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Successful Disclosure


Antoinette63

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Today I told the guy I've been dating that I have HSV-2. I've been dating him for almost 2 months. We'd  kissed before and he'd fingered me, but I never let it get further. I was nervous because he doesn't like to talk AT ALL.

We were lounging around & I said, "Can we talk about something serious? When is the last time you were checked for STDs?" He said last year & asked me the same. I said "6 months ago, but before that, I found out I got herpes from when my ex cheated on me.

 I wanted to let you know because I respect you and I like you." He joked & said, "So what if you didn't like me." We laughed,  and I asked him if he knew much about it & he said no. I told him that there are different strains of herpes, like cold sores, shingles & even chickenpox , that I don't have outbreaks often, and that I take medicine for it.

He stopped me and said "It's ok, I like you." We had sex a few hours later lol, but I'm still going to give him more info on it and about transmission rates etc. 

I feel more confident for if/when I have to have the talk again!

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That is good to hear and thank you for sharing and it goes to prove that you cannot make assumptions that someone will reject you because you don't know how they feel about it.  I would say I've had 80% acceptance and I thought that I would never be accepted so I really made the wrong assumption

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    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @JackThrowAway herpes causes an outbreak where it enters the body first and maybe a progressive spread. If it doesn't cause an outbreak at the entry site then it won't cause one elsewhere, it also won't 'jump' upon infection - it would be more likely that the lesions are continuous from the penis to the anus. Nevertheless, testing trumps symptoms or any interpretation of symptoms. The correct conclusive result arises when: you have a positive swab; or An IgG HSV-2 level over 3.5 (Herpeselect test).
    • Lcj987
      Slept with someone unprotected, roughly 2 weeks ago now. I felt generally unwell the couple of days after but I’d been drinking the whole weekend and didn’t have much sleep either of the days of that weekend so put it down to that. 6 days after I noticed these spots appear on the shaft of my penis. Along with symptoms of discomfort in my shaft in the couple of days prior to them appearing. No pain when urinating at all that I have noticed. They don’t hurt, itch or tingle and they don’t have fluid in from what I can see or feel if I squeeze them and have never burst? I went to a sexual health clinic to get checked up, they took bloods to do a full test and looked at the spots but said they saw nothing that concerned them but I’m not sure about that, any advice? The smaller spots under the shaft are just follicles I had diagnosed years ago and non-sti related.
    • JackThrowAway
      She tested positive for HSV2. No, there was nothing of that sort in that area.   However I also have ulcerative colitis so I’m on medication that makes me immunosuppressed. I have been bleeding a bit when I pass stools during the time of redness, so I’m unsure if I’m getting a flare from the colitis (from all the stress of everything) or if it’s due to the virus making it’s way to an already inflamed area and popping up as blisters that I can’t see and hence the bleeding.    I had two equivocal results (at 4 weeks and 6 weeks) that then went to a positive result (7 weeks after exposure). Combine that with some flu symptoms, redness, tingling etc. makes me feel it’s conclusive that this points to a hsv2 infection.
    • Anonimus
      Thanks!!!!! I appreciate your help.
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