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Just diagnosed and struggling


Bca91

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Hey there,

So I was just diagnosed with hsv2 a couple weeks ago with one small sore down there. I panicked because I never saw anything like that down there before. Went to the doctor and confirmed with a swab it's hsv2. My boyfriend is trying to be supportive because we love each other. We want to spend our lives together but he's struggling. He says he loves me just the same and I'm the same girl he fell in love with in the beginning. I'm trying to give him time, and learn more about this so I can better protect him but I feel like he is unintentionally pulling away. He doesn't comfort me and want to touch me. I want to keep him safe and give a wide window of time before and after an outbreak. He has openly admitted to me that he has always been a germaphobe and herpes is the one thing he just is terrified of. He is willing to stay with me but he gets so nervous and worked up he can't allow himself to even discuss it. He has not even been tested yet himself. He's so afraid of what the result will be. I know he loves me but I just need the extra support right now because I feel so ashamed. He tells me he loves me so much, but his actions speak differently. 

Anyone with advice I would love some! I'm still learning about this. Is it safe to be with someone who is negative and will he eventually feel comfortable around me? 

 

Thanks 

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hello I recently got diagnosed with hsv2 not knowing I had it.. just went to the doctor for a normal well woman check up.. the last person I was having sex with wasn’t my boyfriend but we was having unprotected sex for two years! I trusted him once I found out I tired to tell him and want have nothing to do with me like I’m the one in the wrong.. I feel so gross I feel disgusted because I’m talking to someone and I know how to tell him because he is someone I known from my past we never had sex but I dont know how to come out to tell him.. I’m ashamed of this and I feel like my life is ruined..  so I do understand where you are coming From.. 

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I'm not sure who I got it from. I can count on one hand the guys I have slept with and they have all been relationships. The last guy cheated on me so I am assuming it is from him. My current boyfriend and I have  been together for 9 months and we always have used condoms. Neither of us has ever had a sore until now and mine was just one. He says he was very safe in the past as well. At this point I just don't know who it's from but I'm so afraid of losing him. You finally meet the one who you want to spend your life with, talk about marriage with and then this happens. I mean he says he's not going anywhere but I just feel him pulling away. 

I have read that it's safe to have a healthy relationship with someone so long as we use confirms and I take antivirals everyday which I'm starting. So I'm praying everything works out. 

 

 

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Snap1992 I understand. The news hits you like a brick. I feel dirty, like I just want to scrub it out of me. The only comfort I have found is that so many people have this and live normal lives. It lessens overtime and my first out break was not too bad. So I am just hoping and praying that I begin to feel like my normal self and that my boyfriend can also move past it. That's the hardest part for me. I love him so much and I want to protect him from it( he does not know if he has it or not yet) but I also want to feel like we are in our normal relationship. 

Trh to stay positive! I know it sucks but I suppose we will figure out what works for us. I would be open and honest with your guy. If he doesn't understand then shame on him. Someone will in the future. 

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3 hours ago, Bca91 said:

Thank you so much I really appreciate this I didn’t know I could find something like this that will actually try to help me.. cause I only told one of my good friends I can trust but I don’t she understands the pain and hurt I am feeling. Because I didn’t ask for this and the person I  think I got it from want even talk to me like the victim or something because he was sleeping around with other people I wasn’t.. who I am with I never had sex with him yet because I found out this and I don’t know how to tell him so I avoid the sex talk period. I’ve been knowing him for years but never was exclusive. The person I got it from is pissing me off because I felt like he knew the whole time and never told me the way he is acting towards me 

 

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