Burdenofpain

Suppressive therapy only during sexy time?

8 posts in this topic

Ever since I was diagnosed 4 years ago I avoided dating and sex. It's taken me 3 years to come to terms with my HSV 2 diagnosis. I have about 4 obs a year and have never been on a valtrex suppressive therapy. Only time I had valtrex was my first ob 4 years ago that my doctor gave me for 7 days. After that initial 7 day dose, I left my immune to boost since I was diagnosed and have not had valtrex since. I wasn't sexually active after my diagnosis so I figured no point to be on valtrex

Currently: I have met a wonderful man whom I have to eventually tell of my HSV burden. It would be a long distance relationship out of state where we can visit eachother when possible.

If I tell him and he is willing to accept the risks,I would like us to be intimate and protected.  I've never been on suppressive therapy and don't know if I want to because I  won't be seeing him everyday. I'm afraid to start therapy and my body becomes dependent. So if I ever get off therapy I'm screwed.

 My question is, I would like to be on some type of therapy when I visit him only. Is there a dosage procedure for this? For example if I visit him for 4 days,  do I prepare my body by taking valtrex a whole week before? Should i stay on it when i still see him?

 

So stinking lost, please help anyone

Edited by Burdenofpain
Typo

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There really is no way to know for sure what would work best in this situation while greatly reducing the risk of transmission.

I know you don't want to be on daily suppressive therapy, but if I were you - I would be if you intend to have sexual relations with him and he himself is negative.  I'm sure you would feel horrible if, let's say you decided to just take it a week before being with him, use condoms, and it was still transmitted.  You might regret not taking it 2 weeks before seeing him or 3 weeks or 4 weeks, etc. (You get the idea).  I believe the best thing that should be discussed first is what is his sexual health history, too.  Has he been tested for everything, including HSV?  Then, you can give him information about the risk of transmission or research the info together, etc. 

From what I've read on here, the risk of transmission is lower for female to male if on daily suppressive therapy and condoms are used.  But, you should do your own reputable research.  Some long term couples have never transmitted the virus to their HSV negative partner (their partner has actually tested negative).  But, that is their experience.  It may not necessarily be yours.

Depending on where your OBs occur, it's important to let him know everything (obviously).  I saw one post from another member who told her partner he had to wear boxer shorts (plus a condom, of course). For me, personally, I do not have OBs in that area.  So, it is all dependent on your own personal OB experience.  

I myself would not want to put someone who was HSV- at higher risk just because I did not want to take daily suppressive therapy.  If I didn't and my partner understood the risks, that's a different matter.  But, many people on here did not receive enough information or were even deceived that they could not make an informed decision before being with an HSV+ person.  So, don't you think we should be more conscientious than those who were not? 

 

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Your absolutely correct and thank you for responding. I was getting worried my post got lost. 

I'll definitely see what his history is etc and see what he is comfortable with. If he decides to continue and be intimate then even more precautions will follow.

Since this is a long distance and there can be a month or two not being in physical contact with him that's why I thought about preparing with antivirals for the times I do see him. My body has fought this naturally and I just don't want to become dependent on anti virals to the point where if I stop I'll have constant obs. I usually only have 4 obs year. I hope you see where I'm coming from. But if this becomes more serious then a daily suppressive will have to be my final result.

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I totally understand.  I prefer natural remedies myself or at least not needing to take medication.  However, I am new to this diagnosis (Jan.2017) and for now, daily suppressive therapy is what works best for me.  From the research I have done myself and other posts on here, even though you don't have an active OB, you could still be shedding.  And, as a result - transmit to your partner.  Please make sure you do further research on "viral shedding."  I think that is one of the major causes for transmission - the mistaken belief that just because you don't have an active OB, you cannot transmit the virus. 

Good luck with the disclosure, talk, and relationship!

 

Burdenofpain likes this

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I want to do the natural therapy because of the side effects of valtrex. Is this a good way to go? I want more kids one day and how is that even possible now?

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Suppressive medication will reduce the risk of transmission but the natural therapy is do not but if you are with someone and they are prepared to take the risk then having kids should not be a problem and you can still take antivirals at the same time whilst you were trying to conceive.  If you're not planning children and mediately the longer you have the virus and hopefully you will have less outbreaks therefore there is less risk of transmission.  And it also depends on the other person status that you will wait

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On Saturday, February 18, 2017 at 3:34 PM, Burdenofpain said:

Your absolutely correct and thank you for responding. I was getting worried my post got lost. 

I'll definitely see what his history is etc and see what he is comfortable with. If he decides to continue and be intimate then even more precautions will follow.

Since this is a long distance and there can be a month or two not being in physical contact with him that's why I thought about preparing with antivirals for the times I do see him. My body has fought this naturally and I just don't want to become dependent on anti virals to the point where if I stop I'll have constant obs. I usually only have 4 obs year. I hope you see where I'm coming from. But if this becomes more serious then a daily suppressive will have to be my final result.

My understanding is that you only have to take it 3 days prior and then I'll be asleep while you are spending time with that person.  I was on antivirals when I was saying someone and haven't had any outbreaks but my outbreaks prior to were minor anyway

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23 minutes ago, Lisajd said:

My understanding is that you only have to take it 3 days prior and then I'll be asleep while you are spending time with that person.  I was on antivirals when I was saying someone and haven't had any outbreaks but my outbreaks prior to were minor anyway

I'm confused about this too...I don't have outbreaks now...if I do suppressive therapy what are the odds that I start having terrible outbreaks if I ever stop? 

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