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Donnie

Is it too late to sue?

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Hello everyone,

i contracted hsv2 from a hookup that happened a year ago. It 100% has effected my every day life. I have an outbreak once a month and prodromes seem to always be around (my lymph node closest to my outbreak is almost always swollen). Not only do I have the embarrassment of my doctor knowing, but being in relationships seems absolutely impossible. I have been turned away so many times- and each time I am left with ANOTHER person who knows and who can spread the drama.

the person I contracted from used no condom and did not tell me anything. While I did not ask, I feel that it was his responsibility to tell me- especially that I was visibly intoxicated.

my question now is, is it too late to make an attempt to sue someone over negligence that happened over a year ago? I have a witness and I have doctor evidence from two weeks following the event. I am a college student spending hundreds of dollars on treatments and it just doesn’t seem fair anymore. Would I even have a case over something that happened so long ago?

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You will find not comfort following this path. The infection is unnoticed in 70% of the people who have it, and is not screened for on standard STI tests, unless specifically requested. Even if it is requested, most of the time there is no surefire way of testing and knowing 100% that you do or do not have it. Only the relatively new PCR test, when done during an outbreak (which 70%  of people never have) is 100% reliable. (For example, my initial outbreak culture swab came back negative, as did a blood test taken 2 months later, but that in NO WAY means I don't have it.)

What is more, the majority of the adult population has oral herpes, and yet we're all enjoying great oral sex. In other words, getting herpes is automatically a part of the casual sex (and even non casual sex) scene.

You're hurting right now and looking for something, like justice. You will find none.

 

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Look under "Everything Else Herpes" there's a thread with people asking the same thing.  It depends on the laws in your state.

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If you can prove he was diagnosed and knew prior to sex with you, you may have a shot. Depends on your state laws.

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I assume it would depend on your state laws but from the cases I've read online I think you should be fine.  You need to contact an attorney in your state to know for sure.  There are people that don't sue until they get divorced even though transmission happened years earlier.  Get a free consultation from an attorney.  

Good for you for trying to pursue justice.   Do not listen to the poster above that says getting herpes is part of the casual sex scene.  People shouldn't be trying to infect anyone with this. It's not the cold/flu.   I am looking into it and suing may not be as bad as you think.  Depending on the state, you may be able to sue anonymously.  Settlements are very common before and after filing a lawsuit so you likely won't even have to go to trial. 

 

Edited by HoneyBunny1
adding more info

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You would probably lose in court, because it's a common virus and so many have it and are unaware and undiagnosed . . . So even if you could establish some evidence that he was the guy that gave it to you, it would be hard to prove beyond a reasonable doubt - and proving intent would be even harder . . . You could try to subpoena his medical records to see if he had a prior diagnosis, but there's 80% chance (just statistically) that he didn't . . . That's not to say you SHOULDN'T try a lawsuit though, because you might be able to disrupt his life enough that he would pay you to go away . . . The risk is that you both might be publicly exposed in legal filings as being involved in a herpes-related legal dispute involving an alleged drunken one-night stand, which might be embarrassing . . . But, that's also why the guy might pay you some money to go away . . . It's really a question of whether or not you think it would be morally justified to try to shake this guy down for some cash, and if you want to incur the reputation risks of attempting such a move . . . You won't be furthering "justice" at all, but maybe you might score a Pyrrhic victory, exacting some measure of vengeance by forcing him to respond to your allegations, plus maybe you might gain a small amount of cash if he wants to keep his name out of your legal filings? . . . If you think it would make you happy, then sure, give it a shot . . .

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Whilst I understand that your life is difficult at the moment the first year can be more challenging in terms of symptoms for some pple  so things may improve for you going forward.  

You would also have to prove that prior to engagement with this person that you have been tested for herpes and secondly you did state that you did not ask him his status and nor did you insist on condoms I assume.  The reality is we all have a responsibility for our own sexual health and whilst it is against the law in some countries you would need to be able to prove that you did not have herpes before this man

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