Eeep

[feather]

Jeeze, the more and more I read and find out I'M starting to get really truley nervous. I'm PRETTY sure I don't have herpes but never got tested, but I HAVE had weired things I think were acne. do people GET acne there? Should I get tested to be sure? I never even thought about any of this untill I met the guy I'm sorta seeing and he told me he has it. I didn't know obgyn's don't regularly check this at annuals. Is it possible I'm being paranoid? Please someone give me an opinion, I'm totally new to any of this and not feeling reassured at all. I saw pictures and they scared me really bad. even if I don't he still does, and I feel TERRIBLE because some small part of me feels terrified AND kinda grossed out. I know it's a knee-jerk reaction. What's the best way to overcome these feelings? He's SO nice and sweet I don't wanna hurt his feelings, but I'm still scared. I'm afraid reacting this way makes me narrow-minded....

[WaxedWrong]

well i cant really tell u if its herpes or not as you didnt say more then it looks like acne, and you didnt mention where its happening.

so with that- yes, you can have acne anywhere on your body. face, neck, back, chest, arms, butt, even around your genitals. but inside your genitals, like the inside of your labias ~ thats probably not acne.

herpes, can look like pimples, white bumps, red bumps, little cuts, sores, etc etc etc. if you arent 100% sure its acne, which you dont sound like you are- you should def get tested to be sure. and put your fears aside.

fyi, they usually put the very worst pictures on the internet - so everything out there is not always what people experience themselves.

sure you have a right to be afraid and feel grossed out, but you have to suck it up. because no one has the right- to treat someone like they are worse then you, or disgusting because they are diffrent. it shows how ignorant that person is if they do.

do your reading, get educated on the virus, all aspects of it- the more you know- the better off you will be. hell even make a list of questions, or something that you want to know and dont be afraid to ask him, or look online for them. and rem that if you really want to be with him communicate how this makes you feel. the only way you 2 can over come this, is to talk it out.

[feather]

Hm.

I'm TRYING to get the info, that's why I came here. I dont want to be narrow or anything, but I feel so akward asking. I know he must feel that way too, having it and having to tell me. And I don't look down on him AT ALL. I Think He's brave for telling me. I gotta have respect for it. I'm glad that the pictures out there aren't what it's ALWAYS like. Why would they only post up the super scary pics? That really doesn't HELP anyone...

[WaxedWrong]

to scare people? i know if i saw a picture of herpes when i was looking around and only found a bunch of 1 tiny dots, or cuts i would have completly overlooked what i had. but then again, the pics that i did see were fucking scary- and i was going well... my crotch doesnt look that bad.

i rem sex ed- they found some of the most disgusting pics you couldnt even imagine.

well ask away, thats what we are here for- also theres some pretty good sites that give info, i suggest that you only use the ones that have a .org .gov .edu ending in there name, those are sites you can really count on as good sources, and the people who write the articles can be found, unlike a "herpesbegone.com" kind of site, where it can be biased, misinformed, and anyone can contribute to it without being a reliable source.

[feather]

Thank you so much for helping me to find out about this. the more I learn the less scary it is...Knowing it's the same virus I have (orally) just somewhere else makes it less intimidating. Since I have the oral virus that means i should have more antibodies and that would help my chances too, right? I mean, I feel better and better about this whole thing. It's not a virus that makes a person anyway...

[WaxedWrong]

yes, if you already have the virus, your body makes it alot harder to get reinfected.

[feather]

You know, We've finally been intimate on a smaller scale, (oral) and I don't know why, but somewhere in the back of my mind I still had doubts, like I expected scars or something. I know now I was silly to be afraid. I feel totally reassured now. Thanks so much everyone who posted replies to me. And I hope everyone's everything goes really well. I'm not scared anymore and you all helped me with that. And so did my (now) boyfriend! I learned that's it's more just an inconveniance with a nasty stigma. I"m still gonna go get myself tested just for peace of mind, but I'm not worried. Gotta be responsible ya know. I even got to educate a few of my own family members on the matter, and they're behind us, too! Thanks again all,

Feather

[always searching]

You are truly a great person. I am glad you were able to see past the stigma and accept the person. Is your boyfriend on suppressive meds? I was reading that with the suppressive meds and using condoms the chance of transsmission when not having an ob is really, really low. Something like 1 - 2%.

And yeah, those pics on the internet are scary as hell!

[feather]

Yes, he's on suppresive meds. So, I'm not worried. He's been super responsible about everything. And I think HE's the truly great person, not me. We gotta slow things down because of his job and stuff, but I'm willing to wait. He's totally worth it!