Diagnosed yesterday. Who to trust.

[knowyourworth9]

Hi. I was diagnosed yesterday and, of course, was in hysterics. I will give the complete details of my story since so many of yours have been helping me as I am new to this.

I was dating an abusive guy for 9 months. He never told me he had this, or bipolar depression for that matter, and after the breakup (he almost hit me on the 4th of july and was verbally/emotionally abusive) I was ready to move forward with my life. I recently got laid off and the stress was incredible which was when I started noticing a small rash on my buttcheek. I didn't think too much of it since I work out all the time and have been prone to skin irritations. I wound up talking to another guy during this time (and mind you, I never have sex outside of a relationship) but this one time I made the exception. Days later I noticed this rash wasn't going away and consulted a doctor which told me on site that it was most likely herpes and gave me a blood test and a Valtrex prescription which I absolutely despise at the moment as it's making me feel even more weak. Anyway, after my appointment, I had to break the news to the guy I had slept with and he was terrified yet pretty understanding and even shared that he had the clap once and had to call 7 people. I also wondered why that still hadn't taught him anything... But here I am, a day later, not communicating with this guy at all and still moving forward with my life in hopes of finding someone that truly respects me more than the respect I had previously not been given. I still feel partially broken but I know this will be for the best. I am coping.

[Evean30]

I am a domestic violence survivor & I can understand what you're going through. Please, please do not let yourself fall into depression. I know it is hard. I was in a 6yr and severely depressed/traumatized to the point it took me 8 yrs to want to try dating again. When I did.. I spent the next 5 making poor dating choices and ended up with HSV. Seek help, whether its through a support group, close friends/family or therapy. My only regret is that I did not want to get help sooner. It does get better! As many have told me... You can still live a normal life & find love. I have many friends & family who have moved on to happier lives despite having hsv. It is what keeps me hopeful. I am currently with a partner who is still with me even after learning my diagnosis. Ofcourse that can end at any time but I remain positive it will work out for the better.

Chin up! ♡

[CuteSabrina]

knowyourworth9, I really liked reading this. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I liked what happened to you, but the way you finish the whole thing. It inspires me to see people who go through so much and yet they still move forward with their lives. You will get through this. It definitely gets better. Take care.

[Createss Galore]

Hi. I was diagnosed yesterday and, of course, was in hysterics. I will give the complete details of my story since so many of yours have been helping me as I am new to this.

I was dating an abusive guy for 9 months. He never told me he had this, or bipolar depression for that matter, and after the breakup (he almost hit me on the 4th of july and was verbally/emotionally abusive) I was ready to move forward with my life. I recently got laid off and the stress was incredible which was when I started noticing a small rash on my buttcheek. I didn't think too much of it since I work out all the time and have been prone to skin irritations. I wound up talking to another guy during this time (and mind you, I never have sex outside of a relationship) but this one time I made the exception. Days later I noticed this rash wasn't going away and consulted a doctor which told me on site that it was most likely herpes and gave me a blood test and a Valtrex prescription which I absolutely despise at the moment as it's making me feel even more weak. Anyway, after my appointment, I had to break the news to the guy I had slept with and he was terrified yet pretty understanding and even shared that he had the clap once and had to call 7 people. I also wondered why that still hadn't taught him anything... But here I am, a day later, not communicating with this guy at all and still moving forward with my life in hopes of finding someone that truly respects me more than the respect I had previously not been given. I still feel partially broken but I know this will be for the best. I am coping.

You sound very strong. I am glad for you that you seem clear-headed, despite the shock. You are already mending in your emotions and your mind. You've found the key of life, to treat others better than we've been treated, if at all possible. Take care!

[knowyourworth9]

I am a domestic violence survivor & I can understand what you're going through. Please, please do not let yourself fall into depression. I know it is hard. I was in a 6yr and severely depressed/traumatized to the point it took me 8 yrs to want to try dating again. When I did.. I spent the next 5 making poor dating choices and ended up with HSV. Seek help, whether its through a support group, close friends/family or therapy. My only regret is that I did not want to get help sooner. It does get better! As many have told me... You can still live a normal life & find love. I have many friends & family who have moved on to happier lives despite having hsv. It is what keeps me hopeful. I am currently with a partner who is still with me even after learning my diagnosis. Ofcourse that can end at any time but I remain positive it will work out for the better.

Chin up! ♡

I feel like it happened for a reason. And I love how positive you are, it makes me feel a lot better:)

[knowyourworth9]

You sound very strong. I am glad for you that you seem clear-headed, despite the shock. You are already mending in your emotions and your mind. You've found the key of life, to treat others better than we've been treated, if at all possible. Take care!

Thankyou beautiful soul, I honestly feel like since I was clearly putting so many others ahead of myself, I contracted this in order to help me focus and remain focused on myself. I feel like developing this was necessary for me because as a result of the abuse I could've quickly turned to more self-destructive patterns and could've easily led to the option of much more negative things to occur. I feel blessed as far as the placement of my HS and as far as the life lesson I'm receiving goes. I know I'm going to feel undesirable sometimes, but who doesn't? A real man, who respects me will understand me on this and that's exactly what I deserve in my life from here on.

[JBnATL]

Days later I noticed this rash wasn't going away and consulted a doctor which told me on site that it was most likely herpes and gave me a blood test and a Valtrex prescription which I absolutely despise at the moment as it's making me feel even more weak.

Visual diagnosis is the least accurate way to diagnose someone. Did your doctor also do a swab test? If you recently acquired this virus you can still test negative in a blood test because the blood tests look for antibodies in your blood and it can take your immune system up to 4 months to create them. So until you build up the antibodies you can have a negative blood test but still have this virus. Also a blood test cannot tell you where you have the virus, so if you do test positive for hsv1 you could have always had it oral and that rash is not herpes. 90% of all adults have hsv1 so you may have had that all along.

There are so many other things that can cause rashes. I have been on this website daily for over 6 years and I wish I had a $ for ever person I met here who was POSITIVE they had herpes and later found out they did not.

Here is a link to a posting here that talks about what else is commonly confused with herpes:

http://www.herpes-coldsores.com/conditions_confused_with_herpes.htm

I hope to see you in chat again soon!