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I am going to the "Veterans" for this question in hopes you can help. I'd like to get a few names of "Herpes Experts" that will do a phone consult with my husband and me to see if there is anything we are missing or if there are any other tests we can do. I am willing to pay for a phone consult. Can you all recommend anyone?
Well it has been a while since I last posted, but I have achieved an anniversary, since I left my ex. I am happier and no outbreaks, but other health concerns. I am also complete with my anxiety medication. Life has calmed down, but it was a hell of a lot of work which is still on going. This summer I will visit friends and worry if I can transmit herpes via eating utensils. Please can anyone answer this for me?
Sometimes I think about starting to date, but really do not want to be any worse. Please (family) do not take this the wrong way. I do not want to feel any worse and TRULY do not want to make anyone feel worse. Don't think I can handle that right now. So I keep hanging out with my friends and attending events alone. I LOVE THIS. My ex did not enjoy the things I did and this past year I have attended so many events. So nice- and I can breathe again.
Hi, I am newly diagnosed and so is my bf. If he has both hsv1&2 and I have ghsv2 only what does our sex life look like now? I get such different answers from different Dr's and nurses. They really don't seem to have any consensus on how to keep us from making this worse for both of us.
I guess my specific questions are 1) how can we prevent him from transmitting hsv1 to me? 2) does it matter if we use condoms at this point if we haven't been using them for the past 8 months? 3) can we ever have oral sex again without condoms/dental dams and all that crap? 4) If we have sex when neither of us is having an OB is it going to cause one?
He is asymptomatic, didn't even know he had either one, and I just had a really bad first OB (gential) after being with him for 8 months not using any protection. We know he gave it to me, as I had a clear IGG right before we met. What do we do now?
I haven't been on in a while as I've been busy with work and music and pursuing a career, but from what I've been reading - which seems to be stemming from a lot of fear and anxiety - I feel like it would help to tell my story, and that is one of complete transparency between me and friends, as well as sexual partners.
When I first contracted ghsv2, I - like many of you - thought my sex life was over. The first year was difficult, feeling like I would only be able to meet people online for the rest of my life. After a lot of thought, however, I began to realise that I could either begin living my life the way I wanted to live it, or crawl back into a dark hole and disappear.
I chose a regular life, and the way I did that was by focusing on improving myself rather than focusing on what others thought of me. I joined a new band, started a new job, and started meeting new people, and meeting people was how I discovered the easiest way to overcome herpes was by telling them on the first day the same way you'd tell someone you have a cold.
At first it wasn't as easy as I thought it'd be - but that's okay. Trying things for the first time are always awkward, but eventually it became the most mundane part of my conversations. I told close friends, family, then not so close friends, then sometimes people at work - I would talk about the community around it, talk about how rewarding it is to help newly diagnosed people on message boards by letting them know that this thing really isn't a big deal. I would talk about it like it was laundry that I needed to do when I got home. I realised almost immediately that the vast majority of people don't even blink when you say it, and even more people ask you questions about it, which - in my opinion - puts you in a powerful position to snuff out the awful stigma around herpes.
When it comes to sexual partners, I'll often wait for the moment before things get going before saying "hey, just so you know I get cold sores sometimes, so we should use a condom." This isn't meant to catch people off guard, it's just a way to express confidence in who you are as a person. By bringing it up as casually as possible, you take all power away from herpes by treating it the way it really is - a common, irrelevant virus. I have never been turned down because of herpes, but I have had people ask me questions about transmission, and I will always return to the same statement, which goes something like this: "Yep, no matter how many precautions you take there's always a risk - but that's true for everyone you'll ever meet in your entire life. At least with me, I know that I have it, which means I take precautions to keep people safe. It's so evasive that it's the same risk no matter who you sleep with."
I guess the reason I am writing this is because I want you guys to know that despite all the negativity, the fear, the self-doubt, the stress, the insecurity, the low self-esteem that comes with having herpes (it happens to all of us) just know that you are as beautiful of a person as you'll ever be and that herpes is as serious as you make it. One of my favourite comedians growing up was Eddie Izzard, a transvestite, who believes that if you tell people your secret, it's no longer a secret, and therefore has lost most of its negative meaning. There is nothing positive about "herpes" as people understand it, so create your own meaning and tell the world, because in my opinion, the only cure we'll ever have in this lifetime is self-confidence and open dialogue.
I am a newly diagnosed (<1 year) HSV2 positive female. For the first time since my diagnosis, I started to hook up with a guy and things got heated. Being the fact that I didn't tell him about the situation, no intercourse happened however, at one point he fingered me and in the heat of the brought his fingers to his mouth. Although no direct oral sex from him to me happened, we are worried about the rate of transmission. I am on valacycolvir daily had no sign of an outbreak and no prodrome pain from shedding (I've experienced nerve pain in the past). I also went down on him and, even though I do not have oral HSV2, this is also something he is concerned about.
I would like to know if anyone has had any similar experiences to mine or has any information on how likely it may be that he has been put at risk, anything to ease the anxiety...