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So how do you learn to love your vagina again?

art87

By art87
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art87 Honeycomb Member

art87

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I'm newly diagnosed. Found out a week ago today. GHSV1. Told my partner, it went a lot smoother than I could have imagined. My only thing is, is I'm not sure he is a forever kind of partner. I'd like him to be and who knows where it will go. But for now, I'm unsure as to what the future holds. So I've seen quite a few of you say that you do learn to love your vagina again. One question that I hope you all can answer, or provide guidance, is how did you get there? I feel blessed that the first and only person I told was beyond cool about it. But what happens when that doesn't work out and I have to tell someone else someday. My ob is gone, thankfully cleared quickly with a cycle of acyclovir, but I was not put on it as a maintenance. My doc said Hsv1 is the less severe of the 2, and could be years before my next ob. I'm all for and ENFORCING protection going forward. But how do you feel sexy again. All the time. Does it ever go away? I have this lingering thought in my head that I am much less desirable now even though he's ok with it. FYI we have done "it" since my ob and he was absolutely fine. This is just me in my own head. Any advice is greatly appreciated. I just want to love my body again. Herpes and all. :(

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art87 Honeycomb Member

art87

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Does it ever go away?

FYI I didn't mean does the herpes ever go away lol, I realized that looked funny after I posted. I meant does this feeling of lingering.. Idk, disgust? Shame? Depression about it? Ever go away?

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Dreamer10 Honeycomb Member

Dreamer10

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Great question! I felt/feel the same way! It's been 3 years and it comes and goes! I was so depressed about it that I stop working out and gained weight in process. So, physically and mental I lost the feeling of being sexy. It was someone I never thought about before because I felt and look great so it was easy to feel sexy. I do feel better about it now and trying to motivate myself to workout to allow the physical get back onboard with the mental. So ... Yes, it will come back

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joeer120 Established Member

joeer120

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FYI I didn't mean does the herpes ever go away lol, I realized that looked funny after I posted. I meant does this feeling of lingering.. Idk, disgust? Shame? Depression about it? Ever go away?

I was told in December that I have hsv 2.... I got really depressed n stopped working out.... I am now feeling better... It takes longer time to think about it...so instead of thinking about it daily I'm down to once a twice a month, I'm lucky enough not to get recognizable outbreaks.. Dk if I ever had an outbreak... What still bothers me is not knowing who it was...

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Dreamer10 Honeycomb Member

Dreamer10

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I was told in December that I have hsv 2.... I got really depressed n stopped working out.... I am now feeling better... It takes longer time to think about it...so instead of thinking about it daily I'm down to once a twice a month, I'm lucky enough not to get recognizable outbreaks.. Dk if I ever had an outbreak... What still bothers me is not knowing who it was...
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Mellisuga Established Member

Mellisuga

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I had a really difficult time with this when I was diagnosed. From my perspective, it takes time. Part of the problem are the symptoms, but when that begins to subside, eventually you reach a point when you feel like you could feel normal again. At this point, you could start working on loving your body for what it is.

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november13 Established Member

november13

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It just takes time. I think once you see how little the virus really affects your life (especially since its type 1) and how great sex still is, you'll feel sexy again.

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  • 3 months later...
Diva78 Honeycomb Member

Diva78

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Great topic, I'm struggling with the same feeling. I recently disclosed to my partner of 6 months and I don't know how you get over constantly thinking about it. The loss of sexual spontaneity. Wondering what your partner is thinking about you. Ugh this virus is making me a head case.  So glad I found this support forum. 

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