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Telling new partners you have herpes

Broncogirl

By Broncogirl,
in 55+ years wise

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Broncogirl Newbie

Broncogirl

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just met new guy. Things were going well. It's hard when you're older. I'm 66. We both felt good about connection. I told him I have herpes. He called it off. How do I help him deal with it and reconsider? It's not a death sentence.

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Jane79 Honeycomb Member

Jane79

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No it isnt a death sentence but not everyone is able to accept such things.You shouldn't try to convince him of anything. The person or people who are meant to be in your life won't need convincing. Keep a positive attitude, be honest with yourself and potential partners. You will meet someone that accepts you totally as much as you are willing to accept them totally. Dont lower your standards either for the sake of not being alone. Being alone in peace is better than having a partner in hell.

  • dont quit!17 and Ubikwity
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Chicagonow Established Member

Chicagonow

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Bronco may I ask do u get more ob now. Get scared don't really feel itchy down their but itchy body just scared menopause is right around the corner

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kendall Newbie

kendall

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I went on a second date tonight with a very cool guy I was interested in. I told him about me having herpes and he said he can't date someone with it.. I was bummed we proceded to dinner and I drove home crying all the way. I knew rejection was going to happen someday but I wasn't sure how I'd handle it. I'm glad I let it be known earlier on before catching feelings but I was hurt..

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Kiwanda Honeycomb Member

Kiwanda

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I'm very sorry to hear that Kendall. I haven't dated anyone since my diagnosis earlier this year. Honestly I'm not handling it very well. The prospect of dating again and then being rejected because of what I have is more than I can take right now. I admire your courage for putting yourself out there and being honest! I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

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kendall Newbie

kendall

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Thank you Kiwanda. Although this was my first rejection in years because guys I have dated before has accepted me, I want you to not give up but when you get the courage to put yourself out there you'll be surprised at how many people don't have a problem with it. I just honestly didn't know how to take my first rejection but I feel better now, especially since joining this site tonight. 

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  • 2 years later...
Lucia Newbie

Lucia

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I’ve had Genital Heroes for over 10 years . I didn’t know I had it at first but when I realised I did share it with my partner . I contracted it from a previous partner . My present partner wasn’t worried about it as he had no symptoms. We have since broken up and that was years ago . I can’t seem to enter another relationship as I am  afraid of being rejected . I’ve been on a few dates but really hold back. This of course affects the relationship going further . I feel like this will be my life forever . I want a relationship but can’t see it happening as I don’t think a man will want me with this condition.  

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dont quit!17 Acknowledged Support Member

dont quit!17

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On 3/19/2021 at 6:56 PM, Lucia said:

I’ve had Genital Heroes for over 10 years . I didn’t know I had it at first but when I realised I did share it with my partner . I contracted it from a previous partner . My present partner wasn’t worried about it as he had no symptoms. We have since broken up and that was years ago . I can’t seem to enter another relationship as I am  afraid of being rejected . I’ve been on a few dates but really hold back. This of course affects the relationship going further . I feel like this will be my life forever . I want a relationship but can’t see it happening as I don’t think a man will want me with this condition.  

If a guy really loves, he will accept you, especially a mature one. If not then he wasn't really feeling you. But it does suck having to disclose but it is the more responsible thing to do. 

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      Hang on @tweetsoc this is just self-indulgent self-delusion. What is super tricky about HSV? You're only saying that because of the super trick situation you are in having cheated on your partner, stop deflecting, how does that help anyone least of all yourself? You do not know you are going through an issue with HSV; it is pretty much certain you are not.
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      By WilsoInAus · Posted

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      By Charlie1968 · Posted

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    • tweetsoc
      Does anyone have negative blood work but actually end up having hsv?

      By tweetsoc · Posted

      https://www.thesun.co.uk/living/3104937/its-not-just-a-nasty-incurable-sti-herpes-can-leave-men-impotent-for-life/ https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.2047-2927.2012.00037.x
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