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Ashley08

I told him

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Ashley08

I am 29 female, I was diagnosed it a year and half ago, I was very devastated. The first OB I had was really bad, I had flu like symptoms and the sore lasted over a week. After that I had blister a couple of times and it gets itchy now and then but it was bareable.
The biggest fear for me now is to talk about this to others. I haven't told any of my family or friends yet. There was a guy who I've been talking to about few months, last time things got intimate I stopped, because i was scared to tell him. Yesterday I saw him and I felt like I have to tell him so I did. He seemed shocked, i said sorry and he said "its okay and glad  you said something about it but don't  know what to say" . We didn't have sex. He acted as usual which was a relief for me. Im scared to contact him again. I was hoping to even just be friends like before but I don't know how he think about me now. I've been in tears last few days.

anyone with advice/experience would be much appreciated. I need someone I can speak to about it.

 

thank you.

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Whyyyyy

Hey love!!! First, you did the right thing!!! I think you should give him some time to digest the information...

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Nightmare7575

I have had to tell nobody yet ,so all I can do is think of what I would want to hear as the other person and I would say,have him over for dinner and break out a list of every wild non- risy sexual  thing you can do to him and he can do to you,the shy part ended once you had the talk ,so now let him know that there is still plenty of fun to be had in the bedroom..

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Whyyyyy

You can still have sex too...take antivirals, use condoms and pay attention to your body!

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Lisajd

Dang my post didnt post.  Dont bring up h again. Say hey great seeing you lets catch up soon. That will get a response one way or another. 

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Ashley08
12 hours ago, Whyyyyy said:

Hey love!!! First, you did the right thing!!! I think you should give him some time to digest the information...

Thank you, I wouldn't want anyone to be in the position I am now, not to have a choice of what could happen to ones health. I'm glad his reaction wasn't very negative one.

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Ashley08
8 hours ago, Nightmare7575 said:

I have had to tell nobody yet ,so all I can do is think of what I would want to hear as the other person and I would say,have him over for dinner and break out a list of every wild non- risy sexual  thing you can do to him and he can do to you,the shy part ended once you had the talk ,so now let him know that there is still plenty of fun to be had in the bedroom..

I'll go through them with him if he asks anything about it, or ever be in that situation again.

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Ashley08
7 hours ago, Whyyyyy said:

You can still have sex too...take antivirals, use condoms and pay attention to your body!

I don't currently take antiviral, I take it when there's OB but last time I felt like the itchiness stayed while I was taking it and it stopped when I stopped taking it.

would you know how far prior you need to take antiviral to get the effect of it?

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Ashley08
3 hours ago, Lisajd said:

Dang my post didnt post.  Dont bring up h again. Say hey great seeing you lets catch up soon. That will get a response one way or another. 

Hi Lisa, I think you replied to my post on other community too.. thank you again :)

i don't know if I've been too overreacting, he's the second person I disclosed to and I'm just afraid of rejection and what he thinks of me now. I messaged him saying hope we can still be friends, and he said of course there's no reason not to. Even if he doesnt want our relationship in that way I enjoy his company as a friend so I am really glad to hear him saying that.

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Lisajd

I think you have to really put it into perspective because you can be rejected even if you don't have herpes you could meet a guy and you think it's all amazing and then three months down the track it doesn't work out. Ie been with a guy for a year I've said that in my other posts but it hasn't worked out and he accepted me for having h so now im way back to square one again.  But if he's happy to be friends then that's great and who knows what might happen down the track but if he meet someone else it may be hard to be friends as well and I've been through that where they're just cut me out because I started dating someone else

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Ashley08
On 11/07/2017 at 10:32 AM, Lisajd said:

I think you have to really put it into perspective because you can be rejected even if you don't have herpes you could meet a guy and you think it's all amazing and then three months down the track it doesn't work out. Ie been with a guy for a year I've said that in my other posts but it hasn't worked out and he accepted me for having h so now im way back to square one again.  But if he's happy to be friends then that's great and who knows what might happen down the track but if he meet someone else it may be hard to be friends as well and I've been through that where they're just cut me out because I started dating someone else

That is very true. When things doesn't happen then it doesn't so I am trying to keep that in my head.
You really give good advice, Lisa, making me think positive!

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