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Poisonflower

Starting to feel like I'll never find love again

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Poisonflower

I recently disclosed. To a guy I thought was my friend. He seemed to be all in with dating me and talking to me...until I told him. Now he doesn't even want to hang as friends. So I learned two things that hurt me. He wasn't a very good friend cause he lied and only wanted to sleep with me. And I'm literally unfuckable even if that's all I wanted too. Consider my feelings dead...

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Stillme1968

you found out

1. he was only interested in you for one thing

2. you found out that you now must find someone interested in you as a whole person  and who cares about you

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Sweatpea85

I had something very similar happen, he was very comforting but in the past week has been distant even though he initially said no he said he would give it more thought. I don't know when to bring this up because I need closure . 

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Lisajd

And this is where it comes down to herpes actually being a saviour in some instances because it brings out a persons true colours and also what they are really interested in you for

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Disc0rdant
7 hours ago, Lisajd said:

And this is where it comes down to herpes actually being a saviour in some instances because it brings out a persons true colours and also what they are really interested in you for

Agree somewhat.  With me it comes down to risk and finding my fit.  My fit probably needs to have hsv1 so both she and I aren't scared of me passing it.  My fit also wont have hsv2 so both her and I arent concerned with passing.  

I am talking w a few girls.  Who knows if any will make the cut.  Met a gorgeous one at the bar Thursday.  We are in the same place in life.  (Kids almost grown...)  My son is 14, hers 16....

Man do I want more kids.  Like 6 more!

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Disc0rdant
On 6/14/2017 at 2:18 PM, Stillme1968 said:

you found out

1. he was only interested in you for one thing

2. you found out that you now must find someone interested in you as a whole person  and who cares about you

I would look at it more as "criteria".  We all have criteria whether we admit it or not.  If a potential mate doesn't tick off certain boxes, they are out.  Life is a number's game.  Get yourself out there, you will find someone.  

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Nightmare7575

I just found out also after just going in to reassure myself I did not have anything since I had no symptoms and I did not get the result I was expecting which is why I am here.. I am still in shock and in the same boat like everybody here,if I did not have an extended family that I would have hurt,I would have just ended my life then,but can't do that because of family,so here I am. 

I had a friends once who told his wife he had cancer and she left him,I have another friend who has been sick for years and many any guys could not handle it and now she has a guy who is over the top taking care of her,so the point being people leave for all kinds of reasons when something happens ,just like they may leave us. That guy you talk  about could not handle it,so then NEXT and maybe NEXT AGAIN AND AGAIN until somebody does, 

So you people maybe afraid too have intercourse or Oral  with you or you maybe afraid to do both with them ,so how about telling them all the things you can do, hand jobs ,nipple play ,Oral with a rubber, mutual masturbation  and then pull out your Vibrator and say this is how you can get me off ,so that night you may not be fuckable .but the fun does not have to stop there. What about people are paralyzed and have no feelings, millions still have great sex lives from what I have read, they just think outside the box,like all of us may have to. 

 

I think a lot us need to read the section where people who have had this for years and years to see how they have made it through.

 

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MissOptimystic

This has happened to me before too. If he truly was your friend and truly loved you, it wouldn't have changed anything. And at the LEAST he would've remained your friend.

Thank herpes for taking someone out of your life that didn't belong there and wasn't there for your best interest. I know it hurts, I've been there, but in the long run I'm glad I don't have any fake "guy friends" around anymore. If anything it taught me they just wanted to sleep with me and once that cat came out of the bag, it ended up protecting me from being more hurt in the end.

On another note, I had a guy friend I told who liked me who made the decision not to be with me romantically. It hurt a lot at the time, but in the long run it did not change our friendship in the least and if anything we are closer as friends now. He actually proved he cares about me as a person even if he has decided not to take the risk. Luckily though, I've been with plenty of non-H men who have taken the risk. They are out there, don't give up!

Edited by MissOptimystic

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