really scared

[canthisbetrue]

Ok so I've been having some irritation 'down there' lately and I went to the Dr. today, with no clue on what she was going to say. I've been married for 5 1/2 yrs, have 2 kids, and have had no serious issues before, but I just knew something was not right.

THEN SHE DROPS THIS H-WORD ON ME...I MEAN I COULDNT EVEN BREATHE WHEN SHE SAID SHE THINKS ITS HERPES!! HERPES....HOW COULD THAT BE? I'VE BEEN WITH THE SAME MAN FOR 6+ YEARS AND JUST STARTED HAVING THESE SYMPTOMS VERY RECENTLY...FIRST THOUGH...HAS HE DONE SOMETHING?? NO, NOT MY HUSBAND....I DONT THINK HE EVER WOULD, AND I KNOW THAT I HAVEN'T SO HOW???

SHE SAYS ITS POSSIBLE TO HAVE GOTTEN IT YEARS AGO, NOT KNOW, NOT HAD ANY SYMPTOMS AT ALL....ALMOST 7 YRS?? NO CANT BE.

SOMEHOW I MADE IT THOUGH THE APT. WITHOUT FALLING APART, I MEAN I WAS JUST IN SHOCK, BUT I BARELY MADE IT OUT THE DOOR AND BURST INTO TEARS...HOW??

NEXT THING THAT POPS INTO MY HEAD IS AN EX OF MINE HAD THIS COLD SORE-HERPES THING ON HIS LIP & CHIN...FOR LIKE A MONTH....FELT LIKE FOREVER....BUT WE WERE CAREFUL, WE DIDN'T KISS OR ANYTHING....OR MAYBE WE DID B4 IT TOTALLY CAME OUT!??! WAIT...IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE TO GET GENITAL HERPES FROM HERPES ON THE FACE? APPARENTLY SO I'VE JUST READ!! BUT STILL....THAT WAS 8 YEARS AGO....A LIFETIME AGO....A MARRIAGE, 2 KIDS

I FEEL LIKE, I DONT EVEN KNOW. I FEEL TERRIBLE, I MEAN SHE TOOK THE TEST, I DONT KNOW FOR SURE YET, BUT EVERYTHING THAT I'VE READ SO FAR MAKES SENSE. ALL THE SYMPTOMS SEEM TO FIT, AND NOW I HAVE TO WAIT 7 DAYS TO FIND OUT FOR SURE. I WASNT EVEN GOING TO TELL MY HUSBAND...HOW DO YOU BREAK THAT NEWS?? HIS FIRST THOUGHT IS GOING TO BE...DID I CHEAT, HOW COULD HE NOT THINK THAT? HES GOING TO FLIP, BE FREAKED OUT, TOTALLY TURNED OFF, I MEAN HE DOESNT THINK HE GETS ENOUGH NOW....IMAGINE THIS!!!

I DID TELL HIM, I DONT THINK HE BELIEVES IT, I DONT WANT TO EITHER...IM GOING TO BE 26 IN 2 WEEKS...IM SO YOUNG TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH SOMETHING LIKE THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE? HOW COULD WE POSSIBLY HAVE SEX AGAIN, I MEAN I'VE READ THERE ARE WAYS, BUT...IT SEEMS EMOTIONALLY DISTURBING, AND I MEAN, WILL I NEVER GET ORAL SEX AGAIN?? HOW COULD I EXPECT HIM TO DO THAT?? EWL, HE IS GOING TO SKEEVE ME, I SKEEVE ME.

THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME TO HANDLE....I JUST STOPPED TAKING ANTI-ANXIETY MEDS, I WAS ABOUT TO START THIS CLEANSE DIET TO LOOSE SOME WEIGHT, TO FEEL SEXY AGAIN....ME SEXY, WITH HERPES....YEA OK

I FEEL DISGUSTING, EMBARASSED, ASHAMED, EVEN THOUGH I MEAN, ITS NOT MY FAULT RIGHT?? I HAD MY FAIR SHARE OF GUYS AND WAS PROB A LITTLE PROMISCUOUS AND NOT THAT CAREFUL....BUT THAT WAS YEARS AGO....IM A MOTHER NOW....IM NOT THAT SAME GIRL, SO WHY IS MY PAST COMING BACK TO HAUNT ME?? AND ACTUALLY IF IT DID COME FROM THE EX I MENTIONED, WE WERE SERIOUS, TOGETHER FOR A LONG TIME....I DONT KNOW I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS RUNNING THROUGH MY HEAD...IM REALLY SCARED...

[ducky406]

Relaaaaaax. Hard to say now I know, but you will be fine. I got my lovely gift in the middle of a commited relationship and was floored too. I got it from oral sex and my boyfriend doesn't ever even remember having a cold sore. Did you know that up to 90% of the general population has oral herpes? A good deal of them never get cold sores but can still be randomly contagious. Have the doctor test a sore if possible for the type, also a blood type. If it's type 1 down below chances are it's from oral sex. Think about what you had been doing right before coming down with the symptoms. I started getting itchy a day after we had oral sex. When the doctor told me that it all made sense and I wasn't worried about anyone cheating anymore.

I'm a mom too and just a little older than you. Take CARE of yourself and don't worry about feeling gross right now, I did too. When you do a little research you will see that you are definitely not alone and millions of people have this very common virus. A lot of people you know right now and are close to have this and you probably don't even know. Chin up, we are here for you!!