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cantdoit

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It is a felony in the state of New Jersey when someone infects another with an std.  It's also very easy to sue someone for this. I believe this guy knowingly gave this to me and I plan to contact a lawyer Monday.   Thought some of you may want to know.  

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You will need a Westernblot to prove you have HSV-2 and probably one from prior to the relationship otherwise what stops you being countersued?

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My husband is negative. This guy refused to test. He will be ordered to by a judge. And if I can stop him from continuing to infect other women I will. I plan to call tomorrow to find out what they need to know. It's a felony in New Jersey so it happens. 

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4 hours ago, cantdoit said:

My husband is negative. This guy refused to test. He will be ordered to by a judge. And if I can stop him from continuing to infect other women I will. I plan to call tomorrow to find out what they need to know. It's a felony in New Jersey so it happens. 

Were you tested before your husband cause this will be important too?  Has you test confirmed now you have hsv2?  

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I won't be suin g the guy he gave it to me because I chose to have sex with him and and even if we used condoms I still could have caught it.  The only way you are going to be out of prove that person gave it to you is if you were tested prior to having sex with them and your test result was negative

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12 hours ago, honey_6974 said:

Why are Americans all so litigious?

Well, good luck either way.

I'm not suing him. It's a felony. They will press charges and if found guilty he could serve time. 

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20 hours ago, honey_6974 said:

Why are Americans all so litigious?

Probably because we have the most freedom and rights and a robust judicial system to protect them.

JB

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1 hour ago, JBnATL said:

Probably because we have the most freedom and rights and a robust judicial system to protect them.

JB

Such as the freedom to bear arms. Luckily the judicial system is so robust to ensure gun crime is the lowest in the world, that's right isn't it?

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I am sorry this might be tricky situation to prove either way. Not infected before this "relationship" and truly positive or negative etc... I think best thing would be him getting blood test to prove his status as it could just make things clear is herpes part of this situation or not. Have you had positive swab or how were you diagnosed with hsv-2 in the first place? I hope you find some comfort with this situation and things will end best way for both parties.  

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18 hours ago, JBnATL said:

Probably because we have the most freedom and rights and a robust judicial system to protect them.

JB

I wonder if the people of North Korea have similar delusions xD

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  • 3 weeks later...
On Mon Mar 20 2017 at 6:20 PM, JBnATL said:

Probably because we have the most freedom and rights and a robust judicial system to protect them.

JB

No you dont... in fact its a pretty fascist country. BLM and all that jazz

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Just now, Unrequited said:

No you dont... in fact its a pretty fascist country. BLM and all that jazz

The poor get completely fucked over. Next to no welfare state..  if thats equality and equal rights... well count me out

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Hmm, am I sensing a little warmth around the collar region sneaking into this thread ;)?  Interesting to learn of this law.  I heard about a similar case in England where the woman took a fella to court and won - he was sentenced to 14 months in jail!!  Someone speaking for the Herpes Viruses Association, said the sentence was ‘outrageous’ and compared the case to prosecuting children for ‘giving their friends chicken pox’.  I feel this may be a slightly flippant response, although I get the point :).

Personally, although I fully understand the anger and associated feelings of being infected by someone who didn't disclose, I can't quite understand how you can justify taking them to court over it - unless it was rape (in which case you would hope they would be in court anyway!).  If you decide to have a sexual relationship with someone, surely the onus is on you to be certain you are protected from any STD's.  If you don't take that responsibility for yourself, who will?  It's no good crying later and running about filing lawsuits.  At the end of the day, you still have herpes.  

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On 3/19/2017 at 1:09 PM, cantdoit said:

It is a felony in the state of New Jersey when someone infects another with an std.  It's also very easy to sue someone for this. I believe this guy knowingly gave this to me and I plan to contact a lawyer Monday.   Thought some of you may want to know.  

What did your lawyer say?

JB

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6 hours ago, cantdoit said:

I'll message you

I hope that if you do win this case it does actually make you feel better about it all

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8 hours ago, Atrapasueños said:

Y que pasa cuando tu contagio no es por sexo? 

 

And what happens when your infection is not for sex?

@oldgal

You maybe want to take your granny to jail for kissing you?  If this virus is as common as we are led to believe, then there's really no answer - short of leading a celibate and completely hands-off life.  

All I am saying is that in a sexual relationship, ie where the choice is ours (unlike granny's kisses), we must take full responsibility for our safety if herpes is such a big concern to us.  There ARE people out there who won't disclose or who don't know.  If we decide to play russian roulette and end up losing, it's too late to go shouting to the lawyers about it.  We talk about justice, but what is justice?  Just a civilised form of revenge.  But we are still the ones who face the life sentence.  Better imo to find one of these forums and learn to accept and deal with the situation with the help of others who share it.  We will never change how others think.  Better to change how we think and move on peacefully.  Stress is a major trigger!  

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1 hour ago, oldgal said:

You maybe want to take your granny to jail for kissing you?  If this virus is as common as we are led to believe, then there's really no answer - short of leading a celibate and completely hands-off life.  

All I am saying is that in a sexual relationship, ie where the choice is ours (unlike granny's kisses), we must take full responsibility for our safety if herpes is such a big concern to us.  There ARE people out there who won't disclose or who don't know.  If we decide to play russian roulette and end up losing, it's too late to go shouting to the lawyers about it.  We talk about justice, but what is justice?  Just a civilised form of revenge.  But we are still the ones who face the life sentence.  Better imo to find one of these forums and learn to accept and deal with the situation with the help of others who share it.  We will never change how others think.  Better to change how we think and move on peacefully.  Stress is a major trigger!  

There are some people who don't want to take responsibility for their own actions and would prefer to blame the other person.  You are right that we have to take responsibility but sometimes the person can get tested prior to a new relationship and maybe contracted it 2 months ago and antibodies have not developed so you step into this new relationship thinking that you are negative when in fact you are not and then whose fault is it.

There are some people that you can't preach to in regards to changing your thinking but im with you on that.  Its about choice.  Move forward or stay where you are.

 Personally taking someone to court won't resolve the whole issue because you still have to deal with why you ended up with that person in the first place particularly if it was through an affair.   

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