairly confident that if they love you, they'll make you feel better, even if it's terrifying telling them.

Most of all, keep your chin up! I've been trying to think of it as having chronic acne. Sucks, might not look very nice, can be painful and embarrassing, but in the end it's just a skin condition.

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Apple Pie

Thank you for your positive spin, Wakingdream. I look forward to getting to a place where I too can see through the cloud of confusion. I feel like ones I'm through this first OB that I may just wake up one day clear headed. I hope, at least.

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question24

Hi sry to hear your story I am also diagnosed hsv2 im 24. I understand the shock and fear you have. Honestly the hard part of having hsv2 is you can have it for years never know or have an outbreak. Im glad your boyfriend is supporting you and I hope he continues no matter what his results are. It's important to know that you are NOT worthless and this could happen to anyone. Trust me I know, I only been with one guy and I have it. If you cant find the support from your family you will find it on this site. Im fairly new here and this site was very helpful. I would feel so alone without it. If you ever need to talk let me know. Everything will get better.

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Apple Pie

I am feeling better about things. My doctor made me feel better, although she is giving out old information. I'm in Asia and she said HSV-2 is common here and I can see why, since she told me I couldn't pass it on to anyone unless I had lesions at the time. I told her I'd read otherwise elsewhere but she said it wasn't possible. She gave me meds and a cream which are helping to clear the OB though. I haven't worked out in over a week though and that has been a toll on my mental health. I look forward to the OB clearing and being able to exercise again!

My boyfriend has continued to be a huge support. No complaint is too small for him to hear. He still hasn't been tested, but plans to be this week. We slept in the same bed over the weekend and he didn't treat me like the lepor I felt like. He hugged me and ask what was safe for us to do. Today he even asked what precautions we'll need to have sex when I feel up to it again. I just keep telling him to go and get tested. I feel like he's resigned to the idea that he must have it too, when from what I've read it could easily just be me who has it. In which case I think we should break up ... I don't want to pass this on to anyone.

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