angry and confused

[bluefrog]

I was just diagnosed with genital herpes. I have a new partner and about 11-13 days after intercourse for the first time together, I had three pimples near my vagina. I was also sore and very uncomfortable, felt as if my pelvis was broken. I immediately made a doct. appt., but got my period, so by the time they could reschedule me the pimples were gone. the doct. recommended blood work, and i agreed. He has since called me and told me the results were positive. Could the herpes be from my current, new partner? I have never in my life had, seen or felt anything like this on my body. I am still uncomfortable, still itchy and still sore most of the time and it has been since the first week of april. I am so angry and so confused and feel that my sex life is ruined. I have no desire to have sex and don't ever want to fall in love again for fear of embarrasment when i tell my future new partner that i have herpes.

[gutted.]

so u had a blood test? im think (im not sure) that it normally takes quite a while for antibodies to show up in your blood, a few months, and blood test look for those antibodies to determine if your a carrier.

so i would say u already had it.

dont take that as gospel, like i stated im not 100% sure when it comes to bloodtests.

however those test have been known to be wrong.

normally if u have sores they do a culture test on those sores.

anyho -

dont think your lifes over, is far from over, ive had it since 2005, dont get many outbreaks, and it hasnt affected my role in partner finding, as after ive told partners they have still wanted to go out with me.

its very hard for the first few months, cumming to terms with it all, but you will,,, also you will find once a partner is told, most are very understanding and supportive - unless u date losers? and which, from now on i wouldnt waste your time with.

[bluefrog]

i had the pimples on april 1st, the blood work done on april27th, for both 1 and 2. doc. said i was positive for both and had it more than 5 weeks??? i had sex with this guy for the first time on march 21st. so, i had it before i was with him? why did i never have an ob? does this mean that he has it now? he said he was going to get bloodwork done, but has not done so yet.

[gutted.]

i cant say for sure. im not a doctor...

id possible try to tell by the way he took the news, if he shrugs his shoulders then id guess he knew he had it, if he goes mad then poss he didnt know he had it or doesnt have it....

both one and two? oral herpes (hsv1) (coldsores) can be passed on by oral sex. but both 1 and 2 can be caught orally and genitally

even by touching a coldsore then touching yourself down there can tranmitt the virus.

its more then likely he gave it to you, but that cant be certain

some people have it over 10 years before then have an outbreak.

as for him having it, unless he has an OB or has bloodwork done, u cant really tell

[bluefrog]

he did not freak out and has been very supportive even though i told him i will not have sex anytime soon. i am waiting for him to get his bloodwork done. why am i still uncomfortable and itchy? it has been 6 full weeks???? can i shave?

[gutted.]

well people with coldsores shave and dont spread it around thier face, so i think so, but this little virus works in mysteroius ways sumtimes!

just be careful around your sores.

as for being itchy - thats the virus allright.....

im a bloke, so cant really say how to sort a vagina out in with this affliction

[Caliope]

bluefrog - I'm assuming you have had a genital ob - if you aren't having any symptoms of an active ob you may be okay to shave the bikini area. Don't shave during one because it could cause it to spread by getting the virus on the razor and the microscopic abrasions from the razor open the skin.

Some people report that this can cause an ob. I've been okay when there is no ob in sight and I'm careful. Use a fresh clean razor and then throw it out just to be on the safe side.

[bluefrog]

thank you c.

bad enough we have to deal with this but to not be able to continue our personal hygiene routines too...ugh, this sucks

[Caliope]

I've often wondered if shaving makes it easier to get hsv first because shaving causes abrasions and second because the hair is somewhat like a barrier, at least for some of us. I guess it depends of the location of the infection.

I do like to keep things looking nice. It's goofy because my current bf, who I'll keep forever if he'll let me, is the one who compliments me the most and requests the least.

[bluefrog]

is your current bf infected? if not, do you always use protection when having sex? how did you tell him?

[Caliope]

bluefrog -

I don't know if my bf has hsv or not. It is a long complicated story involving both of us having tests that were negative.

He refuses to use condoms but I take Acyclovir 3 times a day. The daily suppressive dose is 2 times a day but it didn't stop the itch etc so I take more. I also take vitamin supplements to lessen ob's and have a fairly strict diet avoiding trigger foods.

I've had 3 ob's total.

[bluefrog]

in what length of time have you had 3 obs? since i was just diagnosed and had my first ob, my doc recommended not using a daily remedy, but rather contact him if I have another ob. I am going to order vitamins tonight and I start drinking a dannon with l. casei once a day. My problem and discomfort: since my first sign of an ob which was on april 1st, 2007, i still do not feel "normal". my vagina is always sore and/or itchy. I get flu like cramps and pains in my legs, and it actually feels like my pelvis is broken sometimes when i sit on the toilet. any suggestions??????

[Caliope]

This is weird.

I had a very tiny ob in April 2005 (1 sore). A major ob in January 2007 that seemed to go away but not completely and seemed to spread but not with outright blisters etc. more like a raw feeling from vagina all the way to my butt crack. It stayed sore and irritated until the first week in March. I started taking the antivirals at the end of February and it is part of what really helped me. My body just didn't know what to do it seems.

The last I will call an ob but it was really odd as well. Around the middle of April 2007 I was major stressed at work and it started with pinching sensations in my vaginal area, my head started to ache for days and then my back started to be really bad and I upped the antivirals and within two days all was fine again.

[bluefrog]

Dear Caliope, I must thank you for all of your responses. I still have so many concerns and so many questions....... when I was diagnosed, the thought of passing herpes to my family never, ever crossed my mind. The more i read posts here, the more I realized that a simple kiss or sip from their coffee coolata could be devastating. We are such a close family and hugs and kisses are daily. I now turn my mouth away from my kids and feel so sad. I feel like my life is ruined. Also, I keep reading that the prescription meds seem to help most. I have not felt "normal" since my ob which occurred on april 1, 2007. The tingling, the itching, the soreness, muscle spasms in my legs, etc. I just cannot stand it. How do I adjust and accept this condition without going totally crazy???

[annyi]

This is only my experience so far... I feel it is the open wound that easily contract virus. I had a stubbon pimple nearby my blisters for a few months wihtout getting infected, later, one time I was rubbing the scab using a lot of ointment, the pimple was broken. And two days later, it became a blister. Another case was, I had a tiny small cut on my little finger during an ob, and later I feel that stinging pain like a lot of people discribed here on the exact site. Right now during an ob, I check all the small scratches and papercuts all over my body, and cover them with waterproof band-aids when I wash. My question is though, virus can only live in a living, then why the flu virus can stay on door knobs? Is the soap I used safe for later use?

[bluefrog]

annyi,

i wonder the same thing; i do use antibacterial soap, but they say that the herpes virus does not live on surfaces, towels, etc. dunno, but i sure wish there was some miracle that could make this all go away!