Disclosure

[Singlemomoftwo]

Ok so I got diagnosed about 2 mths ago and just got back into the dating scene. Mind you, I'm still getting to know my new body and I know I'm contagious and Will be for the next few months leading up to a year.

I went on a date last night and see there's long term potential. I'm taking it super slow. If I'm not taking daily suppressive therapy (too new) but taking L-Lysene and trying to keep my immune system strong, and use condoms, and not have sex during an outbreak, I believe the chance of transmission is reduced by 30-50%. But what if I don't know I'm having an outbreak? 

[WilsoInAus]

Have you had a positive blood test yet?

Otherwise with HSV-1 and the use of condoms, infection risk is negligible.

[Singlemomoftwo]

"Negligible"?

 

just wondering if I started dating too soon..

[WilsoInAus]

Yes negligible, as low as 1 in 10,000 per episode, and zero if your partner already has the same type of herpes.

Have you confirmed your diagnosis at this stage?

[Singlemomoftwo]

Yes g-HSV 1.

Thank you :)

 

[Singlemomoftwo]

... so even though I've only had it for a couple months? I was dreading the thought of waiting one year to date again - the time to gather enough antibodies to reduce transmission rates ... 

Same answer, Wilsol?

[WilsoInAus]

How was it confirmed, are you sure you don't have an oral infection?

[Singlemomoftwo]

You and I have already texted before and I've noticed that you're really big on confirmations of diagnoses. What I'm looking for is a more human approach to my questions but thanks anyway. I'm sure you mean well

[blue84]

 what good your moving on ...so fast after getting exposed to herpes ...proud of you man ... Just whatever you do use condoms and you be fine ...and be honesty to women and you already seem to have courage to date which is a plus ...and not seat around just keep batting ...and if you streaK OUT no big deal ...you keep batting till you find your true luv or wife ...am very proud of you ...if i was you i would keep slow the first year ....

[Sanguine108]

Asymptomatic shedding is real.  Some people have amazing immune system that are able to stave off and suppress the virus.  Others not so much.

some would argue that spreading g-HSV1 isn't a big deal.   As long as you can sleep soundly at night knowing that you honored others the same as you'd like to be then great.

Adding shiitake mushrooms is a nice food-level way to enhance your immune system.  

Taking something like Echinacea and Goldenseal for a alternating weeks 3-5days on, 1 week off.  do that for a month.  Echinacea enhances the lymphatic circulation and boosts the immune system.  Goldenseal has been found to do nearly everything you'd want it to, but more importantly it literally enhances blood supply to the Spleen.  At the Spleen is where the adaptive immunity taking place so fueling that will fuel your immune system's evolution.  Sources will say not to take goldenseal consecutively for 2 weeks as it can damage mucus membranes... 3-5days on and off is fine though.. 

You can also take a ganoderma/reishi mushroom supplement, which is unlimited goodness. 

A Multivitamin and mineral complex waaaaayy important. Get on that.  Find a good one.  Don't goto wally world for this stuff.  Find a whole food based multi.  And involve a probiotic in your life, if you haven't already.   Yogurt, kefir... whatever.  a healthy gut flora supports a healthy immune system.

[Singlemomoftwo]

Asymptomatic shedding is real.  Some people have amazing immune system that are able to stave off and suppress the virus.  Others not so much.

some would argue that spreading g-HSV1 isn't a big deal.   As long as you can sleep soundly at night knowing that you honored others the same as you'd like to be then great.

 

I plan on disclosing for sure, no ifs and buts

 

[WilsoInAus]

You and I have already texted before and I've noticed that you're really big on confirmations of diagnoses. What I'm looking for is a more human approach to my questions but thanks anyway. I'm sure you mean well

That's the rough end of the pineapple don't you think?

It sometimes appears that I do look to challenge people around confirmation, but that has nothing to do with the confirmation itself but the impact on people's lives. I'll explain more on that below.

The 'human approach' to HSV as you term it is what the majority of people worldwide do. 95% or more of people with HSV simply ignore it. This is neither right nor wrong, moral or immoral, it is simply fact, it is simply human. These people do not let it impact their lives, who they date, they do not disclose, they simply do not let herpes in any way shape their lives. After all, its a microscopic virus and only a short life has been granted to each of us. This is human.

But it isn't 'individual' as each person needs to make their own decisions, regardless of which way 95% of people approach HSV, each of us must reach a conclusion. Your questions are about which way you want to go and I suggest being open to being part of the 95% as well as the 5%.

5% of people let herpes influence their lives in some way. They are angry about their giver, they sweat outbreaks, think lesions are ugly, they take drugs, worry about transmission, narrow their perspective of dating, let herpes reduce their sexual freedom and pleasure etc. My point is that if you are going to be part of the 5%, at least confirm what it is that you have and this will help you deal with things appropriately.

Yes, I have been following your story closely; my understanding is that you have not had a positive swab or blood test at this stage but have inferred certain things from the situation around you. The uncertainties include:

• you aren't sure what if any form of HSV a casual 'punk' partner had or infected you with, it may have been HSV-1, HSV-2 or nothing
• a former partner claims they have genital HSV-1 from you... is he credible? was it from you? was it from your oral or genital infection if so?

Please correct me if this isn't a good summary.

Given this uncertainty, what are you going to disclose? What if you have HSV-2?

Just some other thoughts around disclosure, CMV and EBV cause say 50 times more 'pain and suffering' for people who think of things that way, than HSV-1/HSV-2. What is your CMV/EBV status and how will you disclose this? HPV causes 1,000 times more 'pain and suffering' than HSV-1/HSV-2. What is your HPV status and how will you disclose this?

I hope this helps an understanding of where I come from. You have noted correctly that I ask questions, I enquire. However every question is put forward not so we will know the answer, but to encourage the reader to self relfect and think, if they so wish. It matters not what the question is (about confirmation or something else) just whether it makes people think! That is all I do.

[Singlemomoftwo]

Wow! You hit the nail right on the head! Thank you for clarifying, and I will reflect about this some more... 

My apologies for any offence I've given.

Have a good day!