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Freaking out!!!

stardust

By stardust
in Newly Diagnosed

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stardust Newbie

stardust

Posted
Posted

Hi. I am newly diagnosed with Herpes. I have been experiencing painful discomfort as I urintate and was able to feel the sores in my genital area. I have so many issues to deal with right now. The worse one is knowing how I got it.

I have been married for 7 years and I had an affair on my husband. The herpes is a result of my extramarital affair. I know I may hear alot of negative comments on me having an affair, but no one can beat me up the way I am beating myself up right now. I have told my husband everything. He is getting tested tomorrow. I am possibly losing everything good in my life and have gained an uncurable disease.

I am really freaking out. I am here for support because I feel so lost right now.

Will the herpes part of my situation get better? I have always had a negative view towards people with STD's and now here I am sitting with one. Will it get easier to accept?

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ducky406 Established Member

ducky406

Posted
Posted

I always thought herpes was a really gross thing that only gross people had until I got it! I think the worst thing is the way the word HERPES sounds. It sounds creepy-crawly if you know what I mean. I honestly think if there were a better word for it it wouldn't seem as bad. Hang in there and you will be fine. Way back when I was married I had an affair too and I won't judge you for that. I'm sure there are a lot of things going on in your life that led to that and no one here can make an assumption that you're a bad person just because of that. In my case after 5 years of mental abuse I latched onto someone who was nice to me and it felt so good to be loved!! Luckily I never got any STDs from that little fling but I did do the right thing and end my unhappy marriage. Look through these forums and you will find a lot of nice people with a lot of different backgrounds. No one is here to judge. I hope you're feeling better soon!

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Caliope Platinum Support Member

Caliope

Posted
Posted

the initial outbreak (ob) and the symptoms of herpes (we like to say hsv on here) are not constant and will perhaps come and go but usually it is worse in the beginning while your body develops antibodies to fight off the infection.

many experience discomfort in urination and one suggestion is to (let go) in the shower while the warm water runs over your urethra or to pour water over yourself while you go. this will dilute the acidity and hopefully provide some comfort.

I recommend that you drink lots of fresh, clean, water. it hydrates the body, helps to speed healing and dilutes the acidity.

epsom salt baths and aveeno active naturals bath powder are very soothing during ob's.

I hope you feel better soon.

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starphyse Established Member

starphyse

Posted
Posted

Also try to calm down your mental state has alot to do with your herpes outbreaks as well. Its always best to not get so upset about it and try to recenter yourself again.

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marinequeen818 Honeycomb Member

marinequeen818

Posted
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Similar scenario

I was not married, but I was dating my boyfriend and we were apart from each other over the summer ( We are in college). I found someone new, (hence cheated on him), and we broke up while we were still apart. As soon as we seen each other again, we started to have sex, and I spread the herpres to him a few days before I started showing symptoms of the disease. I did not know I have herpes or that the guy I cheated on my boyfriend did (he still thinks he doesnt). But I do know now that I have it and that my ex boyfriend has it (and him and I are living together for the time being).

It is what it is though. Life throws curve balls at people all the time. As long as you stay strong and realize the wrong things and learn from them, than you can redeem whatever disappointment you feel in yourself.

Haha, no doubt dealing with the husband (and for me the boyfriend will be tough), but you did not do it on purpose and therefore you should not feel bad about it. If anything the cheating should be the issue of the relationship (with the herpes as a accidental side effect). Haha and honestly (coming from a cheater), if your husband was not making you happy (Like my boyfriend), than there lies some fault on his side too. Pay attention to "what is" and not "what you make things out to be".

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