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I feel like I just want to cry most days.


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Hello all, I feel very discouraged from life now that I know that I have this disease. I feel like I’m very unlovable and that I will never find true love or that true love will never find me. I’m only 26 years old but I feel very tied down and guilty from this disease that I have. I feel so sad every day and I crave affection.  I feel like I can only be with someone else that has the same virus that I have in the future to have an honest relationship. Because let’s be real it would be so hard to tell someone when I have this herpes disease. I just feel very lonely,  And I feel like I can’t get ahead in my life because I’m so depressed sometimes ha ha it seems like that’s all I can think about sometimes is the disease and then I have it. Well I hope all of you guys are doing well and I hope you have a great summer :-)

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I feel the same. I am worried about finding someone that will love me. Not only do I have HSV2, but I am a 22 year old single mom of a three month old baby. This past year has been a roller coaster of high's and low's and I'm just about ready to hop off this ride. Thankfully, my son keeps my depression at bay. I love him more than anything else in the world, and the fact that his father didn't want him makes it so much easier to suppress suicidal thoughts. I'm all he has, and I could never leave him. I wish you luck on this journey.

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  • 3 weeks later...



hope u are ok. I understand. I feel

ok but have lots of moments of sadness and it just messes with your head worrying and knowing its in your  system

Thanks for sharing 

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I was just diagnosed yesterday. I’m 27 years old & as soon as I told my boyfriend he said we need a “break” which I know means he blames me & we are done. I feel completely alone and not at all optimistic about future relationships. So I understand how your feeling. 

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    Initially, I felt the same as you, but after 6-12 months, my body adjusted and outbreaks became seldom/rare. Two out of five people are afflicted with HSV or worse, in the U.S., so don't feel like an outcast. 



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I completely feel your pain. I've thought about suicide a few times but am also really trying to turn this negative thing into a positive. What makes this disease so difficult is that you can't share your sadness with anyone else for fear that you will be judged. People seem to show empathy when you have cancer or a degenerative disease that seems like it was completely out of your control.  For some reason, people think this is completely in your control and it's your fault you got herpes.  I've pondered the justification behind the stigma and came up with a conclusion. If anyone want to cast a stone at you, they have no right to judge if they've ever had an STD scare or a pregnancy scare.  Which to me, has been nearly everyone. I can't tell you a person who had used condoms 100% of the time or abstained from sex until marriage except for my parents.

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Hi!! Everyone says it’s not that bad etc etc but I feel like it’s easier for them to say b/c they don’t have it. Time helps. But you have to control your future. I’ve been diagnosed for 2 years and I’ve had my ups and downs. Recently I felt like I had a mental breakdown from all of the loneliness, sadness, anger, bitterness, etc. My mind toyed with suicide as well. But after 2 weeks I realized I can’t be sad anymore. It’s easier said than done. I’ve learned to take one day at a time. I’m not going to get the closure I want or understand why I got this. People keep telling me that one day someone will love me and won’t worry about my condition. I just wait for the day, try to keep myself busy. But if you ever want to talk, feel free to reach out. We can uplift each other.

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    • CHT
      Hi "Jeremy"..... I agree, the topic of your HSV status does not need to be something you disclose too soon in a developing relationship..... get to know each other first....see how it's going and as it progresses, then the HSV issue will naturally need to be revealed.... it's my personal opinion though that before there is any sexual encounter you ought to disclose your HSV status.... I know some will disagree with me on this but, I think it is morally wrong not to disclose first.  This can be a make/break situation for most people but, again, I feel it is simply wrong not to give the other person the whole story since your decision not to disclose could put their health at risk.... that is simply not an option in my opinion.  Looking back to my "pre-HSV" life I most certainly would want my partner to disclose their HSV+ status before intimacy so that I could make my decision as to whether I want to take that risk or not.... 
    • Jeremy Spokein
      Thanks, CHT. I appreciate the feedback. The whole trauma of going through this has led me to figure out a lot about myself and my attachment wounds, so I'm taking courses to come out of this better. This girl really was my dream woman in so many ways, it's been the hardest heartbreak to deal with ever. I'm truly in a lot of pain, but using the pain as fuel to launch that new business and work with coaches. I also opened up to my family about HSV, so my parents and sister know now, and they were very loving and accepting of it. Since opening up about it, I feel way better around this thing. After opening up, I also found out that some mutual friends in our family have discordant couples who are married with children, so HSV hasn't stopped them from living a loving life. The thing is... all of these couples I mention did not disclose until 6-8 months into the relationship. So now I'm thinking it might be better not to disclose until I know things are very serious. I'll of course stay on the medication and use protection, but maybe this is a better route than disclosing upfront and scaring women off.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @JackThrowAway herpes causes an outbreak where it enters the body first and maybe a progressive spread. If it doesn't cause an outbreak at the entry site then it won't cause one elsewhere, it also won't 'jump' upon infection - it would be more likely that the lesions are continuous from the penis to the anus. Nevertheless, testing trumps symptoms or any interpretation of symptoms. The correct conclusive result arises when: you have a positive swab; or An IgG HSV-2 level over 3.5 (Herpeselect test).
    • Lcj987
      Slept with someone unprotected, roughly 2 weeks ago now. I felt generally unwell the couple of days after but I’d been drinking the whole weekend and didn’t have much sleep either of the days of that weekend so put it down to that. 6 days after I noticed these spots appear on the shaft of my penis. Along with symptoms of discomfort in my shaft in the couple of days prior to them appearing. No pain when urinating at all that I have noticed. They don’t hurt, itch or tingle and they don’t have fluid in from what I can see or feel if I squeeze them and have never burst? I went to a sexual health clinic to get checked up, they took bloods to do a full test and looked at the spots but said they saw nothing that concerned them but I’m not sure about that, any advice? The smaller spots under the shaft are just follicles I had diagnosed years ago and non-sti related.
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