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I am amazed,,,,,,,,,,,


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OK, so I've been celibate since my contraction of herpes and my divorce 3 years ago (yeap my cheatin', prostitute getting ex-husband gave it to me). I figured its MUCH easier just to NOT have to deal with the whole dating and telling people you have herpes, etc. So I chose to just put a wall up, turn off my inner emotions and just not date. And I have been doing just fine, I keep busy, have alot of friends, etc.

WELL, I met a guy a while back and we have been friends, keeping in contact, etc. He lives out of town. I knew I was attracted to him, but again, never let on that I was due to my little wall I built. Well, recently he told me he was attracted to ME, and I had to admit I was attracted to him. Something inside me said, GOD just give the poor guy a chance and TELL him the truth. I told him EVERYTHING over dinner, that my ex-husband had cheated on me in our 4 month marriage, gave me herpes, etc. I told him I take valtrex and get an OB maybe 2 times per year at this point, etc. I then kind of stopped talking and looked up at his face, and he looked like he was going to cry. Then I got emotional because this is the first time I had actually told a potential guy I liked that I had herpes. I started crying myself.

He said he was very sorry that happened to me, it wasn't my fault, and he was SURE there was a 'way around it'. He didn't run out or get the check or leave as I had envisioned a guy would. I told him I wanted him to read all about herpes and educate himself, and that I would print out some stuff for him to read. He said that would be great. So I did that,,,,,,,,,it felt very uncomfortable to me, but I gave him the papers I had printed off the internet and some links for him to go to.

He said he wasn't worried about getting it, and that he just liked me too much to care. He said him stopping smoking (which I told him I couldn't deal with a smoker, lol) was more of an issue than the herpes,,,,,,,,,,,

I must say, I am amazed by this. He never questioned it or acted repulsed at any time, he just said 'what can we do to be safe about it',,,,,,,,,,,

I guess you just have to give people a chance to accept you, because I guess I really AM worth 'the risk'. This whole thing is kind of a test that is very telling of how someone feels about you,,,,,,,,,if they take off and you never see them again, well, they just wanted to get LAID,,,,,,,if they hang around and want to learn about it and STILL be with you, then they like you for YOU.

God does things for a reason,,,,,,,,,,,,,,I guess he gave me herpes so I could weed out the idiots, lol....................

we'll see what happens from here, but YES we DID have sex, using a condom and of course my daily valtrex, and its been 3 years since I"ve had sex, so this guy may have awoken a beast, lol............


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The same senbtiments get echoed ere

if they are worth it, it wont bother them!!! if they run a mile, then they wasnt worth it, and its a good thing they did!

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    • CHT
      Hello "FeelingLost".... your fears and concerns are understandable but, nothing you've described regarding the sexual encounter would cause you to contract herpes.... further, your symptoms are not herpes related.  Best of all, your doctor is correct, your results don't show any herpes here.  You can relax.... definitely have your GP take a look at things and see what might be causing the symptoms but, again, none of them are typical herpes related.  I wish you the best in terms of talking to your wife about this encounter.... hopefully she will understand and you both can work through this amicably.  We all make mistakes.... be careful not to beat yourself up too hard over this.... you can become so racked with guilt that you start imagining physical symptoms.  Best of luck.... and take care..... come back to the site if you have questions.
    • FeelingLost75
      Hi (I’m really scared and feel really disappointed in myself and worried about my future), I had oral sex with a condom almost 3 weeks ago and a massage parlor. I also received a hand job at the same time prior to putting a condom on, also may have rubbed my penis on her back a little. Did not touch her genitals I don’t recall any sores on her back. After the event she handed me a pice of TP and after I took off the condom I wiped my penis head to clear away the excess ejaculation…this is where I suspect I got infected, she had just gone pee and wiped and maybe touched a sore or something and then I got it on my penis from the tp? Idk. I’m just flailing.   After this I’ve had discomfort on the skin below the head of my penis and 4 bumps for 2 weeks now, the bumps don’t seem to have changed in size. I also had frequent urination for about a week and have had dull pain in my groin on and off. I also have some pins and needles on the sides of my abdomen/trunk that get worse when I go out in the heat or get dehydrated. I’ve had a lot of trouble sleeping, likely due to guilt and shame and worry about the future.   so I got one test done at 10 days from the event (idk know if this can tell me anything… the doctor assured me it was 100% correct and I don’t have herpes. I was not physically examined). I got a full panel std. neg for everything. HSV-1 results: IgG 0.3 / HSV-2 IgG 0.9 hsv-1 IgM = 2.2 hsv-2 IgM = 3.0 (Reference V. Negative: Less than 9.0 Borderline: 9.0 to 11.0 Positive: Greater than 11.0) I have an appointment with my GP on Thursday, hoping he can help. Will likely go to a std testing service tomorrow to see if I can get in an antiviral proactively. Plan to get tested again this week.    
    • TS4real
    • FeelingLost75
      How are you doing now?
    • TS4real
      May 13 ( day I will never forget).. a guy I was dating and I drank way to much and decided to have anal sex. We did use protection however, not enough lube, wasn’t done correctly and it was painful. So bad that I yelled out and fell off the bed. Anyway, oral was also performed on me anal and vaginal. Flash forward to 3-4 days after that. I was in the most intense pain I had ever felt. I went to a gyn she tool one look and said it looks like herpes. She swabbed me . 2 days after that, yes it’s HSV1 . I was still in pain, irritated anal area and vaginal area and It was unbearable.  today, I still have irritation and itchy and when I pass a bowel i’m in pain and the itch is crazy.     When I first was diagnoses the gyn gave me valtrex which I did not take bc I was in so much pain I could not move for 2 days.  Groin lymphs were swollen I had fever , tired etc.  I am wondering if I had taken the valtrex would it have kinda liked stopped the virus in it’s tracks enough to reproduce? Do people see a correlation between no more outbreaks and immediate initial valtrex  use ? I am 43, I never thought this wound happen as I am not a promiscuous person, I hardly date and I always use protection when I do have intercouse , have yearly std tests. I’m just so sad that i’m at this point right now . I’m trying not to get depressed but this is making my body feel miserable. I’m an avid runner and biker and mom of two teens. I feel like my life as I knew is over. I want to feel better already.
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