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Scared and disappointed

Sara2323

By Sara2323,
in Rant & Rave

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Sara2323 Newbie

Sara2323

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My mother has gotten cold sores fever blisters since she was a child. Lack of knowledge on her end led to her passing along this HSV1 virus to me. I know based on her recollection that ive had 1 cold sore as a child but nothing since the. I always knew cold sores were a form of herpes but it never clicked. This last year i met the man of my dreams and we decided to get tested as we began our new relationship. Turns out my simple childhood cold sore was actually HSV1. I was beyond devistated!

After talking and researching we decided to move on with our relationship anyways since i wasnt prone to outbreaks i felt a lil better with that decision. 

Just this week and after tons of stress and being a bit under the weather i got a fever blister/cold sore. I feel so ashamed and scared to even tell him. My first thought is to end my perfect relationship because if i feel this terrible about having something i couldnt help but get i dont think i can handle passing this along to anyone let alone this amazing man especially after reading that it can be transmitted without an outbreak and as genital herpes. 

Hurt confused and terrified im left with the decision of how to break this news to him and whether i should walk away from him before i risk passing this along :(

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Seeker1960 Platinum Support Member

Seeker1960

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The majority of people already have HSV1 orally. Your boyfriend probably already has it. 25% of HSV1 infected are missed by the blood test. I would not give up because of it.

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Joseph_Esp Established Member

Joseph_Esp

Posted
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2 hours ago, Sara2323 said:

My mother has gotten cold sores fever blisters since she was a child. Lack of knowledge on her end led to her passing along this HSV1 virus to me. I know based on her recollection that ive had 1 cold sore as a child but nothing since the. I always knew cold sores were a form of herpes but it never clicked. This last year i met the man of my dreams and we decided to get tested as we began our new relationship. Turns out my simple childhood cold sore was actually HSV1. I was beyond devistated!

After talking and researching we decided to move on with our relationship anyways since i wasnt prone to outbreaks i felt a lil better with that decision. 

Just this week and after tons of stress and being a bit under the weather i got a fever blister/cold sore. I feel so ashamed and scared to even tell him. My first thought is to end my perfect relationship because if i feel this terrible about having something i couldnt help but get i dont think i can handle passing this along to anyone let alone this amazing man especially after reading that it can be transmitted without an outbreak and as genital herpes. 

Hurt confused and terrified im left with the decision of how to break this news to him and whether i should walk away from him before i risk passing this along :(

Are you crazy? Everybody has that. It´s really difficult to pass it on. My parents have been together for 35 years, my mom has it and never passed it on to my dad. I have it, and never passed it on to anyone of my girlfriends...I have had dates with girls who showed up with it on their lips and I did not give a shit. Live your life and never think about it, it´s really absolutely nothing. It´s bad if you have it down there and you have frequent outbreaks, people can really go crazy...Like me, for example. Cold sores are just nothing. Forget about it!

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Free73 Acknowledged Support Member

Free73

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Seriously, oral herpes is a walk in the park. Those that don't have it are in the great minority. Ending a relationship because of HSV1 is a massive overreaction. It's nothing so get on with your life

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KCookie Honeycomb Member

KCookie

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I agree please don't give up on your relation ship, just be careful when you get one. I get them very regularly so I don't share anything, towels, utensils, toothpaste etc, I actually have my own stuff and my kids have been told from an early age not to touch any of it. Kids being kids though they don't always listen so I wouldn't blame it on your mum though she probably done her best to protect you. 

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KCookie Honeycomb Member

KCookie

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1 hour ago, Free73 said:

Seriously, oral herpes is a walk in the park.  a massive overreaction. It's nothing so get on with your life.

Don't quite agree with that, I get them so often it's not fun looking ugly and feeling like a lepar most of your life, it's very depressing.

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Joseph_Esp Established Member

Joseph_Esp

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9 hours ago, KCookie said:

Don't quite agree with that, I get them so often it's not fun looking ugly and feeling like a lepar most of your life, it's very depressing.

True, for some it can be a little bit harder, but there is no stigma attached and you have no reasons to feel too bad. Why? Because nobody will ever think bad about you because of that nor will ghost you or feel disgusted. Take pills if you need to, but you belong to the majority of people, not the other way around.

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KCookie Honeycomb Member

KCookie

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Pills, I'm sick of the bloody things, that's all I take, obviously aren't working to much otherwise I wouldn't get so many but I'm still to frightened to come off them, I just seem to find different pills to take, now on olive leaf as one member on here said it helps them. 

Yes I agree about there's no stigma attached but every time I get one I feel my life's just about over. Don't know why just do, I never go out, hardly know anyone and keep to myself for the fear of getting a sore  and having to face anybody. 

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