Dental dam recommendations?

[Maeby]

Hello,

I have G-HSV1 and I'm trying to persuade a loving boyfriend to go downtown.  I'd like to try it with a dental dam to ease any fears he has.  I know the nature of a dam is to be a barrier and will dull the sensation, but anything is better than nothing!  lol 

Does anyone have recommendations for a dental dam brand?  I saw very little on Amazon.

Thanks!

[blue84]

 I think I wouldn't force him to do something he doesn't want to...if you luv him u should not let do that stuff..we all know that h1 or h2 is pretty dam bad if it stuck with it for life..

[WilsoInAus]

There is no need for a dental dam for HSV-1. He probably already has HSV-1 and the odds of infection in that direction are low to non existent.

[Sanguine108]

There is no need for a dental dam for HSV-1. He probably already has HSV-1 and the odds of infection in that direction are low to non existent.

Hahaha, but if he does get it then be sure to report it back to us!

Yeah, it's smart to ease his fears.   It's one thing to have HSV1 genital but to ignorantly spread HSV1 orally isn't really that great.   Yes you desire some oral, but he clearly is apprehensive about getting what doesn't flourish genitally but does orally on him...   Use the dental dam to be safer.  I'm sure you can figure out more creative ways that makes things just as safe for him and more sensation for you.   And if he decides to throw out the dental dam and just go out it then great!   But don't assume anything.  Nobody knows your body on this forum.  Nobody knows how you, as a part of the population, falls into shedding or suppressing the virus.   The statistics are wacky and there's every statistic and opinion out there that one person can spin this virus in whatever way they want.  Nobody really knows.  This is a constant theme in medicine where the general consensus epidemiological/statistical PhDs are saying one thing, that gets published but then those in the field/clinicians are seeing something different.   Clinicians see the exceptions more often than the PhD.   But with HSV being one of the most searched STD on the internet, you're bound to find whatever you want to support whatever view you have.

[musumegirl]

I would give him some stats on the likelihood of transmitting ghsv1 to ohsv1. Very minimal. Plus, I gotta be honest. I've never had anyone deny oral and I have ghsv1. I guess in my mind when you disclose you are pretty much signing up for everything and anything. I couldn't live without oral sex. 

[WilsoInAus]

What does it matter if he becomes infected? Is it a crime?

Every minute in the world, 50 mothers infect their babies with HSV-1. According to Sanguine they should immediately report this to the authorities and surrender for detention and execution!

Who cares, life is way too short for such nonsense. Just get on with enjoying sex and if this man won't go down on you find one who will.

Edited October 2, 2015 by WilsoInAus

[Sanguine108]

I'm not down to play a slanderous game or the whacky statistic game.  Clearly, we have different beliefs.  You're biased by your infancy infection of HSV-1 by your mother.  And I, as an adult, have been infected with HSV-1 both orally and genitally.  I experience/d what it is like to go through that infection on both fronts!  As a health care worker, I am biased.   And now, 7 months in, I'm amazed by how clear things are.  There are still things that pop up and are annoying... but you have not had that opportunity, in this lifetime, to compare before and after.   How can you relate when you don't know what it feels like down below?  How can you put down and dismiss people's suffering?!

I don't think people should shut themselves off from the world but that people should enhance their honoring each other.  So many people infect others, some knowing some unknowingly, and so much pain and torment results.  And a lot of times, it was a short-term fling that was carried away by some lust.  Suffering is unnecessary but if when people think with their genitals, it's a common occurrence. In the name of that high love, hsv is not a problem but for lustful desires it's a mixed bag.

[WilsoInAus]

Well first off it is questionable that you have any herpes and certainly not genital. It is important to honour people with that statement as you suggest.

All the more important to do so with fallacious statements like so much pain and suffering. That just fuels the stigma. On a world scale HSV causes next to no pain and suffering. This is not to dismiss it but to characterise the true face of it.

it is irrelevant as to how one obtains herpes, the mechanics and the virus are identical.it is not relevant whether it is your mother or a lover or how old you are.

Edited October 3, 2015 by WilsoInAus

[Mellisuga]

Uhhh...getting back to the original question...

