Varivax Vaccine update: It's been a couple of weeks and I have had one of the worst outbreaks to date. I'm hoping it is my body having something like Herxheimer reaction which means it's going to get worse before it gets better. I'll keep you posted.
Thanks for the replies.
She has type 2 which she contracted during an experiment with anal sex 20 years ago. She is on Valtrex and hasn't had an outbreak in 2 years. Since the time she contracted it, she's married for 12 years and gave birth to her now 15 year old daughter, and she tells me she has never passed it on to anyone else. (She did not contract it from her ex-husband)
I spoke to my doctor who tells me the suppressive therapies these days are so good, that statistically i have about a 1:100,000 chance of contracting it unprotected and about a million to one chance if I use condoms as long as she isn't having an outbreak.
I'm not sure I'm looking for answers here, just maybe trying to gain some understanding, including what this is like for her. She disclosed all of this to me early on in our relationship and has been very forthcoming and open so I trust her completely.
There is great information here, but quite honestly, most of it is catering to those who have the virus and so you may read a lot of stuff that probably isn't relevant to you and which might 'scare' you unnecessarily.
Aside from knowing how to best reduce the risks of transmission and what the risks are (which Lisa has covered above), there is not too much else that would be of great benefit to you. Be careful not to get into analysis paralysis from information overload.
I wish you both well
A little update. I took everyone's advice. I ended up having a talk with him because after spending more time together I could see things going somewhere. He was actually very understanding and non judgmental. He knows someone who has it so he is familiar with the virus. I feel a million times better. I feel like a weight was lifted off my chest. I do however feel lucky to have been able to have such a good first conversation on the topic. I know that is not always the case. After this, I have decided I will not let fear take over.
Do you know which type she has? Given that she's had it for about 20 years and if she suppresses the virus very well as in has not had any outbreaks for a while she is pretty low risk. If she uses medication and you use condoms that brings that down to about 2% risk at any rate. But you'll get some good information here and ask questions if you have any but I guess you always have to keep in mind that there is a risk and you have to be prepared to take it.
Glad I found this forum!
I started dating a wonderful gal about 6 weeks ago and on our 4th date she revealed to me that she contracted herpes about 20 years ago. We haven't been intimate, yet, partly because of timing and partly because of my hesitancy. I'm going to peruse the forum some before I ask any specific questions but thanks in advance!
Some people just get very different symptoms. All as I know for me is that they become itchy and scab a certain way that is different to a pimple. . And they do hurt differently to a pimple that scabs and get sore. Usually they will appear in the same spot but can be in a different area within the genital region. I guess I wouldn't worry too much because if it does come up to be a herpes outbreak it certainly won't be as bad as your first outbreak and you can treat it pretty quickly with antivirals or just let it heal itself whistle tea tree oil for example but if you're in a relationship you do want to be aware of what is viral shedding and what is a normal itch. . Look at it is going to turn into an outbreak it won't be as bad as your first and also you Can Heal it pretty quickly with antiviral meds or even applying tea tree oil for example but if you were in a relationship you need to be aware that it could be viral shedding. Eventually you will get to know your own symptoms