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jermhoop

40 Year Old Single Father of Two Daughters

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jermhoop

Hi everyone. I'm Jeremy and I'm a single father of two daughters living in Utah and am 40 years old. I kissed a girl on a date a couple months ago and little did I know that she had oral hsv1, though I didn't know what it was at the time. I later saw her and she had a cold sore, which I asked her about. By that time, I had researched what was going on with me as I had my primary outbreak on Jan 1 (what a way to welcome the new year) for about a week.

I know that my two daughters don't have the virus as I've tested negative for it in the past (I tested positive at 1.0 iGG this past week) and my ex-wife is also negative. So I'm pretty concerned about the likelihood I can transmit this to them. I've had 4 or so very minor breakouts since January 1st - a pimple on the lip, mustache area, one small one on my chin. My outbreaks seem to be about once or twice a week and started in early February and are very minor so far, but every few days it feels like there is slight tingling and some pain in my mouth area.

My question is, for my daughters who don't have this virus, can I hug them? How should I cook for them? I am washing my hands regularly and always checking my face... Besides just very careful hygeine, what are the chances I could pass this on to my daughters? It's my primary concern not do to that. Also, the outbreaks are happening regularly and I'm eating pretty healthily. I'm aware of L-Lysine and the arginine ratio of foods. I drink a lot of water, take supplements. I heard over time, the outbreaks become less frequent/severe.

Been having a hard time psychologically with this. I know there's much worse things that can happen, but I'm feeling pretty depressed and can't bear the thought of my daughters getting this (they are 10 and 7).

Edited by jermhoop

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Taintedgirl

Avoid contact during outbreaks, make washing your hands a priority and use Lysol disinfectant spray it kills herpes. Also don’t share utensils or drinking glasses. I’m sorry you’re going through this and it could possibly affect the little women in your life but you’re apart of a great group of people who are here for you every step of the way. Your story is like so many other people here. Hopefully the future has better for us. If you’re that worried maybe incorporate disposable gloves when cooking just to minimize risk. 

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Cas9
25 minutes ago, jermhoop said:

Hi everyone. I'm Jeremy and I'm a single father of two daughters living in Utah and am 40 years old. I kissed a girl on a date a couple months ago and little did I know that she had oral hsv1, though I didn't know what it was at the time. I later saw her and she had a cold sore, which I asked her about. By that time, I had researched what was going on with me as I had my primary outbreak on Jan 1 (what a way to welcome the new year) for about a week.

I know that my two daughters don't have the virus as I've tested negative for it in the past (I tested positive at 1.0 iGG this past week) and my ex-wife is also negative. So I'm pretty concerned about the likelihood I can transmit this to them. I've had 4 or so very minor breakouts since January 1st - a pimple on the lip, mustache area, one small one on my chin. My outbreaks seem to be about once or twice a week and started in early February and are very minor so far, but every few days it feels like there is slight tingling and some pain in my mouth area.

My question is, for my daughters who don't have this virus, can I hug them? How should I cook for them? I am washing my hands regularly and always checking my face... Besides just very careful hygeine, what are the chances I could pass this on to my daughters? It's my primary concern not do to that. Also, the outbreaks are happening regularly and I'm eating pretty healthily. I'm aware of L-Lysine and the arginine ratio of foods. I drink a lot of water, take supplements. I heard over time, the outbreaks become less frequent/severe.

Been having a hard time psychologically with this. I know there's much worse things that can happen, but I'm feeling pretty depressed and can't bear the thought of my daughters getting this (they are 10 and 7).

Your concerns are way overblown. The location of your ohsv1 is in your face and no where else. The virus resides in the nerve bundle sort of in front of your ears. When it becomes active it travels to the location of your infection; i.e. your mouth area. If you have an active cold sore, then don't kiss your kids, and don't share any items that you were in contact with your lips. By the way, regular soap and water KILLS herpes; i.e. you don't need industrial strength anything.

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jermhoop

Thanks Taintedgirl and Cas9 for your responses. Sounds like just being careful and making sure I practice good hygiene are my best bets. I don't want my kids to be paranoid, but do want them to not contract the virus from me.

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Cas9
56 minutes ago, jermhoop said:

Thanks Taintedgirl and Cas9 for your responses. Sounds like just being careful and making sure I practice good hygiene are my best bets. I don't want my kids to be paranoid, but do want them to not contract the virus from me.

ohsv1 is so common that if you don't have it you are in the minority. Decades ago, passing this virus was not even given a second thought. I still remember being in first grade and having a fever, and having a cold sore and asking my father what it was. He just smiled and said it's a fever blister. That was 1960. In those days, no one gave a cold sore a second thought. Everyone had it.

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Spicycupcake

Herpes is spread by the friction of skin to skin contact. Which is why it's transmitted sexually (HSV-2) and via kissing. Although I would definitely avoid kissing your kids during an outbreak, it really is unlikely that you'd transmit it if you gave them a quick kiss. You will not transmit it by hugging them or touching them in any other way.  It's all very nerve-wracking in the beginning and I was just as nervous as a parent. I'd really recommend picking up a copy of Terri Warren's book "The Good News About the Bad News: Herpes - Everything You Need to Know." She is a nurse with a herpes clinic who has been in the field for many years. She knows what she's talking about. I think it will help you feel a lot better about things. It helped me. Best of luck!

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jermhoop

Thank you Spicycupcake. I will take a look at her book!

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