There's actually a way to cut a condom to make a dental dam So...get your favorite condom, and get crafty!

[WilsoInAus]

Well I think the original question should be challenged. Why even use something for oral sex with genital HSV-1 when there is as low as zero chance of infection. It's very disconcerting for our female readers with genital HSV-1 and infers that men won't go down on women with HSV ... Well we do!!!

[lexyz22]

There is no need for a dental dam for HSV-1. He probably already has HSV-1 and the odds of infection in that direction are low to non existent.

In terms of prevalence, HSV-1 takes shape in the oral region, if she had HSV-2 that would be different, the transmission for HSV-2 genital to oral is much lower due to the fact HSV-2 is primarily in the genital region.

That being said, if she wants to protect her boyfriend then let her. Saying "theres no need for a dental dam" is a bit ignorant to her situation really. Dont be offended.

[WilsoInAus]

I think I disagree with this, there is no evidence that genital HSV-1 has a higher tranmission to the oral region during oral sex than HSV-2. Genital HSV-2 sheds up to 10 times as much as genital HSV-1 so this needs to be considered.

Not sure about being ignorant, remember it is not her situation that is the issue but her boyfriend's concerns and potential buy in to the stigma. He is at much risk of being infected with HSV-1 when he receives a kiss from his mother, Aunty Flo, those adorable nieces not to mention that drunk girl at the Christmas party. A dental dam during oral sex doesn't prevent being infected by these people does it? Only a permanent Hannibal Lector mask would do that, wouldn't that be a better suggestion than a dental dam?

Of course not!!!

[blue84]

 i FIND IT funny that you some guys think tis fucking fun to spread blisters and rashes in peoples mouths... TO me its just careless to think that way ...why ruin peoples life ...if they dont feel safe or dont want to do it why rush it ...the whole transmission rates ...arent good for society either ...let me see you walk into a interview with a bunch of  blisters in your mouth and get the job ...

[WilsoInAus]

I'm sorry as an Asperghers person I don't get what is actually funny about spreading HSV, please enlighten me what is funny?

i have been to multiple job interviews with lesions and got a few jobs as have countless of people I have hired. It is no issue. If it is, who'd want a job with such backward thinking people that would drive the company bankrupt anyway.  

[Mellisuga]

Dental dams deserve more love in general, haha

 

It's worth noting that it'd be good to protect herself from whatever is hiding around her partners molars, eh? I'm a fan of reminding anyone with HSV that there are worse things out there. Like asparagus. Why would you want someone to go down on you, if they haven't brushed their teeth? Do you want chunks of that green stuff stuck in between odd spots? It's not always about HSV...

 

Though yes, in this case it is. *sigh* Honestly, there's no reason to not use the dental dam, if it assauges your bf's fears for a bit. I'd bet you $50 that after two tries with the dam, he'd ditch it and just go commando on you.

All the relevant stats have been (kind of) mentioned already - HSV1 doesn't like the genitals, so you hardly shed, blah blah blah.

 

Here's a transmission chart. Yay, charts. https://herpesopportunity.com/downloads/herpes-opportunity-disclosure-handout.pdf

Also - lube. Lube reduces transmission.

[cupcakes12]

On Mon Sep 28 2015 20:04:16 GMT-0400, Maeby said:

Hello,

I have G-HSV1 and I'm trying to persuade a loving boyfriend to go downtown.  I'd like to try it with a dental dam to ease any fears he has.  I know the nature of a dam is to be a barrier and will dull the sensation, but anything is better than nothing!  lol 

Does anyone have recommendations for a dental dam brand?  I saw very little on Amazon.

Thanks!

Hi. Has your boyfriend been tested for hsv1 and 2? Oral hsv1 is pretty common. Most people don't even know they have. Medically speaking hsv1 in general is not very active in terms of shedding in the genital area. Your bf has a greater chance of acquiring hsv 1 from a relative who may have it and doesn't know from a kiss than going down on you. So in a way it is a bit ridiculous. In terms of dental dams, flavored condoms or non microwaveable saran wrap are good cheap options. Hth

Edited November 16, 2015 by cupcakes12
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