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Why do you disclose before asking your partner to get tested?

chainondoor

By chainondoor,
in Disclosure (telling)

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chainondoor Honeycomb Member

chainondoor

Posted
Posted

Everyone on here is worried about disclosing.

But how do you know what they have or don't have? I mean firstly 70% people don't know they have HSV.

And don't you ever worry about the (worse) things people might give YOU?

Everyone wears herpes like a badge of shame, but really it's one of the least dangerous stds.. (it's not life threatening)

 

Just a thought...

 

Thanks.

  • WilsoInAus and Whyyyyy
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Lisajd Platinum Support Member

Lisajd

Posted
Posted

This is is actually spot on.  I often tell people to talk about mutual testing.  There is higher risk of aids with hsv2.  I also feel that too many people worry about being rejected.  You don't know the other person situation and you don't know how they will view herpes so you cannot make an assumption without giving that person the opportunity it is just wrong.  And if you're worried about being rejected then you're not ready to date

  • Lauren125638 and LillianPanos
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    • WilsoInAus
      Could this be hsv-2?

      By WilsoInAus · Posted

      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
    • WilsoInAus
      Unsure if Herpes, awaiting swabs, need help

      By WilsoInAus · Posted

      Hey @JackThrowAway herpes causes an outbreak where it enters the body first and maybe a progressive spread. If it doesn't cause an outbreak at the entry site then it won't cause one elsewhere, it also won't 'jump' upon infection - it would be more likely that the lesions are continuous from the penis to the anus. Nevertheless, testing trumps symptoms or any interpretation of symptoms. The correct conclusive result arises when: you have a positive swab; or An IgG HSV-2 level over 3.5 (Herpeselect test).
    • Lcj987
      Could this be hsv-2?

      By Lcj987 · Posted

      Slept with someone unprotected, roughly 2 weeks ago now. I felt generally unwell the couple of days after but I’d been drinking the whole weekend and didn’t have much sleep either of the days of that weekend so put it down to that. 6 days after I noticed these spots appear on the shaft of my penis. Along with symptoms of discomfort in my shaft in the couple of days prior to them appearing. No pain when urinating at all that I have noticed. They don’t hurt, itch or tingle and they don’t have fluid in from what I can see or feel if I squeeze them and have never burst? I went to a sexual health clinic to get checked up, they took bloods to do a full test and looked at the spots but said they saw nothing that concerned them but I’m not sure about that, any advice? The smaller spots under the shaft are just follicles I had diagnosed years ago and non-sti related.
    • JackThrowAway
      Unsure if Herpes, awaiting swabs, need help

      By JackThrowAway · Posted

      She tested positive for HSV2. No, there was nothing of that sort in that area.   However I also have ulcerative colitis so I’m on medication that makes me immunosuppressed. I have been bleeding a bit when I pass stools during the time of redness, so I’m unsure if I’m getting a flare from the colitis (from all the stress of everything) or if it’s due to the virus making it’s way to an already inflamed area and popping up as blisters that I can’t see and hence the bleeding.    I had two equivocal results (at 4 weeks and 6 weeks) that then went to a positive result (7 weeks after exposure). Combine that with some flu symptoms, redness, tingling etc. makes me feel it’s conclusive that this points to a hsv2 infection.
    • Anonimus
      HELP! Conflicting results (different reference values)

      By Anonimus · Posted

      Thanks!!!!! I appreciate your help.
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