Got Herpes In Trade For My Virginity

[jasonstunt]

I lost my virginity to a girl last week and now I have genital herpes. I'm scared to death right now, I've already read up quite a bit, but it hasn't helped a lot. Not sure what I should do, I'm just so utterly scared right now :'(

1. I'm scared of taking a shower as it's the primary infection and can spread to other parts of the body right now. What do you guys recommend? Is it okay if I wait till the primary infection passes over to bathe?

2. What are the real HSV 1 and HSV 2 statistics in United States? I've read a few different sources and they all state different stats. 

3. I live with my parents and really don't want to tell them as it'll freak them out and give them unnecessary stress. That being said, we have a common laundry bucket and my parents primarily do the laundry. Is there a chance I might pass it on to them? I know that the herpes virus only survives 10 seconds outside the body? 

 

[luvurself16]

1) Purchase gloves and use them when touching your genitals. After removing the gloves wash your hands with warm water and soap. Dry your hands with a paper towel and dispose of it. Try bed baths first with washing your genitals last. Use a paper towel to dry your genitals. If you use a towel don't use it on the rest of your body. Leave the towel out to dry by itself or use a blow dryer on hot on the area you used to dry your genitals.

2) Stats do differ.

3) I would imagine a primary infection is stronger. I would handle my own dirty laundry since they won't know to take precautions.

 

* It'll get better with time.

[t361]

I was worried about this too when I was infected.

I followed these rules with no extension to any other part of my body:

1. Good hand washing is huge. Wash them with warm water and good soap after you touch your bits. You can use hand sanitizer too (on your hands!) if you feel it helps. I did as an added security. I never used gloves.

2. Don't touch your junk and then touch your face. Keeping clean is important but wash your bits last in the shower after you wash your hair and face etc.

3. Avoid touching your bits during breakouts. Helps them heal a lot faster.

I wouldn't worry about laundry. Chances of transmission through clothing being washed is next to nil. But yeah, do your own loads of laundry if it makes you feel better.

Drop me a line if you feel the need to chat.

[LifeGoesOnn]

Did you get tested ? Do you have lesions or symptoms ?

[SnowAngel]

I'm so sorry. I was also a vigin when I got this. My heart goes out to you. Have you been to a doctors? I think my biggest mistake was being scared and not getting the treatment I needed. I kept letting it go fir almost a month! Go get checked, doctors deal with things like this all the time and as for your family you don't need to tell them if you don't want to. I choose to tell after a few mo this and they were very supportive. Sending you good vibes. 

[Elle22]

Hey, welcome to the club! Herpes being scary is just a front so we don't get too many people joining all at once. (alright so crotch issues arent the most fun, but the majority of people with herpes come to feel that it's not a big deal)

1. Herpes is spread through direct skin to skin contact from an infected site to an infectable site. If you are flexible enough to touch your mouth or eyes to your genitals, refrain from doing that until everything is cleared up. No need to worry about showers/baths other than if its painful for you.

2. The reason the stats differ is because hsv testing is not consistently offered or encouraged in the USA so a certain amount is approximate. It's about 1 in 4 ladies, 1 in 5 guys, but the basic gist is that its fairly common (super common if you also include oral hsv)

3. Laundry is fine. As mentioned, herpes is spread through direct skin to skin contact. So don't rub your genitals on your parents.

As other people mentioned, if you have not been tested, you should do that. If you still have an ob they might be able to swab it. If not, you may have to wait 3 months for an IGG blood test (it takes about that long for your body to make antibodies detectable in blood, hsv itself is not in the blood). Hope that cleared some things up for you!

[LilyMae]

Hi @jasonstunt. Sorry to hear about your experience. That sucks. But, you are going to be okay. I've had h 21 years and at first I was also really scared about spreading it. Especially to my face and hands. That never happened. Mucous membranes are more porous, as they are meant to allow the body to release moisture. But the rest of your skin is actually a fairly good barrier to hsv. You really need a cut or some kind of open sore for the hsv to get in on non mucous membrane skin. So, my advice is wash your hands with soap and warm water, just like the rest of polite society, after you touch your genitals. I'm still careful about my eyes but I'm not worried about it. 

It's totally okay for you to bathe. In fact, I think it's important to keep everything down there clean. And I think, emotionally you'll do better if you're maintaining more of a normal existence. Just use a little common sense and don't do something like rub the towel on a very bad h sore and then rub that same towel spot imediately and vigorously into your eyes. Even that might not spread it, but you get my drift. When I'm visiting family, I tend to not leave my towels in the bathroom where someone else might use them. But that's more our of politeness that any fear they would get h. At home I have shared a bathroom with my boyfriend for 12 years and he has used my towels and never had a problem. 

The statistical data on hsv is not ideally taken or kept. Some surveys include people as young as 12 years old. Almost none of them include anyone over 50 and that's a huge part of the poputation not counted. It's been a couple years since I looked into the stats so maybe that's changed. 

Please feel free to pm me if you have any questions or want to talk about things. Sending a hug. Remember you are going to be okay.