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Newly Diagnosed in the middle of first OB and in agony.


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Hello to anyone reading this 

I am currently in my first ever outbreak, and was diagnosed on Saturday, although my symptoms started on Tuesday 11th and I was pretty sure it was herpes before going to the clinic. 
When the nurse looked at me she winced, so it know it is a bad outbreak, and when she took a culture from the tissue I screamed in absolute agony, I have never felt anything like this pain. 
I am suffering from pretty much every symptom.. flu, muscle aches, fatigue, pain from the blisters, burning sensations, tingling etc...
I was given medication when I went, and the nurse asked me to go back tomorrow so she can see if its helping and how I'm doing, or if I need a higher dosage...
I am just so overwhelmed and feel generally shit. I can't tell me family whats wrong but obviously they can see tell something is up as I've been bed ridden and visibly down for a week and been taking baths 2-3 times a day.
I recently started seeing/sleeping with a new guy so feel that its possible that he gave it to me, as I haven't had sex for nine months before this, When I told him he was really nice and support and said nothing has changed so that has helped. 
But i still feel really disgusting just because its so painful and therefore can't stop thinking about it, and it looks horrible. My vagina which i once thought was a nice vagina as they go, a,d have been told its nice, is now a mess, and I feel like its never going to be the same.

I just want this outbreak to end and feel like it never will so I can get on with my life. Im extremely worried that I am going to have painful recurrent outbreaks to the point where I can't do things I usually do. I AM scared of having to tell future partners as I'm afraid they will just think of that everytime it gets sexual. I feel like thats all I am going to think about whenever I get intimate. 
I am also scared the skin won't heal and will be sensitive forever so when I do have sex it will hurt. 
Basically I am a mess and don't know what to think or how to feel or what to do. I just want it to go away :(
So I decided to join this site and see if anyone feels the same or has felt the same, gain any advice or wisdom and hear about other peoples experiences. 

If you have read this thanks for listening to me feel completely sorry for myself but I don't know how else to explain how I am feeling

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There is pretty much no doubt here that your current partner is the source of the herpes infection. He's right in the sense from his perspective nothing has changed as he cannot technically be reinfected with the type of herpes he has passed on here.

I suggest you ascertain type as soon as you can. When the swab comes back and if positive, confirm that it has been properly typed and not assumed to be HSV-2 simply because it was taken from the genital region. It could be that this partner has an oral cold sore HSV-1 infection that has passed to you through oral sex.

You can certainly expect this to be your worst outbreak, ever! Some say Epsom salt baths are very helpful as might be a cream you usually find soothing for your skin.

Staying on a couple of weeks worth of antivirals will help a lot.

However there is a bit of tough it out involved here I am sorry to say.

The good news is that you will get your lady parts back and I am sure you'll be getting more compliments on them very soon!

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Yup, I definitely remember the pain from my first outbreak. I was going to see a neurologist cause the body pains wouldn't let up for about 3 months. Eventually it did, about a year later, life went back to normal. I'm on antivirals daily for about 2 years now, it has helped a lot with the outbreaks. However I always noticed things I never noticed before having herpes. I get itchy based on certain foods or beverages I have. Sometimes I just get itches in general all over my body.... thats about it. It's a little reminder I suppose that I have herpes.

This is a great forum for people like yourself so stay active on it. And for people asking what is wrong with you, just tell folks you are sick, you think its the flu. Despite it lasting 3 months... it worked for me.

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Thank you for taking the time to reply to me, I know that once this outbreak is over and I am feeling better I probably will not feel so bad, and that any future partners that think herpes is a deal breaker aren't really the kind of people I should be looking to have a relationship with anyway. I think it is just because I have am feeling so run down and in pain, and really isolated that I am feeling so crappy. It definitely helps knowing that so many people have it and deal with it and still live normal lives and are happy. I suppose I am also stressed because I am about to finish my university degree and have so much work to do, but I have felt so unwell and distracted this past week I haven't been able to do any.. which is in turn stressing me out! 
I also think maybe this will force me to change my diet and lifestyle as I don't always eat the best and don't really get much exercise so I guess thats a positive...
Its just shit that something like this can change your whole life, whereas people that only get it on their lips probably never ever have these worries or doubts! 
I have been really starting to feel happy and confident in myself again after going through a really low low point at the end of last year, and now this has happened and I just feel like I have been knocked back to square one again. 

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@BumbleBee22 oh girl trust me I feel you.

I'm currently suffering from my second OB and damn it's so annoying, frustrating, emotional, and such a discomfort.

I feel dirty, angry and drained. Everyone is different but I feel as if my second OB has been worse that my first. And it crept up on me without any warning. Just boom hello I'm here to cause you and your vagina hell.


like @WilsoInAus said, Epsom salts in a bath help sooth the itch, I also add a few drops of Tea Tree oil as a disinfectant.

although I'm still finding out how to deal with the burn during the day when I'm out and active. (I'm super active, always cycling, running or doing some activity) and the OB puts my life and mood on hold. Although I still have to go to work.


Just remember you're not alone and this is the perfect place to discuss how you feel.

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I had my first OB about a month ago. I had the flu like symptoms and basically wanted to die. I was home for a week. Told everyone it was the flu. As for the pain, my doctor told me to get Anecream 5% to help with the pain. It really helped. I can totally relate what you're going through. I'm now trying to adjust to this new normal and how to avoid the next OB by way of changing what I eat, getting enough sleep, and exercise. Not the way I wanted to get healthier.

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    • Nameshame
      @WilsoInAus do you really thing that above my symptoms are Herpes related? Or it may because of Herpes zoster shingles? Bcz of this my Igm is positive?
    • Nameshame
      @WilsoInAus i requested my partner, but they are refusing from testing and saying they dint had any symptoms. Now the only way i left is to wait untill 12 weeks window period right? I am not getting what to do in this case. Any suggestion for any other tests?
    • CHT
      Hi "Jeremy"..... I agree, the topic of your HSV status does not need to be something you disclose too soon in a developing relationship..... get to know each other first....see how it's going and as it progresses, then the HSV issue will naturally need to be revealed.... it's my personal opinion though that before there is any sexual encounter you ought to disclose your HSV status.... I know some will disagree with me on this but, I think it is morally wrong not to disclose first.  This can be a make/break situation for most people but, again, I feel it is simply wrong not to give the other person the whole story since your decision not to disclose could put their health at risk.... that is simply not an option in my opinion.  Looking back to my "pre-HSV" life I most certainly would want my partner to disclose their HSV+ status before intimacy so that I could make my decision as to whether I want to take that risk or not.... 
    • Jeremy Spokein
      Thanks, CHT. I appreciate the feedback. The whole trauma of going through this has led me to figure out a lot about myself and my attachment wounds, so I'm taking courses to come out of this better. This girl really was my dream woman in so many ways, it's been the hardest heartbreak to deal with ever. I'm truly in a lot of pain, but using the pain as fuel to launch that new business and work with coaches. I also opened up to my family about HSV, so my parents and sister know now, and they were very loving and accepting of it. Since opening up about it, I feel way better around this thing. After opening up, I also found out that some mutual friends in our family have discordant couples who are married with children, so HSV hasn't stopped them from living a loving life. The thing is... all of these couples I mention did not disclose until 6-8 months into the relationship. So now I'm thinking it might be better not to disclose until I know things are very serious. I'll of course stay on the medication and use protection, but maybe this is a better route than disclosing upfront and scaring women off.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
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