Reka

So now I'm single with herpes

15 posts in this topic

So after having to accept the fact that I have herpes and  I told my partner hoping that he'd stay...he decided to walk  out on me. How  awesome :|. like now I can't even imagine what it's gonna be like dating..especially in my country. I mean he's never been in a situation like this but I never thought he'd be so inconsiderate :/. He just said no I will not pursue a relationship with you I have explained to him what herpes is he still wouldn't listen I thought he cared about me. Seeing as how it was a fairly new relationship and we had only had sex once with a condom I totally just gave up trying to convince him. I told him to go get tested anyway. chances are he's ok but I'm hurt at the moment . ..sigh 

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Oh no :( I'm sorry, girl. First off, good on you for telling him. Some people shy away and don't even end up telling their partners. As for him, Maybe he's just scared. as you know, this is difficult to deal with so maybe he's just acting out on emotions and just needs time to think. If he is gone for good, then you know he wasn't in it for the long run.... it's unfortunate, but as time goes on you will start to feel better mentally and find someone who loves you for you, no matter what. I'm always here to chat and give support! Head up high, sweets! 

Theblues, LilyMae, Reka and 2 others like this

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I really wish he didn't I've been crying all day. I only wish he would understand like Idk what to do anymore 

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Suffering is only temporary, boo! You will get through this! 

Reka and LilyMae like this

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Hi @Reka. That stinks. It's hard and it hurts now. Hug.

But in the long run you're probably better off. 

I know this is going to sound like bs to you right now because you're in pain and feeling alone. But really try not to take it personally. It's not about you. And it's not about hsv. It's about him. His own fear. That's not a partner to walk with you in all the uncertainty that is human existence. Good riddance, little man. Hold your head up high. You will get through this. You don't need him. And when you're ready, you'll find someone who is amazing and just right for you. 

Strawberrycupcake, AusHopeful, ravana and 4 others like this

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Lilymae is right re; better off without him.

life will carry on believe me, for every man who doesnt understand your situation, there will be 2 who do.  You just havent got the right guy for you so its probably a blessing that he has shown his true colours before you got further involved.

I think the majority of us panic when we first get the news, thinking our sex life has gone forever instead of us just trying to get better from the initial O/B.  We all know it thrives with stress so i believe thats one of the factors when the first episode takes longer to clear up.

Since catching H all those years ago i have gone on to date like any "normal" person with probably just one negative reaction to the news....so honestly its not the end of the world, dont worry about sex at the moment just try to take it easy

LilyMae, AusHopeful and Newtothisandscared like this

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Thank you for the encouragement. Really the sex part wasnt my concern. it's just having someone to be there for me is all I want. to understand this is what's happening and this is what we have to do. but in time someone will come I know ...

phil UK 1972, Trying45 and Theblues like this

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21 hours ago, LilyMae said:

"Good riddance, little man."

I really do not think that is helpful and very condescending.

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2 hours ago, Unrequited said:

I really do not think that is helpful and very condescending.

It was not meant in a condescending way at all. 

phil UK 1972 likes this

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I understand that ...don't worry about it 

LilyMae likes this

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Quote

 

 

 

On ‎1‎/‎12‎/‎2017 at 0:45 PM, Reka said:

Thank you for the encouragement. Really the sex part wasnt my concern. it's just having someone to be there for me is all I want. to understand this is what's happening and this is what we have to do. but in time someone will come I know ...

I so know how you feel. when I told the few of my male guys friends they have been so supportive and helpful with cheering me up and seems they have become my date partners.  It is nice to have  a guy around and not worry about sex. Best of luck to you.

Reka and Aalia like this

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Aww I know the feeling u mentioned in you country so I'm guessing its a country that this disease is rear...its the same with me my advice to u is to be friends with someone from the support group for ur support..I know how scary it is :(

Reka likes this

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On 1/12/2017 at 3:23 AM, phil UK 1972 said:

Lilymae is right re; better off without him.

life will carry on believe me, for every man who doesnt understand your situation, there will be 2 who do.  You just havent got the right guy for you so its probably a blessing that he has shown his true colours before you got further involved.

I disagree. I did so much research before telling my boyfriend about my diagnosis and everything I read said "your partner will be so supportive blah blah" and not to worry. Guess what. My partner absolutely ran in the opposite direction. I wish people affected would be realistic with those of us newly diagnosed and not offer all this fake false hope. Truth is, there are not many partners out there who would be supportive. Better to have a realistic view than cling to shreds of nothing.   I've read many more stories on here of those who didn't stay than those who did.

 

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And I disagree with you ! It's people like you who like to cast doom and gloom and try to make people think it's the end of the world. 

LilyMae likes this

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