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RRR

Hey, just diagnosed 3 days ago. I went to the ER 3 days before that they basically told me I had genital  herpes. I am 23 and never imagined myself here. I've only had 5 sexual partners and that's what upsets me. I know people who've had sex with dozens and seem To be STD free. I'm really struggling on how to tell my mother and brother we are all really close. Any advice? Was thinking about waiting a couple of months until I figured out how to deal with this but it's hard keeping it in.

 

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Disc0rdant
38 minutes ago, RRR said:

Hey, just diagnosed 3 days ago. I went to the ER 3 days before that they basically told me I had genital  herpes. I am 23 and never imagined myself here. I've only had 5 sexual partners and that's what upsets me. I know people who've had sex with dozens and seem To be STD free. I'm really struggling on how to tell my mother and brother we are all really close. Any advice? Was thinking about waiting a couple of months until I figured out how to deal with this but it's hard keeping it in.

 

Keep it in for now.  I know of family members that blabbed to other family members who blabbed.  I know my sister in law's sister has hsv2.  Stupid.  I should not know this!

Trust me.  I tell people openly I have hsv1.  There is still stigma, but not near as high.  I get it, though.  Hsv1 is everywhere and recurs seldom.  Just post on here.  

By the way, I have only had 5 partners but my wife cheated.  I turned down random women who have thrown sex at me or my precious # would be about 10.  I got lucky over all....  

I test.  Always.

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Disc0rdant
44 minutes ago, RRR said:

Hey, just diagnosed 3 days ago. I went to the ER 3 days before that they basically told me I had genital  herpes. I am 23 and never imagined myself here. I've only had 5 sexual partners and that's what upsets me. I know people who've had sex with dozens and seem To be STD free. I'm really struggling on how to tell my mother and brother we are all really close. Any advice? Was thinking about waiting a couple of months until I figured out how to deal with this but it's hard keeping it in.

 

I am sorry you are going through this, kid.  Be gentle to yourself.  Do you know what type yet?

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I'm so sorry you're going through this, though you have come to the right place! I'm 24 and only a few months into having this diagnosis, I still have my bad days! You're more than welcome to contact me if you ever need the support, either way there are some great people here! 

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Lisajd

you feel its unfair you got herpes with inly having had a few partners.   Many people have sex with one person and  get herpes.  it does not matter how many times you do or don't have sex.  If you have sex you risk getting an STD and how do you know that those people don't actually have herpes.  It does not make you any less of a person if you have lots of sex and it doesn't mean that you deserve herpes because you have lots of sex either. 

 

I understand that you feel getting herpes at a young age sucks but I also want to tell you that you have so much you can still do with your life and there is so much you can enjoy and herpes will not stop you from doing that.

You don't really need to tell anybody other than someone you are going to be sexual with that you have the virus but certainly a close friend or your mother would be a good support for you.  The best thing you can do is actually educate yourself about the virus so you understand what it means for you going forward and also the risks and precautions and once you do that you will see that it is not such a bad thing. 

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RRR
6 hours ago, Disc0rdant said:

I am sorry you are going through this, kid.  Be gentle to yourself.  Do you know what type yet?

 

6 hours ago, Disc0rdant said:

I am sorry you are going through this, kid.  Be gentle to yourself.  Do you know what type yet?

I don't I assumed it was 2 because it was around my vagina, is that not always the case? 

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RRR
4 hours ago, Lisajd said:

you feel its unfair you got herpes with inly having had a few partners.   Many people have sex with one person and  get herpes.  it does not matter how many times you do or don't have sex.  If you have sex you risk getting an STD and how do you know that those people don't actually have herpes.  It does not make you any less of a person if you have lots of sex and it doesn't mean that you deserve herpes because you have lots of sex either. 

 

I understand that you feel getting herpes at a young age sucks but I also want to tell you that you have so much you can still do with your life and there is so much you can enjoy and herpes will not stop you from doing that.

You don't really need to tell anybody other than someone you are going to be sexual with that you have the virus but certainly a close friend or your mother would be a good support for you.  The best thing you can do is actually educate yourself about the virus so you understand what it means for you going forward and also the risks and precautions and once you do that you will see that it is not such a bad thing. 

Thank you. I have been doing a lot of reading about it. It doesn't seem so bad, I guess the stigma of it all is what gets me the most. 

 

Do do you have any go to websites or Or should. Just be  googling stuff? 

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Whyyyyy
55 minutes ago, RRR said:

 

I don't I assumed it was 2 because it was around my vagina, is that not always the case? 

So you can have either type down there and research says it makes a difference...gentital hsv1 tends to be milder according to experts and sheds less (is less transmittable)... people typically get it from receiving oral sex from someone who gets cold sores. 

56 minutes ago, RRR said:

Thank you. I have been doing a lot of reading about it. It doesn't seem so bad, I guess the stigma of it all is what gets me the most. 

 

Do do you have any go to websites or Or should. Just be  googling stuff? 

Pinktent.com is a good resource 

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Disc0rdant
13 hours ago, RRR said:

 

I don't I assumed it was 2 because it was around my vagina, is that not always the case? 

It could be either type.  If type 1, so many folks have it...  In my opinion, easier to deal w both physically and mentally.  It doesnt make it less painful when you have a sore, though....

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