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Protected Sex with high risk female

friendlyguy131

By friendlyguy131,
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friendlyguy131 Honeycomb Member

friendlyguy131

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Hello on Sunday afternoon I brought home a girl that I found out later used to be a sex worker. I'm not sure for how long but shes 24 years old. I asked if she was clean she said yea she gets tested a lot. In my stupidity I went ahead with the act. She performed protected oral on me and then we did protected doggy style for only a few minutes. The condom never slipped an inch but I know herpes can be shared while wearing protection.Over the next day I masturbated a total of 3 or 4 times which isn't too far above normal when I have the house to myself. 
The day after the initial encounter I started to have huge regret and anxiety about the whole thing and started to feel "symtoms". First thing I noticed was the tip of my penis at the hole is uncomfortably sore but not unbearable. I keep my hair trimmed so I'm always a but itchy but my anxiety is making it more noticeable in my head. I am experiencing some hot flashes and a bit of back pain but again I feel like that could be explained by the anxiety. for a couple of hours I did feel a "tingle" at the very tip of my penis. still no bumps or lesions yet. Is this too soon to feel anything and I'm just paranoid or is there something else going on. 
This is the only new partner ive been with in the last 7 years and I thought I did everything safe but now I don't know what to think.

It's day 5 and a half now and the Flu like symptoms are mostly gone but my Lymph nodes under my ear have been visibly swollen for the last 24 hours and a sunburn looking rash on my face and neck. I still have no lesions or bumps. most of my discomfort is in the rest of my body not my groin. 

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Beachlovr88 Honeycomb Member

Beachlovr88

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I would definitely go in, and get tested. Insurance covers preventative screenings, and there are also free clinics. 

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friendlyguy131 Honeycomb Member

friendlyguy131

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2 minutes ago, Beachlovr88 said:

I would definitely go in, and get tested. Insurance covers preventative screenings, and there are also free clinics. 

I'm going in as soon as tomorrow or I have an appointment for sure on Monday but if I don't have a sore by then will they be able to test?

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Beachlovr88 Honeycomb Member

Beachlovr88

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Yes, the only way to find out if you're HSV positive is by doing a blood test. So, you'll tell the doctor your symptoms, and then you can ask for a blood test. They'll draw your blood and send it to a lab, and it will take 3 to 5 days to get your results back, depending on how far away the lab is.

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friendlyguy131 Honeycomb Member

friendlyguy131

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6 minutes ago, Beachlovr88 said:

Yes, the only way to find out if you're HSV positive is by doing a blood test. So, you'll tell the doctor your symptoms, and then you can ask for a blood test. They'll draw your blood and send it to a lab, and it will take 3 to 5 days to get your results back, depending on how far away the lab is.

I was under the impression that a blood test this early was less accurate.

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WilsoInAus Platinum Support Member

WilsoInAus

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Hey mate. I think you are letting the stress of the situation overwhelm you somewhat.

At this time, a blood test will only indicate your herpes status before this episode (which may be worth doing).

It is best to have lesions swabbed, should this happen. Without such lesions, there's little indication a herpes infection took place. Lesions will occur at  least at the location where the virus entered the body. It is there not possible to have a lesion that appears only in the well protected area.

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friendlyguy131 Honeycomb Member

friendlyguy131

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I'm trying to stay positive but every other sign and symtom I have points to a Viral Infection of some kind and the timing of the sex is too perfect to ignore. the only symtoms I don't have is the actual visual signs.

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Beachlovr88 Honeycomb Member

Beachlovr88

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Men often don have any symptoms at all. Blood tests are the best and only way to find out, especially early on. Swab tests aren't as accurate. Trust me haha but since the lady you had intercourse with was once a sex worker, you definitely want to get tested anyway. To protect yourself and others from anything you might have contracted. You might not have anything to worry about. But its always a good idea to be proactive when it comes to sexual health. 

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friendlyguy131 Honeycomb Member

friendlyguy131

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Blood test is on Monday and if anything grows by then they will have something to swab..The female seems to be very asymptomatic but isn't on any antiviral. I take responsibility for my dumb actions but what kind of shitty hand to be dealt. One time short encounter with protection the whole time and my life as I know it is over...

