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YammyTea

Idea: Herpes Disclosure Contract

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For those who choose to date with herpes and are in fear of someone coming back saying they gave them herpes, maybe a contract would be a good idea.

The contract should require the person to get tested for herpes prior to sexual involvement, even kissing. (If that person has been with someone in the past 3 months, wait another 3 months and get retested to be sure). The person should also provide a copy of the results (don't just take their word for it).

  • The person should acknowledge they are aware that you have herpes and you have full disclosed your status
  • The person should acknowledge they are will to "risk" catching the virus  (I hate the word risk now...fyi)
  • The person should acknowledge they will keep your status confidential

I feel this will save some people from guilt and possible lawsuits...just saying

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Whilst it seems very logical and seems good on paper. Will it not serve to freak out the other person and scare them? This doesn't really serve to reduce stigma, which is the real problem. o

I think choosing better loving responsible partners, educating yourself and them and going into a sexual relationship with them both aware of the possibility they may contract it. But also, being responsible and knowing the risks can be reduced to near 0%.

If it is the right person, it shouldn't be a problem.

this just seems a bit too clinical for me, but yes, there is a risk. If you are worried, all you would need to do is have some evidence in a text or something they were aware of you having Herpes. Like you sending them all the links to education and information, say in an email. Then, you always have something to fall back on.

A legal contract is way too much, sometimes we serve to build stigma by hiding from it, ultimately trying to protect ourselves from hurt and shame. We should be speaking out, and open about it, its just such a taboo condition and its nonesense why that is.

I suppose if you had disclosed and you were very wealthy and famous, then that is a different matter, because there are people in the world who would use this against them for financial gain and fame. But the normal person isn't like this.

Edited by Unrequited

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I think @YammyTea is onto something.  I googled, "Can you sue someone for giving you herpes" before seeing this thread and found these two articles.

http://stories.avvo.com/relationships/10-std-laws-you-should-know-about-2.html

http://blogs.findlaw.com/injured/2014/06/can-you-sue-someone-for-giving-you-an-std.html

Obviously, whipping out an already drafted contract might not be the best idea, but it's something that can be discussed beforehand.

This would be the same thing as a prenuptial agreement.  Such agreements aren't just for those with money. And, people having a prenuptial agreement or disclosure contract doesn't make them any less loving, responsible, or trusting.  It can just save a lot of heartache and headache should the marriage/relationship end or the person does end up contracting HSV.  

We all know relationships can turn sour and ugly.  And, people will bring up certain things out of hurt and resentment.  The last thing any HSV+ person needs is someone to claim they didn't know or wasn't told and have it be a he/she said, he/she said situation.  

I think this is a good idea one can either choose to use or not.

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You have to prove you were tested negative prior to the relationship.  Drs may not do that. Id rather disclose and agree to get tested. I want to know their std status too.  I dont want hiv..

 

 

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