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Me and Doctor Large.


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Howdy everyone, this is a greeting/rant. I have never told any one my story so this is a big thing to get off my chest. I'll try to keep it brief.

Me and my girlfriend of the time were doing what 16 year olds of the opposite gender do when there alone, (HAVE HOT MONKEY SEX if you don't get where I'm getting!), when to my surprise I felt a bee sting on the tip of Dr. Large.(aka Mr. Penis) After thinking that it would be way too kinky for my girl to insert a bee into her lunch box, I reasoned that the pain must have come from the stubble resulting from the recent shaving of her lunch box. When the monkey sex was finished, I examined Dr. Large and was shocked to find three small bumps on his head. Girlfriend saw them as well. Then she said,

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry. They told me I couldn't give it to you."

I politely told her to get the f*ck out of my f*cking house.

The next day me and Girlfriend took a trip to the local STD clinic. I showed a real Doctor the bumps on Dr. Large's head. The real Doctor said, "I don't know what that is...", and then brought in several other Real Doctors. After giving me a healthy dose of terror and embarrassment the other Doctors shrugged their heads and mumbled in confused tones. Then they gave me a powder to mix with water saying,

"this should take care of it, if you have anything to begin with. But if it comes back, you return here ASAP!"

The powder water tasted like lime but made me sick as a dog for the rest of the day.

The bumps vanished within a week.

Me and Girlfriend returned to hot monkey sex.

Six months later the bumps returned. I went back to the STD clinic. And the EXACT SAME THING HAPPENED WITH THE DOCTORS. Except this time the powder water didn't make me sick.

Went home.

Bumps vanished.

Monkey Sex.

Bumps return.

That cycle kept repeating for a little over 3 years after the first incident. I was never officially diagnosed but I know what it is. At 18 me and Girlfriend split and I haven't had sex since. I would never want to spread this. I'm 22 now.

I'm terrified of hospitals now after being poked and examined for so long. I'm also under developed in relations with the opposite sex since I have shut myself off from them.

(sorry i lied, that wasn't short at all.)

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Hey - we're the same age. Funny post, I enjoyed reading it. It sucks how you got it... because she could have prevented it. I'm sorry. Like many of us here, we didn't get a choice in the matter... sigh.

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thats kind of funny. i always like peoples terms for their genitals.

everyone is "under developed" in relationships, if 1 person knew exactly what to do that would just be pretty freaky. being confused is ok. youve got years to work on it so you can sit on your porch w/ your woman and have her bring you some more ice tea.

and by the way, nothing is worse then having duck lips shoved inside you. then forced open, and having very very long qtips scrape you. i would love to just wip out a penis, then having to do that every year.

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