Hi everyone. I'm new to these forums. I'm not sure of my status since my possible exposure in September. I have been tested five days after exposure and it came back negative. I keep getting more and more symptoms on and off. I have been every doctor from primary, gyno, dermatologist and dentist. My anxiety is out of control that I've been prescribed ssris but scared to take it since I read that someone said it caused their outbreak. I have been having nightmares about sores covering my face and thighs. I feel terrified of my own body. Being on here has helped some with getting all of this off my chest. If anyone wants to talk I'm here.
Wow. So, I just got the test results about an hour ago. After calling my mom and sobbing uncontrollably, I did some reading. I read a lot about other women's experiences, and also ended up on this website. Needless to say, I am incredibly upset about it. I feel disgusting. Dirty, gross, like nothing. The worst part: I don't know who gave it to me. I have had more than one sexual partner this past month, and frankly, it is going to be fucking hard to tell them. I don't know how I am going to tell these people, how they will react, if they will tell our friends. Who will I be known as? Who will I become? I'm concerned about future relationships. How to tell those future boyfriends. Will anyone ever love me? I don't want this to become who I am, but right now in the moment, it's hard. Luckily, I am getting medication and seeing a therapist next week. I think that will help. I'm shattered. I'm currently in college, and this is going to be a chip on my shoulder for a while. It almost sucks not having other people know, because they have no idea how hard this is or what I'm going through-- getting diagnosed, all the symptoms, etc. For now, I'm going to try and just take each day at a time. Morale is low, will to live is low, but we always make it to tomorrow. Always. It's never the end, and I don't want this to be the end. Anyways, here I am: needing support, and also ready to give it.
By Spotted Dick Mccgee
The doctor couldn’t tell me for sure and I’m still waiting for the results. I had unprotected sex with a new partner about five days ago. Three days after I woke up with these red spots everywhere. If anything they’ve gotten smaller. There’s no pain/discharge and only minor itching and irritation of my foreskin. What do you think?
Count your blessings and not your problems. Realize that yesterday is gone, today is here, and tomorrow is beginning.
Let it go and seize the day while you still have it.
In the end, you will find your true self and love them even more.
First of all, wow. What a wonderful community of people here on honeycomb and across the web. I experienced my first outbreak of HSV 1- genital last week and I am so grateful of all the helpful tips and tricks and stories I have read. It truly helped me get through what has been the most painful week of my life: physically and emotionally.
I got married in May 2018 to the man of my dreams after 4 very happy years of growth and love together. Literally days after we returned from our honeymoon I thought I had some severe chaffing from walking around and sweating. I was so tired, my vagina was inflamed, and soon after days of ignoring the issue/assuming it would go away, I had ulcers form all over my genital area. And I mean ALL over!
Peeing felt like passing razor blades, I couldn’t clean myself properly, I was afraid to eat or drink, I could barely move and most of all the pain was unbelievable. Before I went to the Gynocologist and got visual diagnosis of herpes I thought it was anything, but that. I have been in a steady relationship for 4 years and I was certain there was no way this virus would sit dormant in me for that long. However, the Doctor took a look and told me it looked a lot like herpes.
Through my sobbing and shock, I could barely pull myself together. I actually spoke to an on site therapist for about an hour about my fears of my new husband finding me disgusting and viewing me as a burden he was stuck with. I was terrified to tell him.
However, when I shared the news I was met with unconditional love, understanding and concern. This negative situation actually brought us closer as newly weds. He has been a great support system for me.
Now, the outbreak has cleared up, but I am experiecing some nerve and “phantom pains” down there. There’s a numbing pain in my butt and left leg that is incredibly irritating. Has anyone else experienced this?
On another note, I am curious to hear stories of over coming the lack of sexiness and lack of libido after finding out you have herpes? How do you get back the confidence and urge to have sex again?
Thanks for your time!
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