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Shocked and hurt

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Hi Everyone,

Here is just a brief discription of my ordeal. I was in a serious relationship for 2 years, due to my job, I had to relocate to another state. My boyfriend did not want a long distance relationship and broke it off. That was a little over a year ago. I have dated a couple times over the year but never had intercourse until now. I just met someone, who I thought was pretty special. We dated for a month before we became initmate. Well, needless to say, he "forgot" to mention that he had herpes. I just went to the doctor this morning, and now I have it. I have done nothing but cry my eyes out since my appointment and I feel as though my chances for ever having another relationship is over.

I have so many questions, but right now I am just too numb to even think about it anymore.

I hope I can gain some understanding through this support group.

Thanks for listening,


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i know the feeling- just because they look clean doesnt mean they are, does it:(

i've never slept with anyone else and my boyfriend didnt even realise he had it, he's NEVER had any symptoms...and now i have it...and i have all the bloody symptoms including flu-like symptoms, aching and im in incredible pain everytime i need the toilet! its worse than people think isnt it?

love love x

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    • Abdul malik
      I'm in ny and 39 inshallah Allah u still check for this
    • WilsoInAus
      That's exactly right, you can return to your life and get the blood test as a sleep easy in 12 weeks time (from the last episode).
    • Laurenhelena
      Him and his ex have regular breakouts with all the traditional symptoms and I believe he was swabbed.  So I can return to life as it was before all of this drama ? I may still look into a blood test is I am confident it is accurate 
    • WilsoInAus
      @Laurenhelena how is this guy sure he has herpes? All sounding a bit odd to me. Yes it is very unlikely you will develop lesions now. Rubbing skin to skin is required for any feasible transmission chance. The odds of transmission with unprotected vaginal sex are of the order of 0.08% per epsiode. Halve this if a condom is worn. Compare that to chamydia that has about a 33% chance of transmission with unprotected sex; now that's contagious!
    • Laurenhelena
      I just feel that it’s known as such a contagious STD - I’ve been lying to my family cause when I tried to talk about it they became very anxious and begged me to tell them I hadn’t slept with him when I had - If someone told me that they slept with someone with genital herpes my mind would instantly think they had it.  So it’s unlikely then that I’m going to get symptoms now? I’m not going anything further with that guy but we have cuddled and kissed in bed with underwear on, is that ok?  Im quite sure he has hsv2 given that his ex gave it to him through a threesome  I’ve never had a cold sore   
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