cannot stop blaming myself

[nemo]

I was told new years eve 2005 that I have herpes... I feel like I am alone b/c I dealing with this on my own... its very hard when there's no support.. It makes me sad to think I have to deal with this the rest of my life... Recently I have met this great guy but don't know how he will react or if he stay around.. how do you tell someone that you have herpes?

[Shayna]

Hi nemo,

Welcome...I have found there to be a community here of people who can help in many ways. Read as many of the posts that you can throughout the board. It's full of questions and answers. Some people who have lived with herpes a long time post their experiences which can be quite helpful.

The good news here is that you are definately not alone! There are people with lots of good advice and wisdom on this forum.

I am new to this myself and haven't been in the position yet to have to tell someone I'm interested in that I have herpes. There is a portion on this board that discusses that very subject. Hopefully you can read through some of the posts there and glean from them.

Take care and be good to yourself

[fuller]

I donno if this helps at all but I was first diagnosed a year and a half ago. I started taking vatrex daily and it really helped my outbreaks and made me feel a million times better. I barley got them after that. Anywase at the time I had just met a really great guy after going through a very rough ordeal and wasn't sure what to do either. Even though it was teh first day we met it was a very long initmate night of great conversation and we were having so much fun. Then he tried to kiss me and I froze up completley. I just looked at him right away and said " Is it okay for me to tell you something very hard to talk about. Something a bit embarrassing for me that I need you to be very understanding about? " He said he wouldn't tell anyone and that I could tell him. So I just kind of blurted it out and explained how it happened and how I'de not been dealing with it too well. I also explained about the new medication I was on and how it helped so immensly. I told him the basic thing I knew about the virus that most peopel who don't have it don't know. He had a coupel questions and I answered. He didn't know what to think of it at first but he was very sweet and understanding. He really appreciated my honesty and how hard it was to tell him. He said it really helped him judge who I REALLy was as a person. It worked out for me becuase we ended up living togther, getting engaged, and now I am currently 39 weeks pregnant with our first child in that short amount of time. He fell in love with me for me, and it was the best feeling knowing I had nothign to hide from him like I felt I did from the rest of the world. He gets me through the really hard days. I appreciate my lfie so much now. So I just wante dto say there is HOPE. That somewhere someone isn't going to judge us as harshly as we do ourselves. It's all about your attitude I think. You need to have confidense and love yourself no matter what even when it's hard to do. We are worth it. We are not bad people, and we are not dirty. We are just people, and people are just people. And yeah there are some good ones out there left. I really hope things work out for you, bu if they don't at first just don't loose hope.

[jaemld]

that was an amazing story! Im glad for people like you who give hope to everyone who hasnt quite gotten to that point! best wishes!