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Totally F*cked Over - Hate my life - Lost Hope


f*ckedOver

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I just gotta say that I absolutely hate some people out there. I have been reading some forums on reddit, honeycomb and others. 
So many of you people want to believe that your risk to transmit is so low or non existent because of pills or the years you have had this bullS*it virus, and especially the asymptomatic ones. 

BULLSH*T !!!!!

You do infect people and you need to do other people the service of not screwing their life over by giving them a fair chance. 

I was infected but a real estate lawyer in Denver. This B*tch lied about her age by 10 years, saying she was 43 years old and turns out she is 54.  I slowly began to realize I was getting manipulated and lied to and begin to question other things; by then it was too late. 

I am a college student and I wanted to explore the supposed "milf" shenanigans.  Thinking I was having a little fun by exploring my sexuality.  This woman KNEW she had HSV2, this woman DID NOT AND DOES NOT TAKE anti-virals. She also PUSHES YOU TO USE LAMBSKIN condoms. Me being niave didn't think anything of it.  In one of my encounters with this EVIL b*Tch we got drunk and one of the "sessions" a condom was not used. I had not f*cking idea  would be setting myself up, or better yet getting set up for a life full of misery and depression. 

Within a matter of 2 weeks I noticed I had 2 strange sores that presented themselves as almost wart like, zit like. Accompanied by an insane amount of itching. About a week prior I has asked this woman about std's because the original story she gave me was that she married for years and clean. WHen asked directly about stds, she claimed she was tested last October and that she was "CLEAN".  On the third time I went to go meet up with this person, she decided to disclose to me that she has HSV2 for many years most likely, she claimed she wasn;t sure when she contracted it, she claimed she didn;t give it to her previous husband, she claimed that she was "SPECIAL CASE, in which she did not and does not infect people !!!!!!!!! I have never wanted to get revenge so badly in my life. I hope karma serves this b*tch a life of misery until she takes her last breath. 

I am now 30 years old and have to look forward to these nonstop outbreaks that remind almost ever 2, or 3 weeks if I am lucky of one choice to meet up with a woman who manipulates and lies about her situation. HOw can someone be so f*cking evil to convine themselves that they do not infect people, they are some "Special Case". THen when I call her out on her bullsh*t she proclaims it was my fault we didn't use a condom, it was my fault that i chose to have sex with her. B*tch !!! I didn't know you would lie about having an incurable disease !!!!!!!!!

It took me so long to build my self into a confident man and have had very minimal partners in my lifetime.  I reach a point where I finally feel close to 100% confident and got to a point of loving my self only to have it all taken away by some selfish c*nt who cared more about her goddamn self than someone else's risk of health. 

The sad part is, I wanted to sue this person. Guess what. I fail test after test after test, but I have outbreak after outbreak.  I was infected in January 2017, by June I have managed to get the first cold sores in my mouth. I get tested IGG yet again and 3 months later offering plenty of time for antibodies to show up. NOTHING !!!

It's like the goddamn virus is taking over my body. THe sores never present them selves as blisters. THey range from looking like zits with puss and a lot of blood >>> to zits with a solid white core>>> to red sores that are deep and extremely painful to touch. 

Since June ( the first time I have ever had a cold sore in my life orally) -- I have semi-regular scalp itching, random sores on my scalp, random sores in my nose, random- semi regular itching on my nose, random zit like sores on my eyelids and in my eyelids.  I have been to multiple doctors and an opthamologist and they don';t seem to think I have herpes.  SO how the f*ck can I suee this b*tch when I continuously get outbreak after outbreak, but yet no positive test. I have finally saved up enough money to attempt the western blot. 

Even then it appears I am too late to sue this c*nt because she filed bankruptcy and listed me on her list as a potential creditor. SHE KNEW SHE F*CKED UP and I have no evidence. 

For all the people that say you can't tell who gave you herpes, that is BULLSh*T !!! If you have an encounter with someone and then get symptoms 1 to 3 weeks later, it is a pretty clear indication of whom gave it to you. Especially if you have had only 1 partner in the last 9 months prior. Especially if you had blood tests in the past. 

I pretty much have given up on life with exception of school, work, and my dog. My sexual desire has hit rock bottom, I have pretty much come to the conclusion that I will be single for the rest of my life.  Sure I have read plenty of stories about women having success, well sorry I am not sexist, but you are a goddamn woman !!! Women have much easier time finding a guy won't mind versus a clean woman that won't mind.  Women already have options up the ying yang, ( at least most of them). 

I am now on a path of self prison, because I can't possibly live knowing that I infected someone or put someone else at risk. 

I just don't know what to do anymore. My parents told me to find support groups or a councilor. I can barely afford rent, and I have pretty much no social life. I wanted to have a little fun between semester last year start off January 2017 with a bang, a bang of a f*cking virus that can't be cured. 

Then it appears that the FDA pretty much does not give a sh*t about herpes sufferers. They would rather make money of people managing the virus than actually doing something about it.  Hey guys we are raking in millions, let's keep trying the same approach to a vaccine over and over and over. Let's make it so goddamn hard to develop something that researchers and companies will just give up or not even fund the research from the get go. 

3 girlfriends in my entire life, now 30 years old and i get f*cked by some evil woman that had to lie about her age, her std status, and not only that but her height !!! then when I called her out on her lieing about her height and age she says, oh well I am this height in heels. blahhh blahhhh f*ck the world and all the evil ass people in it.  I have never shafted anyone intentionally in my life and yet somehow I earn this karma !?!?!??!? 

 

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@f*ckedOver Wow, yes she was dead wrong & she knows it! Adding you as a possible debtor to avoid a lawsuit, that's low! 

If you get outbreaks so often, have you ever gotten them swabbed or just gotten blood test? Some people never show a positive blood test, but show positive when they get bumps swabbed. That would be cheaper than WB if you haven't already gone that route. 

I'm assuming they won't prescribe you antivirals because you aren't testing positive, correct? Have you tried any of the natural supplements that have helped some people on the forum? Colostrum, Resveratrol and olive leaf extract are all popular helpful herbs. You cab also try ordering antivirals online, some sites you don't need an RX. 

Finally please don't give up. Create a "fake" Facebook account and join one of the herpes support groups in your area. I'm sure you will be so many beautiful women in the same boat as you. People think it's easier for women but unfortunately that's not always the case and your giver is an example of this. I know a woman who doesn't disclose after having it over 10 years. My giver lied to me when I repeatedly asked about status and testing. I yesterday negative before and during our relationship, didn't catch from him until 3 years in. I am symptomatic and am currently on the herbs I mentioned before. I think they are helping, I had gone 3 months OB free but had slacked off and got another one so back on consistently. 

 

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