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Beachlovr88 Honeycomb Member

Beachlovr88

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On May 19, 2018 at 3:56 PM, BrotherD said:

Blood test is on Monday and if anything grows by then they will have something to swab..The female seems to be very asymptomatic but isn't on any antiviral. I take responsibility for my dumb actions but what kind of shitty hand to be dealt. One time short encounter with protection the whole time and my life as I know it is over...

It's certainly feels that way, doesn't it? Everyone tells me everything will be okay. And I can't help but disagree. But since you used protection, there's a good chance you'll be in the clear. So, you'll probably be just fine. 

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    • CHT
      SUCCESS STORY: Herpes is an opportunity to built trust and connection through vulnerability.

      By CHT · Posted

      Hi "Jeremy"..... I agree, the topic of your HSV status does not need to be something you disclose too soon in a developing relationship..... get to know each other first....see how it's going and as it progresses, then the HSV issue will naturally need to be revealed.... it's my personal opinion though that before there is any sexual encounter you ought to disclose your HSV status.... I know some will disagree with me on this but, I think it is morally wrong not to disclose first.  This can be a make/break situation for most people but, again, I feel it is simply wrong not to give the other person the whole story since your decision not to disclose could put their health at risk.... that is simply not an option in my opinion.  Looking back to my "pre-HSV" life I most certainly would want my partner to disclose their HSV+ status before intimacy so that I could make my decision as to whether I want to take that risk or not.... 
    • Jeremy Spokein
      SUCCESS STORY: Herpes is an opportunity to built trust and connection through vulnerability.

      By Jeremy Spokein · Posted

      Thanks, CHT. I appreciate the feedback. The whole trauma of going through this has led me to figure out a lot about myself and my attachment wounds, so I'm taking courses to come out of this better. This girl really was my dream woman in so many ways, it's been the hardest heartbreak to deal with ever. I'm truly in a lot of pain, but using the pain as fuel to launch that new business and work with coaches. I also opened up to my family about HSV, so my parents and sister know now, and they were very loving and accepting of it. Since opening up about it, I feel way better around this thing. After opening up, I also found out that some mutual friends in our family have discordant couples who are married with children, so HSV hasn't stopped them from living a loving life. The thing is... all of these couples I mention did not disclose until 6-8 months into the relationship. So now I'm thinking it might be better not to disclose until I know things are very serious. I'll of course stay on the medication and use protection, but maybe this is a better route than disclosing upfront and scaring women off.
    • WilsoInAus
      Could this be hsv-2?

      By WilsoInAus · Posted

      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
    • WilsoInAus
      Unsure if Herpes, awaiting swabs, need help

      By WilsoInAus · Posted

      Hey @JackThrowAway herpes causes an outbreak where it enters the body first and maybe a progressive spread. If it doesn't cause an outbreak at the entry site then it won't cause one elsewhere, it also won't 'jump' upon infection - it would be more likely that the lesions are continuous from the penis to the anus. Nevertheless, testing trumps symptoms or any interpretation of symptoms. The correct conclusive result arises when: you have a positive swab; or An IgG HSV-2 level over 3.5 (Herpeselect test).
    • Lcj987
      Could this be hsv-2?

      By Lcj987 · Posted

      Slept with someone unprotected, roughly 2 weeks ago now. I felt generally unwell the couple of days after but I’d been drinking the whole weekend and didn’t have much sleep either of the days of that weekend so put it down to that. 6 days after I noticed these spots appear on the shaft of my penis. Along with symptoms of discomfort in my shaft in the couple of days prior to them appearing. No pain when urinating at all that I have noticed. They don’t hurt, itch or tingle and they don’t have fluid in from what I can see or feel if I squeeze them and have never burst? I went to a sexual health clinic to get checked up, they took bloods to do a full test and looked at the spots but said they saw nothing that concerned them but I’m not sure about that, any advice? The smaller spots under the shaft are just follicles I had diagnosed years ago and non-sti related.
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