Changing my name to what now!?!?

[newhere]

So I was dx in early june after being hsv exposed.  I have not had my hsv typed so i dont know but my giver tested postive for hsv2 so thats what i figure.   That was devastating as we all know and it took a long while to emotionally come to grips, but i pretty much have.  I found that riding my horse made me have an ob!  Any one else ever heard of that?  Well the ob are no big deal now, barely noticeable w meds.  But still that reaallly sucks.  i think its just the rhythm and not much to be done with it.  But i've been feeling super depressed, I mean really depressed after kinda getting better for a while, but super tired and forgetful and memory's shot with brain fog.  I was borderline hypothyroid in july and last week new blood tests and i am hypothyroid.  Which is a form of an auto immune disease.  Anitbodies gone wild! so to speak.  Speculating that my hsv infection started it off as i have no other diseases.  While its nice to know that i have something that can hopefully be helped with more freaking meds, again, its just another thing.  my body is falling apart basically.  And i just feel terrible.  My life is basically go to work, go home.   go to work, go home.  I think i have goiter (i like to say it with a new york jewish accent lol) now because my thyroid is actually swollen.  ugh.   Only good news is i do not have hep c nor hiv.  Im well aware it can be worse.  If there is one universal truth in life it is: Things can ALWAYS be worse.  No matter how bad they are.  And that is about the extent of my optimism lately.  It could be worse.  But its not and its this and it STILL sucks.  Now im going to have to deal with stupid drs about this thing on top of feeling like crap.  good grief.  spare me, someone.  somehow.  I feel terrible and i wanted to tell someone, like you all.  Thanks.   For being here.

 

[Sillybrain2]

Hello my sweets. Thank you for taking the time to share your story with us. 

First off can I say horses freak me out, I think that stems from my sister being bit as a kid.  don't let this stinky little virus impact on your hobby, you will find ways to still be able to ride and once your immune system gets used to the virus, it should hopefully all settle down, including your hypothyroid. Do you know if a change to your diet will help with that? Sorry, my advice about all of this is not that great as i am new to it too. 

There are so many great people on this forum, with lots of awesome advice. They say it does get better, I'm early into my diagnosis and I do believe them when they say it is just a blip. Yet to see that though.

i can offer you a big virtual hug though. We all care about you immensely, it's a shame we have to cross paths in such a way but we are all here to support each other.

You're right, it could always be worse and one day we will say that and actually believe it to be true. We may not see that now, but we will

xo

[newhere]

Thanks sillybrain2 - really just sillybrain was taken and so you added the 2?   Lol seriously I feel your cyber hug.  Thank you.  I can confirm it does get better.  I'm 4 months in.  Coping with hsv.  My ob are pretty mild and I'm not dating so I don't have to deal with anyone else.  I am the same person....who keeps having this shitty health happening.  For fucks sake can we just stop getting things body?  Im exhausted from the damn dr appts 

[Sillybrain2]

Haha I was the OG Sillybrain but my account went all spazzy so I had to come back as Sillybrain2.

thank you for saying it does get better, that provides me with hope that I will be ok.

its amazing how something so insignificant can have such an impact on your mental health. It's bullshit.

is your wallet exhausted from the Drs appt too?

i think just knowing you're not alone in this does help just a smidge.

i just discovered tumblr, in particular herpblr and the blogs on there and everyone's approach to this shit thing is amazing. Again, gives me hope I will be me again. Might be worth having a squizz, people might be going through something similar with the autoimmune stuff?

xo

 

[newhere]

Thanks for the tumblr referral... My wallet is ok due to the fact that went max out of pocket for a mini stroke in march, so everything since then is free!  No copay, nothing.  boy its going to be a shock in january when i do have to pay for meds (co pay) and dr visits.  But i shelled out $4000 to earn this right.  Yes its a minor skin condition that happens to not be curable.  BFD Once you let go of society stigma bs, you realize you are the same person.  When people say they are glad they got herpes, i really do not think they are.  I think its like my mom died when i was really young, but it brought me so much closer to my dad than i ever was or would have been.  But i will never say im glad my mom died.  What those people are saying is that they are adults, can actually look at the big picture, find something redeeming in a shitty situation that is permanent, and realize the serendipitous benefits the condition might bring, like screening out assholes and such.  Its a defense mechanism, but hey if it works, im all for it.