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vr00mm

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vr00mm

Hi Everyone!

I have come across this site only a few hours ago. I have posted 2 of my issues so far.

I supposedly off to an event right now but i could not bring myself to go because i was depressed, sad and concerns but things are changing....

A few days ago, I got rejected by a potential man because I disclosed my condition on day 4 of our interaction. (duh)

He is on the other side of the world anyway so I didn't think we can form a relationship. By the way,  this is the second time I disclosed . The first time disclosed is with my x but i did not know that i have HPV 2. I found out later on the relationship when i had blisters and had them checked. He was surprised at first, he had himself checked, came out negative yet still wanted to continue the relationship. While i think this was noble, i think a large reason is because he didn't have much love for himself. We broke up due to his growing depression. He said , another disease would not matter to him as he was already left with one kidney anyway. He had a kidney cancer years before he met me. So I am unsure if i should have felt  flattered that he wanted to continue the relationship. He was not a great talker so he didn't say things that ensure me that he decided to continue because i was awesome lol.

This last guy, i was pretty smitten by him. I thought we bonded well and we talked about potentiality of a relationship though i was still very doubtful it will work because of the distance. I disclosed to him 2 days ago and he politely said that he didnt wish to continue due to the obvious reasons. Surprisingly to me, I got really upset but  i didnt show it to him. I put on a brave face and thank him for our lovely short time. Since then, I experienced grief, worry of the future, even had thought of suicides! ( never going to act on it though).

I could not eat much. I experienced the same things many experienced here on this forum. 

I then decided to joined this site and spent countless hours reading stories and gotten myself to read success stories just in the last hour. I must say i feel a huge burden lifted off my shoulders. Thank you!!!

I was torn between disclosing or never disclosing one day. How would i disclose it one day to a potential someone? should i disclosing in a light hearted way? A lot of things swirling inside my head. I know for sure i will not disclose it on day 5 of getting to know each other!!lol.

I received wise advises before this that say i am valuable despite HSV 2  and had agreed  until a man that i liked rejected me because of the virus. 

Anyway, right now i feel stronger and hopeful that the right person will come and accept me for who i am. Meanwhile, probably best for me not to be too hopeful nor invest so much emotions into a new relationship until THE TALK. (this is going to be a challenge for me)

I am grateful for this site. Love hearing success stories from people who walk it. 

:)

 

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JBnATL

There is a great section of this website called "The Secret to my Success" it has hundreds of posts from people who thought no one would want them and they ended up finding someone who did not care.

Personally, I have disclosed a dozen times and have NEVER been rejected.  At first I was scared shitless to give the 'talk' but the more I learned about it and the more I had success the easier it got.  If I were ever to be rejected because of this, I would feel sorry for her.  I have a post on this website on how I disclose and it has been viewed almost 40,000 times :D

Good luck!

JB

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Lisajd

I think you need to consider the people you are meeting.   Try meeting someone local and get to know them in person.  I think its also about education.  Ive disclosed many times and not had an issue.  You can also talk about stds and testing as a way into the topic.  This way you are not disclosing and can gauge their knowledge and views on it. 

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