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My experience


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I think it's really important for us to share out experience so we all know we aren't alone. This is especially important for the newly diagnosed who may not have people in the real life to talk about this to. 

Here's my experience:

I was diagnosed 5 or 6 years ago. I was sleeping with someone who knew he had it and he decided not to tell me. I dealt with that anger for a very long time. 

My first outbreak was not as bad as Ive read. Dont get me wrong. It was bad but I caught it soon enough to immediately start antivirals. I remember I first found a bump in my vagina while I was in the shower. And it stung. Then I found another one. I screamed omg that mother fucker and jumped out of the shower. I went to the ER. I couldnt wait for an appointment. They did testing and put me on valtrex. They knew without testing. I remember it was weeks before I could goto the bathroom without horrendous pain. I remember squatting in the bathtub to splash myself to clean down there. The pain was horrible. I remember thinking everyone knew. I remember planning revenge. I remember not getting revenge and accepting an apology and confession I'll never get. 

I dealt with a lot of emotions with my diagnosis. Between devestation, anger, depression, anxiety, loneliness. I started drinking and using drugs to help with these emotions. It really turned my life upside down for a while. I've now been sober for four years. 

The first couple years I never had outbreaks. Then... I got pregnant and my body hasn't been the same. 

I had my daughter two years ago. I had an outbreak when they tried to induce me (I told them my body couldn't handle all the stress they were causing trying to get her out) and they chose to do a C-section. She also underwent testing to make sure she didn't get HSV. Thank God she didn't but those feelings of shame sprouted up again thinking I put my innocent little girl in the way of harm. 

Since then my OBs are constant. I don't know what's going on with my body. Antivirals work sometimes. I use tea tree oil. I eat healthy. Take lysine supplements. The problem may be stress and lack of sleep. Who knows. Im getting very frustrated though. 

I've also had more positive experiences telling partners about HSV than negative experiences. The key is to make sure they are worth telling. Don't just meet someone and within 24 hours tell them. Get to know them. Give it a month. You may not need to tell them.

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Hi Ssny24.  Thank you for sharing your experience on this site.  A lot of us here can relate to your physical/emotional experiences.  Many of us also have outbreaks, or at least many unpleasant symptoms, constantly.  I am sorry to read about your earlier days and how you tried to deal with the situation, but it's wonderful to read how you pulled yourself out of the abyss and learned to accept.  That must have been really tough to do and you must have been to hell and back in that time.  Well done you!  I am full of admiration for anyone who can fight their way back from such a downward spiralling situation.  

Stress is a big issue with outbreaks.  I find nothing will bring one on faster!  Of course, stress has knock-on effects too, and even the healthiest diet will not compensate for it.  Some kind of relaxation techniques may be helpful to you.  Try a little meditation morning and evening in a quiet time.  And/or maybe yoga.  

I really couldn't agree more with your last paragraph.  It's the best possible advice to everyone in that situation. :2thumbsup:

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    • WilsoInAus
      Welcome @Marlena correct you and your partner would benefit from the type specific version of the HSV test (meaning a separate result for HSV-1 and HSV-2). I had no idea the Euroimmun or equivalent actually had a combined version, it is pretty useless given the high incidence of HSV-1. Only one thing to add is that if you are getting frequent symptoms then you can obtain a swab and have this tested for HSV and other things as well.
    • WilsoInAus
      Yeah @FirstTimeUser there is nothing in the pic suggestive of genital herpes. It seems both you and your partner have HSV-1 orally and that's actually pretty cool. It means you won't pass it to each other's genitals owing to immunity. If the two of you are concerned about genital HSV-2 then mutually test for the IgG HSV-2 and HSV-1 antibodies.
    • CHT
      Hi "firstimeuser".... let's see what "WilsoinAus" thinks but, for what's it worth, I don't see anything in your picture (or description) that looks like herpes..... it actually looks more like a scrape or follicle issue.... maybe even a bug bite.  Also, by the way, the odds of having HSV2 with an outbreak on your testicles is very low.... that is not a typical spot for an HSV2 outbreak.    Have your doctor take a look and if you want some peace of mind, get an IgG antibody test for HSV2 in about 12 weeks (takes that long for antibodies to develop).... but, again, I don't think you have anything to worry about here.... just not seeing anything herpes-related here.    take care....best of luck.
    • CHT
      Hi Marlena..... since you stated you've had "herpes on the lips" then you likely have oral HSV1, which the majority of adults worldwide have... the fact your results for HSV1/2 are positive (at least I believe that's what your results show - I don't speak Polish but, I think I'm seeing your results are positive based on the attachment you included) may simply be reading the fact that you have HSV1.... the question is whether you've contracted HSV2 in your genital area. Your description of symptoms could possibly be related to HSV but, it's difficult to verify with certainty based on your description. You may also have contracted a different type of sexually transmitted infection (STI) or a simple fungal infection.   Your doctor does not believe what he/she is seeing is HSV but, unless your doctor has experience with HSV, they could easily misdiagnose your condition.  You need full STI testing. Do you have the option to travel to a larger city in Poland where you could get an appointment to be seen by a doctor with more experience with STIs?  You really need to have an experienced doctor take a look and run tests to check specifically for HSV2 as well as other STIs.  If they can rule out HSV2 or other STIs then hopefully they can then determine what is causing the redness, itching, and swollen condition.... again, it may not be HSV2 but, you need proper testing to verify.  Have you talked to your boyfriend about all this?  Has he had any symptoms on his genitals that are suspect?  Has he taken any tests to check for STIs?   I hope you can get more definitive testing so you know what you are dealing with and how best to treat it.  If you have any other questions/concerns, please come back and let us know.... I hope this helps a little.... best of luck.... take care.
    • CHT
      Hey Jeremy.... I know only too well that emotional pain you are feeling.... I really do.... and many of us on this site also know that pain.  It's not so much the physical side of having HSV that hurts, it's the stigma and risk of rejection that stings like hell!  You have to do what you think is right as it relates to when you disclose your HSV status when getting to know someone romantically.... I just think it's best to do it relatively early, and certainly before any sexual activity.   Have you looked into dating sites that cater to those with HSV?  I know others have had some luck with meeting partners on these sites.... you don't have to worry about the "disclosure" talk nor would you obviously have to worry about passing along a virus the other person already has.... take a few minutes and search around and see if it's an option you like. By the way, by taking your daily antiviral med and using a condom, your risk of passing along the virus is down around 1.9%.... pretty good odds that if you stick to your regimen you are very unlikely to transmit the virus....keep that in mind when you meet your next girlfriend and need to have "the talk."  That statistic might help calm any concerns about contracting the virus from you. I hope you don't give up.... as tough as it can be to find the right partner, it's still worth trying.... try to stay optimistic and look into some alternate options and see what happens.... all the best.... take care.
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