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in_love

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in_love

Hi everyone,

I enter your site here with hopes of careing answers or hope,

I have met the woman of my dreams,We have been seing eachother only a few weeks but I knew she was the one at first site! We have been together and enjoying time together with our children.I have been trying to get her to open up as far as how she feels about me knowing she does I ask her anyways, Well tonite She Tells me she has Herpes and has sence 17 as she found out while in the army.She is 28 now and has three children lovely children as well,I myself have a 10 year old daugther,We have not had Sex it was not time to do such we were working on getting to know each other.

I am so In Love with this Woman and have been crying sence she told me knowing how hard it was for her to do so.As we talked about it via internet I was reading about it while we talked,I kept asking WHY! and then thinking there are worst things to have at the same time.Trying to start a new relationship then this comming up wow! I do admit, I was speechless.

But as I said How can you Love a person this much and then catch yourself speechless and even thinking to end the relationship...It may seem I'm venting and in some ways I might be But first and foremost I love her.I have never had a fever blister so I only ask you if theres anything wrong with the way I reacted and is it possable for me to overcome this.When she ask me while we were talking tonite as i'm sure she felt me back off while I was taken all of this in I said to her, Keep in mind all relationships face challenges,many far tougher than this.Good relationships stand or fall on far more important issues,Like communication,respect,and or trust so let me soke this in a tad...Of course I read this while we were talking but it seem to fit just what I was trying to say and it's all true I beleave it with all my heart.Any input would be wonderful I need it so bad as I am so inlove with her and she opened up as I ask and now I should answer her soon.

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Claudia

Hi, in_love.

I don't think your reaction--feelings of fear-- was "wrong".

I remember when I was told by a boyfriend that he was pocitive, without symptoms, for hsv2, I felt a lot of fear. Anxiety, which really gets its grips in me, reared its head hard. But untimately the thought that I was not ok with NOT being with my boyfriend, come what may, prevailed.

"all relationships face challenges,many far tougher than this.Good relationships stand or fall on far more important issues,Like communication,respect,and or trust"

I think this is very wise.

My advice is to take the time you need to educate yourself and explore your feelings.

Be well.

Claudia

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Caliope

in_love - have you been tested for hsv and do you know, without the shadow of a doubt, that you have not already been exposed to this virus in your life? They say somewhere between 70-90% of the population over the age of 12 contracts this virus in their lifetime.

It was not until I was diagnosed with hsv that I found out that most dr's do not even test for this virus. You have to ask them to be tested for it and many refuse - citing their reason is that it is very common and no big deal.

What do you think of someone who has herpes? Do you think that this virus changes a person or makes them different from other people? How you answer this question makes all the difference in the world because if you truly believe that a microscopic virus makes someone somehow not as good as other people then perhaps you don't want to pursue a relationship that could be doomed from the start. Only you can answer this.

Do you think that you can walk away from this lovely lady today and never look back? Do you think you can wipe her memory from your mind and never regret walking away? No one says you need to make a choice right now. No one says you must rush into anything. Give this time. Ponder how you feel. Ask questions and find answers and go get yourself tested for hsv. What if you were to walk away only to find you have herpes too?

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in_love

I agree,

And no I can't walk away from her as I said before,I want to deal with this and just learn about it a little.I'm surely not here to run anyone down and Yes I've been tested for STD's

a few years back and all was neg. I am going to go with her to her doc. and ask a few ? and to understand this as she ask me too today.Caliope ty for your time and I will walk thru this slow and make a right choice I'm sure....

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