Jump to content
World's Largest Herpes Support Group
Sign in to follow this  
parabola

Newbie

Recommended Posts

parabola

So, I just found out two days ago I got HSV.... Not because my girlfriend (7 months) was honest with me, but because of an outbreak. I am currently in the anger/resentment phase. She claims the doctors didn't give her a definitive answer & neither did the few tests they did since her first outbreak last December. She said the last test she took was "positive for exposure to HSV-1" & nothing on HSV-2. She stopped taking Valtrex in the beginning of August because she was under the impression it wasn't helpful and wouldn't reduce risk of transmission anyways.

I noticed some little red spots in my groin area above my penis and confronted her inquisitively, thinking it was just some kind of rash or something stupid. The she told me.

I just went through testicular cancer and lost my right testicle back in May. It's been an eventful year.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
lilanne19

I can't even imagine having to face what you've gone through. The good news is that aside from annoying outbreaks herpes will not have the same adverse affects as cancer. I have always said that herpes is far more devastating emotionally than physically ( I was diagnosed exactly a month ago today) and you have a double whammy not only do you have it but you have it because your gf didn't bother to educate herself about this disease. Playing devils advocate maybe she wasn't aware she could pass it to you gentially. I only say that because if she was uneducated about the facts (which it sounds like she is) then she didn't do it intentionally, which may help you get over your feelings of anger and resentment. The thing about doctors and herpes is as long as its been around they don't seem to know much about it. When I was told by both my Primary Care Physician and my GYN they made it seem like it was nothing. They didn't give me any advice, pamplets, just said to call if I wanted a perscription for Valtrex. My gyn even told me that I didn't need to tell the guy I am dating (I did anyway because it was the right thing to do). My only point in telling you this, is if she had a doctor like either of mine and if she didn't bother to educate herself it's possible she really didn't know. Why she didn't bother to educate herself on this is beyond my comprehension. It's downright unbelieveable, however, that's stupidity not deceitfulness. Unfortunately, you have to live with that for the rest of your life. If you're outbreaks are too painful get some meds because from what I hear they can help. But more importantly, take care of yourself. You more than anyone else know how fragile life is, so try not to spend so much time in the anger stage (even if you never forgive her). This disease is manageable and with time you will be able to move on (with or without her). I hoped this helped a little.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
parabola

Well luckily my 1st OB isn't that bad. No itching, pain, or irritation.... just red spots and very little weaping.

The messed up part is that my health Insurance company dropped my coverage retroactively to my enrollment date (May of this year). They are saying the cancer was a pre-existing condition and defaulting my application. So, now I have to pay for my operation, x-rays, catscans, office visits, etc out of my own pocket. Prolly gonna be $10k or more. I found out my coverage was dropped the same day I got my OB. I can't even go to the doctor to continue monitoring my cancer remission, get tested for HSV or a script for Valtrex. I am using my gf's for now. What a week this has been.

Technically she is my ex-gf. I broke up with her last week for an unrelated reason. She is still living with me until she finishes school in a couple months. We had intercourse (against my wishes, I didn't want to because of my own reasons plus we are no longer "together"... she begged me, I finally caved) the day before her 2nd OB this passed Sunday & now here I am. I just can't help but think, what if I stuck to my guns and not had intercourse with her? Would I be ok? It had been a couple weeks since the last time we had sex and she would have had her 2nd OB and known for sure what was going on.

Oh well, shoulda, coulda, woulda, but I didn't. One day at a time now...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
lilanne19

Wow, I'm sorry about the insurance. You can go to another insurance company. What will usually happen is that when they see your history they may say you only qualify for certain plans (i.e., higher deductible and premium but it should still be cheaper than trying to pay for it out of your pocket. I'm definitely with you on the one day at a time thing, it's been an emotional day for me as well. I'm still waiting on the results from my bf's test to see if I've infected him. But I just keep saying to myself "this too shall pass".

Definitely look at other insurance companies I'm sure you will be able to find something. Don't beat yourself up with the shoulda, coulda, woulda's. They definitely do not help if they did I would be a self help guru by now :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • The Hive is Thriving!

    • Total Topics
      69,563
    • Total Posts
      468,599
  • Posts

    • WilsoInAus
      @Talx2520 based on what you say, Im not sure the odds exceed 50/50 that you have genital herpes. If you take a random genital infection from vaginal sex then about 95% of the time it’s HSV-2. How long after the episode was the blood test?
    • Talx2520
      Thanks for the response! My first suspected outbreak was definitely painful. Started with what felt like a UTI, then noticed what looked like ulcers starting 1.5 days after unprotected sex. Never scabbed over, but I had a horrible itch that lasted 2  weeks (didn't feel like yeast). Given my symptoms, I've pretty sure its genital herpes, but I mean it could have been some allergy (I had extremely rough intercourse in the middle of the wilderness, sorry if that is tmi lol and maybe naive of me to think it was a weird plant). Both my mom, sister, and grandma get coldsores and I feel like i've totally shared drinks with them even during their outbreaks. Can't remember if I ever had one though. I am not totally sure how I should go about disclosing in general. Should I mention I had a full panel and hsv-1 came up positive and that I am not sure where it is? I really wish I had just gotten it swabbed, but couldn't afford it without insurance at the time. I was under the impression that if it was herpes, it would come back and I could get it swabbed, but I realize now that with HSV-1 that isnt always the case. 
    • WilsoInAus
      @viralfrog given your symptoms do not react to any known antiviral doesn thatvsuggest these are not herpes lesion?  Lets apply Occam’s razor here.
    • viralfrog
      @Lulupazoola I have tried with a straw but it's difficult to create enough suction if the straw is deep enough in your throat  After drinking 6g from a shotglass I immediately drink a glass of water to dilute it down the throat.  Little update: blisters, redness and lethargy are back today. I'm still off the antivirals completely and my outbreaks are not any worse than usual for now. That's interesting, it seems I don't react at all to Acyclovir.   
    • viralfrog
      Technically speaking, someone with a strong immune system could have a mild initial outbreak. Normally, they would remain mild and decrease over time. However, if you put yourself in a situation later that gives a big hit to your immune system (e.g. binge drinking, other illness, no sleep etc.) you could have a bigger outbreak as a result. 
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.