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Wldflwr

By Wldflwr
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Wldflwr Honeycomb Member

Wldflwr

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I am waiting for my tests to come back--I should know for sure tomorrow. I am really hoping it is something else, but I realize that it is highly unlikely. This process started about a week ago. Came home and my boy friend said look, he had about a dozen red bumps on the shaft of his penis. Of course we used Google and WebMD. Then the next day I felt burning when I peed and it just so happened I had my annual exam. Tested for a Uti-negative. Boyfriend and I were worried about him and then I started going downhill--found a bump. He was healing no problems --pain or anything. I went to the doctor --thinking HPV. I just abut lost it when she wanted to test for herpes. So here I am waiting for the results. I have spent the last 3 days crying and depressed feeling like my life is over. How is anyone ever going to want me?   Will I ever feel sexy?  I feel like a dirty whore -- even though I have been with the same guy for 20 years--current boyfriend 3 years (and he comes from a long term relationship as well)   I have gone from I am going to be okay to deciding I will kill myself once I have confirmation. My boyfriend is great-he keeps telling me we will get through this,  we are not dying,  he loves me and still wants me. 

I still have my fingers crossed that the test will come back negative--while I have lesions,  I don't have any other symptoms (no aches,  flu symptoms, pain).  It feels word that we would both have an initial outbreak at the same time. 

If you have a minute please send some good vibes -- I can sure use them. 

 

 

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JBnATL Platinum Support Member

JBnATL

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From what you have described it really doesn't sound like herpes.  If he is already healing and you don't have any other symptoms then I doubt you are a Herpster.

Even if you do have this virus it is no reason to kill yourself.  Herpes is only a very common, mostly harmless virus, nothing more.  90% of all adults have herpes in one form or another.  I have had it a long time and have lived a normal life and that includes a normal sex life.  I have been on this website daily for over 6 years and have chatted with thousands of Herpsters and many of them have told me that getting this virus changed their lives for the better.

Anyone who has ever had a cold sore, mono or chicken pox has herpes.  Go to the "Secret to our Success" section of this website and read the hundreds of posts from people who thought no one would want them and ended up finding someone who did not care.  Personally I have given the 'talk' about a dozen times and have NEVER been rejected.

Please realize that this virus isn't a big deal.  The flu virus kills 30,000 people a year, so next to that this is nothing.

Good luck!

JB

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Wldflwr Honeycomb Member

Wldflwr

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Still waiting for results....waiting is hell. Good news is so far I have made it through the day without breaking down in tears. 

I hope you are right about not sounding like I will be positive,  but with all the time I have spent on Web MD/Google over the past few days....I think the results will be positive for HSV. 

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