Jump to content
World's Largest Herpes Support Group

How to talk to your partner

Recommended Posts


Hi all,

I am newly diagnosed with HSV 2. My partner and I had been waiting for the test results for a few days, so he's well aware that the possibility is there. Now that the doctor had confirmed that it's HSV 2, I'm struggling with how to tell my partner.

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to tell a loved one/partner that your test results came back positive? Any specific information I should be telling him (stats, facts, etc.)? 

I'm still trying to wrap my head around all of this, so I'm not really sure how to even start the conversation. 

Any and all suggestions are much appreciated!

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

This depends greatly on whether this is likely to be your primary outbreak or you suspect you have had it for years?

Is this your first known outbreak and did it involve multiple lesions? Was it the swab that was positive and correctly typed or was it an IgG blood test? The outcomes here will narrow down your view on whether this is a first outbreak.

If that is the case that this is the first outbreak and other signs are compatible with a recent infection then your partner is the source. I feel the discussion is then one of "herpes has been confirmed, it seems very likely that this is my first outbreak from a recent infection, that means that you very likely have the virus and that's actually a big plus to carry the same type as it can now disappear from our thinking within our loving relationship that can continue in every was as before".

It may then be a good idea to suggest that he confirm everything with IgG testing to proceed along the lines you desire in the relationship.

How does this sound?

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • The Hive is Thriving!

    • Total Topics
    • Total Posts
  • Posts

    • Abdul malik
      I'm in ny and 39 inshallah Allah u still check for this
    • WilsoInAus
      That's exactly right, you can return to your life and get the blood test as a sleep easy in 12 weeks time (from the last episode).
    • Laurenhelena
      Him and his ex have regular breakouts with all the traditional symptoms and I believe he was swabbed.  So I can return to life as it was before all of this drama ? I may still look into a blood test is I am confident it is accurate 
    • WilsoInAus
      @Laurenhelena how is this guy sure he has herpes? All sounding a bit odd to me. Yes it is very unlikely you will develop lesions now. Rubbing skin to skin is required for any feasible transmission chance. The odds of transmission with unprotected vaginal sex are of the order of 0.08% per epsiode. Halve this if a condom is worn. Compare that to chamydia that has about a 33% chance of transmission with unprotected sex; now that's contagious!
    • Laurenhelena
      I just feel that it’s known as such a contagious STD - I’ve been lying to my family cause when I tried to talk about it they became very anxious and begged me to tell them I hadn’t slept with him when I had - If someone told me that they slept with someone with genital herpes my mind would instantly think they had it.  So it’s unlikely then that I’m going to get symptoms now? I’m not going anything further with that guy but we have cuddled and kissed in bed with underwear on, is that ok?  Im quite sure he has hsv2 given that his ex gave it to him through a threesome  I’ve never had a cold sore   
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.