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Melissa2016

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Melissa2016

It's getting closer to my due date & I'm still very much afraid. The person who gave me genital 1 is the father to my unborn child. I haven't told him about this yet because i don't want this to become an agrument.We aren't together but him and his family will be there for my baby's birth. I don't want to talk about this with him until my baby is born. Can my privavcy be confidential or will they have to tell him what's going on since he is the father. I'm going to have family with me in the room & nobody knows i have this except me. I just want this to be a happy moment for me. Someone please give me some advice

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Free73

You will have to talk to your doctors about this and ask them what their advice is. Are you having a C-section or natural birth?

If he gave you herpes, why would he argue about it?

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Lisajd

Didnt you ask this before?  I dont see why its something they would raise during the birth.  Its not relevant. They would check.prior too

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Melissa2016

No I'm having a vaginal birth unless there is an active outbreak. Me & him aren't together we been having problems. But regardless of our situation i don't feel this is the right time to discuss this with him.. I just don't want this coming up while I'm giving birth to my baby. 

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WilsoInAus

I'm sorry to say you are simply going around in circles and it is time to short circuit.

It is time to put baby first and to do this, you need to put your feelings about the right time to one side.

Your birthing team have to know and be able to discuss openly during your labour. It is therefore best that anyone in the room know as well. If they don't know or you can't tell them, then they are not in the room.

For goodness sake, this is herpes, totally irrelevant in the context of the joy baby will bring and your ongoing life. Just tell this guy and family in advance that you have herpes and this may (but very unlikely) play a role during childbirth. If they have any issues then they can just suck it up, it's not about them, it's about the baby and a special Mom.

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Melissa2016

I don't think it's none of anyone's business & my doctor already knows but don't seem to concern about it. I don't feel like i want to tell anyone beside my doctors about this i don't know how they will judge me.Besides i haven't had an outbreak & my doctor thinks everything is going great. This is my first baby so everyone is kind of excited as well as myself i don't want any negativity. Aren't doctors suppose to keep your medical history confidential?? 

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WilsoInAus

Nothing is confidential in the birthing suite, some moms please confirm this!

Again, you make out that herpes is 'business' and there is even something to be 'judged' over... there isn't. Herpes isn't negativity, it's just herpes. As I say, tell everyone now, tell them to suck it up so you can all get on with the business of having a baby.

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Melissa2016

I myself is in the medical field & everything has to stay confidential but I'm not sure how it goes in the birthing center That's why i ask. It's about me and my childs health i don't think i have to share this with my whole family at this very moment. Some people don't even disclose herpes at all. It's not a big deal I'm just saying i don't want to disscuss this while I'm giving birth to my child. I really want to enjoy this time. 

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Melissa2016

And wilson how do u know your health issue isn't  suppose to be confidential while giving birth? Do u know someone who has givin birth in this situation? 

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WilsoInAus

Yes I do know several. 

No time to read a rule book and have a committee meeting when a c-section is involved. It just happens. The ob will look you straight in the eye and in calm, firm and very audible voice tell you what needs to happen and why. The automatic assumption is made that support people in the room are cleared to hear everything the doctor has to say, otherwise they shouldn't be there. They are there to be supportive and hence need to hear what is going on in case you turn to them for advice. That's an Australian delivery room perspective.

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Melissa2016

Well I'm not from australia.I'm from Chicago & i don't think that applys everywhere.Wouldn't they have to kick everyone out the room before they dissuss my health problemes if i didn't give them consent to discuss this around anyone? 

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Melissa2016

I very much don't believe this is true what you are saying wilson that's against privacy laws. As long as me and my baby are fine i don't think i need to tell everyone in the delivery room whats going on.And I'm sure theres plenty of mommys who agree. It's really nobodys business except me n my doctors.

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WilsoInAus

Privacy law in Australia does not apply to restrict what doctors say inside a delivery room or theatre. It applies in terms of the patients right to exclude anyone (family or otherwise) from the delivery room or theatre.

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MoMo44

To avoid this whole situation, you should ask your doctor to check you out prior to allowing everyone in to the delivery room.  Ask them to maintain your privacy if herpes does at some point become a topic while your family is in the room.  If you address that with your doctor then they will respect your wishes and ask your family to leave if they need to bring it up with you.  If an outbreak is present, you will need to have a c-section and at this point your family will have questions.  It is up to you whether or not you want to tell them but as long as you don't have an outbreak at the time of delivery then it won't be an issue.  

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YammyTea

Melissa, as a medical professional you are aware of HIPPA laws. Just ask those individuals to step out while they are checking you. I'm sure they only want to see when the baby is arriving.

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Melissa2016

Thank u guys so much!! Some people are very open with there condition as myself isn't quit yet this is all very new to me. I just want everything to go right without anybody judging me.N yes I'm aware of hippa that's why i was asking if anybody was in my situation and can help me. I've never been pregnant before this is my first so I'm not to sure how it all goes down in the birthing center. I'm also new to genital 1 ive only had it for about a year so i have many questions.I feel much better talking with you guys whos been in the same situation as me.This is why i joined this support group hoping for some answers.

Edited by Melissa2016

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Lisajd
20 hours ago, Melissa2016 said:

I don't think it's none of anyone's business & my doctor already knows but don't seem to concern about it. I don't feel like i want to tell anyone beside my doctors about this i don't know how they will judge me.Besides i haven't had an outbreak & my doctor thinks everything is going great. This is my first baby so everyone is kind of excited as well as myself i don't want any negativity. Aren't doctors suppose to keep your medical history confidential?? 

I would ask the dr whether there is a need to discuss in the delivery room and go from.there.   

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